MASTERPOST: Everything You Need To Know About Living Independently for the First Time

On leaving home for the first time:

On basic finance:

On managing your household:

On feeding and caring for yourself:

On maintaining relationships:

On starting your career:

So where’s Garcia and Morgan? Are they finally having that love child?

CRIMINAL MINDS — 10.02 “BURN”

sun princess

After reforming Dan, Danny gets it into his head that he can reform Pariah Dark too. He takes a break from his kingly duties to go down to Earth. Both as a way to teach Pariah the wonders of humanity and to make sure Dan has actually changed his ways.

I’m quite enjoying the vibes with all of this.

Pariah would absolutely be viewed as one of the eccentric and VERY grumpy grandpas. So, him saying concerning stuff in front of people not in the know? Most just brush it off. That’s just grumpy grandpa words. Magic sensitive people- on the other hand- are sweating bullets every time. They don’t know what he is but they’re certain that he could go through with a lot of that stuff, and they don’t know what’s stopping him.

I imagine that Dan makes full use of a resting death glare to keep all but the most persistent from approaching him when he’s not feeling friendly. Reformation doesn’t mean he has to be nice. Just no hurting people physically.

And Danny? He’s getting a nice vacation, putting Pariah on a path to reformation, getting to check in on Dan, cause a bit of chaos, and possibly focus on catching everything he missed school wise from the years after becoming Phantom. He doesn’t even have to worry about hero stuff because Ellie decided to try her hand at it while he was on vacation!

I absolutely would love to imagine that the house they get is even in a slightly spookier position than every other house. Not too noticeably, just little things creating a spooky vibe and such. Maybe the angle of the house, or how much the trees creep up with more gnarled roots. Maybe it’s how the lighting hits the house and makes it seem just slightly off, or how the area near the foundation of the house collects mold much easier than the other houses. Just little things that make the house seem spookier, mixed with a little family of three who seem normal enough, but always can be found at the center of some spooky stuff.

(And if we have Clockwork visiting to check in on them from time to time, then I can imagine the neighborhood viewing Clockwork and Pariah as Dan’s divorced fathers)

Which is why I think it would be hilarious if some YJ or JL members know this family from the neighborhood perspective while the JLD have a whole “Okay, two destructive spirit things living with a sorta maybe protective spirit thing. Alright, this is fine, this is totally fine. Why is a protective spirit living with two clearly not so protective spirits?” And the only reason they don’t ask is because said protective spirit seems dedicated to both innocents and those two other spirits, and the JLD would rather not loose their new emergency, heavy-hitter contact by asking. And then have those perspectives forcibly clashed for something or the other.

Oh I have so many family headcanons my friend.

I feel as though Danny and Dan would both try to get Pariah to interact with the older folks of the neighborhood (for different reasons. Danny wants Pariah to socialize a bit. Dan just wants to watch Pariah have to play nice, he’s enjoying the minor expression changes that give away how he feels). But like, eventually Pariah (after gets over how embarrassing it is) introduces some really old games to the old folks and gets to experience the games again after so long of not having anyone to play them with. No, he will not say that he’s enjoying wasting his time with these pitiful mortals, it’s just that… he has found that it has provided a good refresher for some games. Nothing more. Stop giving him that look Dan!

I also imagine that, whenever someone in the neighborhood needs a hand with some sort of heavy lifting or a quick repair for something, they are directed to Dan. He may give numerous, scathing remarks and comments, but the job is always done well and he always stumbles over himself whenever complimented on it (he knows to expect it at this point, but it still catches him off guard). He’s basically the neighborhood’s “tough outside, soft inside” guy at this point, and he resents that that’s his reputation, but he’s been yet to try and change in.

Danny, unlike the other two, isn’t really covering up his ghostly nature, so a lot of people feel like they’re the person in the opening scene of a horror movie when they see him alone. It’s kinda just become a known quirk and the neighborhood just assumes it’s some sort of minor meta ability or something.

I have more, but I’m about to pass out so I’m posting this now-

Pariah is indeed slowly forming a mini clique. He’ll have a realization one day that he’s the pseudo leader of this clique of elderly that go out of their way to learn really old games. Probably from Danny jokingly calling him the King of Fallen/Ghost/Dead/something Games. Then follows a looney toons esc plot line of Pariah trying to “expand his territory” (get more people to play the old games with him and his group) with Dan and Danny just watching from the distance, questioning if this does follow the reformation stuff or not.

Also, yeah. I imagine that Danny is actively treating this all as a vacation and is therefore not at all caring about reigning in his ghostliness. No GIW, no ghost hunters, just nice ol’ neighbors around. This place ain’t Amity Park after all. Dan and Pariah, on the other hand, were told to try connecting with humans and such, so, tactically, acting more human than ghost would work better, yes?

Just, shenanigans.

For more shenanigans, they could be somewhere like Central City, Coast City, or Smallville where the uncanny tint to their normality would slowly be noticed more and more or in Fawcett City where their normality is actually weird. And just have the three not noticing all the superhero and supervillain stuff happening. Just, an attack is happening and these three are just chatting away while drinking tea (Pariah)/coffee (Danny & Dan), not even paying any mind to the weird cosplayers doing some sort of routine outside (until Danny is approached by JLD. Then, Danny just keeps quiet and let’s Pariah and Dan think that they’re all living on a world with an oddly high number of cosplayers who do whole routines. It’s more entertaining now to watch the separate perspectives of both sides).

(Why wouldn’t Pariah and Dan realize? Well they’re too focused on their “connect with humans” tasks to put together that the humans on this world aren’t all normal, baseline humans. They’re focused in on the lives of the character they created for themselves, and nothing short of the apocalypse will break that focus)

So like, just genuine lack of concern towards dangerous situations endears this family of three to some heroes (in a “oh no oh no, gotta keep these people alive”) vs “hmm, not feeling any threats. Must be a larping routine or play fight of sorts. Back to what I was saying” vs “Day ___ of Dad and Gramps not realizing that those aren’t planned routine scenes, and heroes be loosing their minds over thinking they’re in danger”.

Danny and JLD have a whole bet running on when the main JL or Gramps and Pops will notice the other ain't normal. Will the ghosts notice first? Or the heroes realise they are not in danger? How long is it gonna take? What about the teen Leaguers? Just the amount of bets they have running. They have a board.

Danny keeps a list of all the incidents they have been near and updates the JLD on everything so they can update the books. They are having a great time! Captain Marvel was read in so he doesn't ruin it. He's also having a great time.

Also? Danny getting to be the spooky meta kid? I love that for him. He's just the kid of Mr next door. You know? Acts like an ass, but will help anyways? Yeah his kid. Don't mind how the shadows act round him. He can't help it.

And the elderly? Are having so much fun. Playing all these historical games. And they get to compare kids and grandkids. It ain't fair Mr Dark! You got your boy and his living with ya! How'd you get such good kids? Threaten to destroy the world of left alone? You know???

Yeah. At this point, the JLD have log books describing each incident in detail, a day counter, and each close call caught on both sides. After they learnt that the reason the three were on Earth together was for the rehabilitation of two of them and vacation for the third. So far, pretty good rehabilitation, if the notable bonds with normal humans are any indicators (and the obliviousness to the whole super stuff). The teen Leaguers definitely set up betting boards. They’re vague enough that JL members can pass by and be told that it’s just some JLD bets about a scenario. It’s literally just JL or Ghosts with numbers and bet amounts under. Danny’s made a bet. He’s under the JL side as DP with $20 on it.

Also, Captain Marvel being let in on it is great. If he could afford it, he’d probably join the bets. Somehow, this leads to Billy Batson getting invited to the Dark household. He’s pretty sure Danny didn’t sus his identity out, so how did he end up here? (Fenton Luck, that’s how)

Danny can absolutely help it, but he won’t. Seeing no one react to it often makes him pretty happy cause “Wow, the people of this world are pretty chill”, even after he learns about metas and how they probably think he is one.

“Threaten to destroy the world if left alone?” Pariah gets suspiciously anxious for a few moments after that comment because that’s really really close to the answer. But he channels to old person vibes he’s learnt and brushes the comments off with a chuckle, just saying that he raised his boy well and that Dan decided to keep an eye on him in his old age. When those around him don’t seem to notice anything off, he lets out a huff of relief, he really needs to practice control over his expression. Little does he know, someone noticed the anxiousness and is now just stuck with the confusion of wondering why Mr. Dark was so anxious at that.

Side note: I love that they’re straight up using their names. They’re not hiding their status at all on that base. Like, imagine imagine meeting a family legitimately named the exact same names of powerful, supernatural entities and one of them is genuinely just uncanny valley 24/7 while the other two sometimes loose that normality that is almost too normal. It would leave the supernaturally inclined wondering if it’s a coincidence, the literal powerful entities just deciding to take on mortal disguises, or some weird third option?

With Billy? Dan literally picked him up one day. Saw a sad wet, homeless teen and dragged him home for dinner. Just barged in, dropped Billy on a seat. "Found the kid in an alley. We're keeping him."

Billy of course already knows about the family. Knows that none of his enemies can harm them. And so is. . Cautiously hopeful about it. Danny helps him enrol online for school. Look kid might be a hero. But he deserves more. He absolutely covers for Billy. Dan and Pariah? Have no idea. Danny sussed him out within a week. Doesn't necessarily know which hero. But knows he is one. And he's gonna help him.

The JLD? Kind of love that this protection spirit is dedicated to reforming powerful supernatural entities. Means less work for them. And gives th m help if they need it. But kids on holiday. So they will respect that. But hanging out? Trading tips? Running bets? all just good fun.

And the neighbours get the joy of seeing big tall and grumpy adopting a homeless teen and good awww. Look how sweet! He's such a sweetheart for all his gruff!

Some of the elderly think Pariah is a retired villain who is being kept an eye on. Which... They aren't wrong. But since he's out of the life now? Eh who cares! I have games to win you know? Also, imagine the local community centre seeing this pack of elderly people getting way too invested in their games.

Danny is having a great time! This universe is great! He's even catching up on school while teaching his new little brother! And Ellie pops by sometimes with Jazz. Which is great.

I love the imagery. Just Dan holding Billy by the scruff of his shirt and being like “Looks like you have a new brother Danny. Do your social things, I guess.” He has no idea what he’s doing. He just saw a homeless teen who looked way too stressed and got tunnel vision.

And Danny’s quiet support? Beautiful. Just like, Danny explaining the different online schooling options and such. Also, I feel as though Billy’s hope would grow if/when Danny tells him “I know you’re a hero. Not sure which, but I know you’re one. If you need anyone to listen, I’m here. Dan and Gramps technically are as well, but they still haven’t even realized we’re in a world of supers. And I have $20 riding on the JL realizing the whole situation first.”

JLD just having slight meetups with Danny to make bets or share tips is great. And them respecting vacation time? And appreciating his dedication to reforming other entities? Yeah, Danny’s probably gonna make an impulse decision to give ‘em his summoning sigil. Not a complete one, more like a call, but still, it’s something that tells a good deal about him.

Dan is absolutely viewed as a softie under all his gruffness. He’d probably have some neighbors dropping advice from their own experiences adopting or fostering. There’s even more fawning over him being a softie after he backhanded some weird guy who was harassing his new son, to his confusion.

I absolutely adore that this clique of elderly are all like “Have an ex-villain as our pseudo leader or loose access to a well of information of ancient games that are very entertaining? Ex-villain as our pseudo leader it is!” They know the basis of things but they care more for the games that Mr. Dark brings.

Danny’s just having a great time. His Fenton Luck has been yet to strike in a bad way (as far as he’s aware). He’s in a world where people don’t give his powers a second glance, some other teens even think his ghostly traits are cool! He didn’t have to turn into ghost form for the general people to accept a little creepiness! And Dan & Pariah seem to be doing amazingly as well here! Things are looking good, all things considered.

Billy is super fucking confused. But happy about it. His new big bro? Is great. He's getting him caught up in essentials. And also teaching him useful shit? Billy has learned so much about practical physics! He knows where to kick a door to break it easier now! And how to tell if it's a load bearing wall. Things that are useful for school and for hero work! And he got given loads of new fighting moves? Yeah Danny is great. That he has a family he's knows are safe? Even better. Sure new Dad is an absolute ass. But he's nice and caring in his own way. And Gramps? Well, Danny says he's getting better. Batman is all for reforming villains right! So this is fine?

And yeah. Dan, Single DILF? All the single moms are lining up to flirt. And a few of the single dad's too. Dan does not know how to cope with that. And his kids? Just laugh at him. Why is he being considered attractive? The fuck? Help!?

And yeah. The elderly have their priorities straight. It's clear his kid and grandkids have been keeping him in the straight and narrow. So they don't wanna ruin a good thing. And these games are both fun. And historically valuable. They got interviewed by the local university! The college kids come over sometimes now. And it's nice to have youngsters about too!

JLD have a good thing going here. And they are not gonna ruin that by posing off the protection spirit! Not to mention, the two he's reforming? Their auras alone on this plane? Have scared off so many threats. Constantine laughed himself sick when a demon appeared, sniffed the air and fled in fear. Earth is safer than ever on the supernatural front purely because they chose to holiday here!

Also, they can't wait to see who wins the bets. This is the most fun they've had in ages!

the most unrealistic thing about the barbie movie to me is just how many kens there were in barbieland. no one had that many kens. if there are 100 barbies in barbieland we should be looking at like 5 kens max. of course i love the spectacle of dozens of kens beaching each other off but really that whole scene probably should have just been a ryan gosling and simu liu angrily scissoring

Wait for it.

WAIT. Sound ON and WAIT

I love character development.

That’s what fathers are for

Day six of Ranger’s Apprentice Month: Dad!Halt

Halt helps Will remember he is loved.

After the third day, Halt broke. He knocked on the closed door, but instead of waiting for the reply he now knew wouldn’t come, he pushed it open. Will was laying on the bed wrapped up in a quilt. His eyes were open but unfocused as he stared blankly at the wall across from him. He didn’t acknowledge Halt walking into his room, not even when he sat besides him on the bed and started to rub his back.

crowley + text posts bonus:

some Absolute Looks™

the comic (#1890)

imagine you're in a timeloop and everything goes exactly the same every time, except for a random user that just posts completely differently each loop. sometimes they don't post at all. they never post about the timeloop, though

during one loop you message them to ask if they know what's going on and they immediately block you and go back to posting

I love that amid the stress of being caught in a temporal paradox you are checking tumblr dot com

nothing better to do

twitter, food, and dumb asses

agree to pay your workers fairly and the strikes will end, it’s that easy you greedy shits!

More and more I am thinking that the reason the studios are refusing to budge is because any deal other than the workers unconditional surrender would require the studios to make streaming numbers public so workers know what fair pay is, and companies have been lying about streaming numbers so much that making the real numbers public could result in lawsuits and possible criminal charges from the investors they've defrauded.

There has been an outpouring of public support for unions the past few years I don't think the execs would refuse to even make a counter offer unless there was more going on.

*takes a deep breath*

When I was 7 years old I hated that Zack and Cody were no longer at the hotel. I didn't like the new show at first and belive me I was complaining about it for weeks.

And now you're telling me that the reason behind it was Disney's greed?

obi wan: we're engaged

cody: IN COMBAT

again.

they are trying