sometimes i forget most people don't know that birdhouse shapes aren't just for shits and giggles and that birds actively prefer and even need specific shapes to nest in
So which ones need the Frank Lloyd Wright ass houses?
the ones that make 240,000$ a year by making other birds work in their warehouse for 5 sunflower seeds a day
future link thinking to himself: how do I one-up that fire guy
Daryl and Marlin, our ship cats! It's Marlin's second season sailing (though he's been with us three years- got locked at the seaport last season for crimes) and Daryl's first! What sweet babies 💖
The people have spoken: What Crimes Has Locked This Poor Soul Away
You are Marlin, ship's cat and mascot of the tallship Lady Washington. It is the summer of 2021, you are about a year old, and full of Mischief.
Lady is docked in the Port of Everett, and no one is paying attention to you- never mind the fact that they're doing their jobs and getting money so they can keep pampering you. No, they're not paying attention to you Right This Instant, so you decide you want to take a little jaunt off the ship and explore on your own.
In addition to the marina, the waterfront, and all manner of other delights, the Port of Everett also has a Naval base, so you decide to check it out! See what all the fuss is about.
Of course, wandering kitties without the proper credentials aren't allowed on high security Naval bases, so when the Marines inevitably capture you and ask you where your people are and what you're doing here and how you got here, you just curl up cutely and bat your eyes and meow the most pitiful meow because these new people are paying attention to you but not the Right attention, no one's even petting you!
They call the number on your collar, which goes to the captain of Lady at the time, who... is on leave. In Florida.
"Ma'am? Is this your cat?"
"Oh god yeah where was he?"
"A high security government facility. Can you come pick him up?"
"Considering I'm on the other side of the country, no. Let me get in contact with the crew to send someone."
"Thank you. Also he's very cute."
"I know."
So the captain does just that, playing telephone while trying to find someone to go pick you up. Except by the time a viable crewmember is chosen and calls back to confirm, you've gotten bored and decided you want to leave.
So you clawed the Marine holding you and escaped.
You get a smidgen more exploring time before you're captured again and taken to your crew and back to the boat, but at this point no one is happy including you, because no one pet you the Whole Time you were off adventuring and that's a damn travesty.
And not only that, when you get back to the ship, you're locked up tight in the aft cabin because no one trusts you anymore not to wander off and break into government facilities when they're not looking, and then when the boat gets back to her homeport in Aberdeen, they do you just the WORST injustice and lock you inside there! For the whole winter! And then the following summer, because you are now a Criminal and Criminals don't sail.
Except this season, you made Big Pouty Eyes at everyone, and they caved and let you back on, so you are a very happy kitty now.
With a tracker in your collar so this doesn't happen again.
Krogan parenting issues.
Meant to finish this on N7 day but stuff got in the way :/
Our theme is “responsibility” at my school right now, and many students have made posters. This one is my favorite:
had no idea guerilla made official horizon reaction gifs but here tey are for everybody to gawk at
The Rolling Stones were by far the band with the wildest audience I have ever seen. Everyone was 60+ except for me and my friends. Every single of those senior citizens was smoking weed and drunk out of their mind. It was insane. I’ve been to many other concerts since then and never have I seen an audience so elderly, inebriated and fun. The parking lot afterwards was crazy too. North Carolina state troopers were trying to herd senior citizens who were boldly toking in front of them and they were failing. Could not be contained. We stayed in the parking lot until 4 am. My godfather passed out on the pavement and his daughter and I had to carry him back to the 80s model Winnebago we carpooled in. He kept telling the state troopers they had “gay ass boots” which is true but shouldn’t be said.
mass effect is a power fantasy because Shepard doesn’t have to answer any of her emails
marisha: h–
travis: ok kentucky
This is both Southern solidarity and Texan/Non-Texan hostility
Important question: Has the wizarding world discovered vaccines and is Hogwarts vaccinated?
Circa Seventh Book
Hermione: Has the wizarding world discovered vaccines?
Ron: A wax what?
Hermione: hmmmm
Harry: Hermione, we cant take out the death eaters with a genetically magicked disease
Hermione: No I know that. Of course I know that.
*Uncomfortably long silence*
Harry: What if we gave them all smallpox
Hermione: HARRY NO! We already eradicated it once, let's not make the world do it again
Harry: Oh yeah, I guess you're right
Hermione: Now tuberculosis, on the other hand...
Hermione: If Voldemort likes the good ole' days so much, why don't we bring them back? Old society, old war tricks
Hermione, putting on a gas mask: New plan. We take them out with consumption and mustard gas
Hermione, to Voldemort: Did you know, historically, a majority of war deaths come from disease?
Harry Potter and the Violation of the Geneva Convention
penis katana
and getting caught in the rain
