my roommate who is like. the most straight laced cis dude ever. just came into the living room and said "the masculine urge to get pregnant." then stood there for a second before leaving silently.
You’re doing what to your roommate??
thinking abt how fucked up steam engine boiler explosions can look. theyre just pipes under there
gives me the idea of a ghost/monster engine that looks normal, albeit a bit battered, only to swing their smokebox door open and a myriad of pipes come bursting out like fucked up tentacles
I didn’t know a train could be an eldritch horror, but here we are.
The Call of C'thchoochoo.
Shout out to the cashier at Aldi that made me and my wife malfunction
What a year this week has been.
It’s Monday.
It sure as hell is.
The earlier in the day Monday you reblog the funnier this gets
i miss vhs tapes and cds i miss feeding my computers and tvs yummy treats. now theyre eating nothing. theyre being born without mouths
I feel like any mad scientist who creates their own lover in a lab has carte blanche to let their freak flag fly and go overboard with the trimmings, embuing their creation with any and all the traits they’ve ever found sexy. It is that mad scientist’s project and they go in eyes wide open, the ethics of creating of a living thing for the sake of personal gratification notwithstanding.
But! Imagine the mad scientists who create a creature or a monster and accidentally fall in love with it. You could never have another moment’s peace for fear that you have, all this time, been telegraphing all the kinks you didn’t know you had to God and everyone. How could you ever trust your motives again? Suddenly your entire career of scientific inquiry is shadowed by the spectre of your unconscious thirst.
Monster: Master, why have you given me these very strong limbs and sharp sharp claws and powerful large bones? Did you set out to make me hideous in the eyes of humankind?
Scientist: Of course not! You have those because you’re my masterpiece, the pinnacle of evolutionary achievement. You alone are the perfect consummation of high intelligence and a supra-natural variety of traits that permit of survival on this planet. The Creator Himself had not prepared Adam as perfectly as I have prepared you, and I will lead you through this fallen world over which you shall stride like an old god, powerful and keen and darkly resplendent. Small-minded fools have yet to understand the standards of beauty that true efficiency and prowess represent.
Monster: And this second smaller mouth inside my regular mouth, Master? Or the substantial ruff that sticks out proudly from my broad chest?
Scientist: So you can lie in wait for your prey in the depths of the ocean. And remain warm in the frozen tundra in the event that you should be cast out there. There is no environment, however hostile, that you cannot rule.
Monster: Fair, but then why did you draw out my anatomy charts in a series of beefcake poses?
Scientist: Because y
Scientist:
Scientist:
Scientist: ………………………………Hang on.
[Curb Your Enthusiasm theme rising softly over the distant hills]
Scientist: ………..why……….did I?
In a world of dirty food courts, I'm one of the rare FEW who returns my tray to the slot above the trash and cleans up all my trash. SHARE THIS POST if you're attracted to women
I've been scream laughing at this for several days
the first time i ever saw this video it made me spit out my drink all over my desk which is somewhat ironic considering the content of this video
