@literalbirdboy / literalbirdboy.tumblr.com
The remake reboot prequel sequel industrial complex is killing me but the good thing is I don't have to watch any of that. I can just think "that sounds boring or otherwise doesn't interest me in any way" and do something other than watch it
"They're making a willy wonka origin story with timothee chalamet," you might say to me. "They're doing a live action the last airbender again, didn't you love avatar?" I don't find it necessary. This is nothing to me
Vaxildan 🐦⬛
Sure sex is great but have you ever read a fanfic by an incredible author and then realized they have 30+ other fics in the tag?
The thing about Cottagecore is that is a fetishized aesthetic of country life, divorced from labor and idealized by a primarily urban audience with a backward looking ethos of tradition. They are not prepared for the stresses of a rural life: farming; harvesting; tapping pumpkins to ensure none of them have been replaced with flesh; losing out on income by having to use one of your pigs in a blood sacrifice to paint protective sigils over your doors and windows; checking cracks and chimneys for the flesh-vines of the Pumpkin Lord; having to decide, before the Growth is complete, whether that's really your tradwife or an amassment of vines, leaves, and blood in the shape of your tradwife; ignoring their desperate pleas that "I'm me! No! No!" as you burn them alive, realizing too late you picked wrong; and the exploitative corporate nature of commercial farming in 2024. All seen through a deeply colonial lens, of course
When I made this post I did not expect it to be an effective test of which Tumblr users actually read a post fully before reblogging, and yet
funniest fucking storyline in 911 by FAR is michael getting bored, so he starts spying on his neighbors. athena gets worried and sends bobby over who IMMEDIATELY supports michael's insane claim that his one neighbor is up to something hinky. michael's partner comes home and suggests they rummage through the trash for evidence. despite his obviously joking bobby and michael think this is a GREAT idea. bobby gives david a lecture about how this is a legal grey area. michael sneaks into the guy's apartment and gets hit in the head. athena comes by and is outraged, even though she probably should have known that sending her dumbass husband to her dumbass ex-husband would result in smth exactly like this.
and then they're RIGHT. just completely validated. it's great. i could watch this episode forever.
Do I actually want to write this fanfic or do I just want to wallow in the delicious daydream like a pig in the mud?
Unfortunately I wish for others to wallow in my magnificent mud pit
If you see this you’re legally obligated to reblog and tag with the book you’re currently reading
"We're gonna be happy, Lex. You and me. We're gonna have the best life, Lexie, you and me. We're gonna be so happy."
ABOUT ME MEME: [7/∞] Favorite Ships Mark Sloan and Lexie Grey — Grey's Anatomy (2005-)
when I was in high school my dad was speeding like crazy because I was running late to my job at the cemetery. and the cop who pulled him over gave him three whole tickets because who the hell goes 95 in a 25??? but then, when my dad went to court the cop didn’t show, and so the judge looked over at the charges and just couldn’t believe it. he thought the cop must’ve been so racist that he made it up because who the hell goes 95 in a 25? so my dad got all 3 tickets dismissed bc of racism. that he didn’t even experience because he was in fact going 95 in a 25.
to clarify. my dad used to be a cab driver in ny and he also grew up in india so he just drives like a dickhead.
Apparently there was some kind of race scheduled at a local park or something so I've been trying to avoid the main trail but a little while ago when I had to cross near it I overheard the following shouted exchange
And goddamn if that didn't rewire my brain a little bit.
Last place is still a place, baby.
I know of a trail racing company that gives the slowest racer who finishes every race a DFL award: Dead Fucking Last. I was a little taken aback by this until I had it explained to me that those last-place finishers are pretty much uniformly people for whom finishing at all was an accomplishment: people undergoing cancer treatments, absolute beginners, runners in their eighties, extremely pregnant people, you get the idea. Moreover, what you see as this person crosses the finish line is all these sporty trail racers, many of whom finished the race literal hours earlier, cheering their hearts out because they respect that, yes, DFL is still a place, baby.
Steve Harrington + Underrated Shots
i think i just stumbled into a new fave aver piece of art but i cant find a title...
look at this! the textures! that smile! the softness! its a fucking chocolate ad! (piece by al parker from what i can find)
I'm not a prayin' man, but the night I found out my at-the-time-fiancé had been sending sex horny nasty horny sex asks to my friend on THIS VERY WEBSITE, I sat in the car in the parking lot of an abandoned church and watched a family of deer play in the snow, and it didn't quite feel like a sign because that part of Pennsylvania was mostly deer and abandoned buildings and snow, but it felt nice, and once the tears stopped, I looked down at my phone and my other friend had sent me a text that said, "HE'S TRYING TO CHEAT ON YOU ON THE ONE DIRECTION IMAGINES WEBSITE?" and I realized that life is all about your curated experience. A real choose-your-own-adventure deal. I have never seen someone post about One Direction on here in my life.
Certain words can change your brain forever and ever so you do have to be very careful about it.
