Did you ever just feel so lucky for knowing someone you met online? Like.. I was one click away from not following you. I was one second away from never even knowing of your existence.I would never have been this happy!!!...
Whats your social security number?
Jokes on you I don't have one, American
I'm not American I just assumed you were
Honestly this is the funniest outcome tho
Being American is the worst thing you could possibly ascribe to me how dare you
How do you think *I* felt when you called me American back???
I'm so sorry,,,..,, you're free to kill me if you wanna 😭
Awww
*Me doing the dishes*: This so housewifecore of me. I bet the tradwifes are so jealous of me right.
Exactly breastie
headpats
commission for TheLeafyLad
Me! Nya nya
prob gonna tell my mum and my sister i'm bisexual tomorrow, wish me luck ✌️
tonight is the night
update: i failed to tell anyone
another update: i texted my sister and apparently both she and our mum are both also bi???
bro what
Pog pog pog
put a bullet in my head.
....watchers
Lolmayo
one of the kids at my job calls queer people 'el jibbity' and i think it's adorable
this lil dude is cishet, but he's so respectful and always asking me the meanings of queer flags and what order the colors go in so he can color them for me and his friends
he'll eat homophobes, he loves learning about queer people and their experiences, and is active with his support and vocal in his defense of our community. he'll smile in joy when i tell him about new 'el jibbity lore' or when one of the other kiddos tells him of their queerness. a ten year old. i make sure he knows he's loved and appreciated by us el jibbities.
in the most aggressive voice a ten year old boy can muster, he voices his support for the 'el jibbity' community (not even sure where he heard of the el jibbity meme) and i think all allies should be like that.
i think that's what humanity should be like. a little silly, childlike and wonderful, curious, and supportive.
this new generation of children is something else
Awwwww
what was the point of any of these tags
I think I just pressed 3 of my most used tags and didn't think after that, sorry
People say Celeste is the trans video game but every transfem I've talked to seems to only want to play Risk of Rain 2
BUT I LIKE CELESTE. BLINGUS
I could never become a sailor. If I saw a massive kraken attacking my ship I would rub my face along its tentacles as my crewmates die around me and I get dragged into the sea with a massive erection
what the fuck mika
You drink piss shut your mouth and let me fuck a kraken in peace
*squirts my ink all over your little face* what if i am the kraken
Please mark me with your virile ink~~ Let the suction cups of your tentacles leave all sorts of hickeys on me and you caress my every surface~~~ ❤️
I mean... I-i wouldn't like that n-no... 👉👈
mmm, I'm totally going to undress you with my tentacles and cover your body~ Playing with every nook and cranny I can find~
Please use me as you wish~~ Make me yours and leave your marks all over me~ You're free to explore my entire body~~~~
Damn my crew is still not here to rescue me. What a bother~
sorry, your crew is gone because I wanted you all for myself sugar plum~ Besides, did you really want an audience?~ *slithers my tendrils up your crack and around your cock*
N-no maybe not actually~~ Gosh I can barely move under your grasp~~! I'm completely vulnerable to you~
I-i mean t-they should be here soon, right? ...right...
I...uhm...I...uhuh...yeah.
My name is w4nderingdreamer now. I have assumed her identity! Nya hah ha! Uhh. Brazil Brazil! Mhm! @w4nderingdreamer
did i tell u guys i got into an argument on twitter bc i said foxes are dogs and someone tried to bring up their actual fuckin. classification or whatever and i just said “foxes are dogs cause they are fluffye” and they kept arguing with me. the entire time i was like “you will not survive the immigration to tumblr you are lucky we are not there right now”
This is especially funny because they aren’t even right. Foxes *ARE* dogs.
No they aren’t.
yes they are. because they are fluffye.
OK yes they are.
Dog
Different family, but same order as @pictures-of-dogs
No, they are the same family. They are the same kingdom, phylum, order and family. They separate at the genus.
They’re a dog.
yeah they’re fluffye
theyre literally not dogs theyre not even fluffy. can we get science tumblr over hear or what!?
checkmate athiests
fluffye
okay but they literally are dogs, for those who are confused
If foxes are dogs, then so are wolves, coyotes, dingoes, jackals, and several other extant and extinct species.
Behold! A dog.
of course it’s a dog you buffoon. it’s fluffye.
Why on earth would someone think “BUT IF THEY’RE DOGS SO AR -”
Like yes of course wolves are dogs, where have you been. Jackals are excellent doggies! So are coyotes. Why is this confusing.
I love that this is literally two completely different arguments running simultaneously.
That guy up there who said they’re not even fluffy was thinking of sharks
sharks are also dogs. ravenous water dogs, but still dogs
Sharks can NOT be dogs they are SMOOTH
Tags via @jenroses
Sharks are NOT smooth they are spikey scaly pointy
well, sharks are smooth if you pet them one way, they are spiky, pet the other.
Seals are also dogs. They’re fluffye in a smooth way
Foxes are Canada?
