CAPTION: I get lots of messages asking for advice on * COMING OUT * But honestly… I don’t know what to say. I don’t want to give reckless advice that could possibly endanger someone, like (”Always follow your heart!”). There are so many factors to consider, like: Will coming out make me a target at school? Will coming out put me in danger at home? Will my family/friends understand? Will I be welcomed in my own community? Will I stay in the closet forever? Is it worth it? I can’t answer that for you. 

It’s also important to know that coming out is an unending process. Strangers, distant family, new friends, coworkers, crushes… every decision to share or not to share becomes a calculated gamble. Please know there is no shame in choosing not to come out. Your safety and well-being comes first. Your identity is still true whether anybody knows about it or not. I wish I could keep you all safe.

Coming out is a personal decision, and there’s no problem with waiting if coming out will make you unsafe or uncomfortable.

Read Reflections on Coming out to a Parent to hear the experiences of someone who has done it!