I’m camping and have taken a break from everything in hope that when I get home it’ll help jumpstart my metabolism and weight loss again. I have been eating so much though, I feel like it was a very bad idea. I’m afraid I’m going to go home and see that I gained 10lbs in three days. This sucks!
TW/ED Ugh! I ate so much food today (less than “normal”
amount) because I was around my partner. Eating more makes me crave more too. I ended up purging some of it.
I’m going camping later today and have been trying to figure out how to avoid all of the food. It’s stressful when it should just be mostly relaxing.
My partner said, try taking the weekend off.
We were like, hell no! Do you know how much that might set me back? SMH
Went to breakfast with my partner at a new place. It doesn’t have nutritional content listed. It made me so anxious. This is what happens when you try to pretend to be “normal”
Down another 2lbs. That’s down 28lbs overall I’m even on my period
Down 2 More lbs. Yay! That’s 26 down since June 5
I feel like I’m totally F*CKED! Things are not going according to plan.
TW: ED/ SH
We tried not to p urge, but it happened. Then the carving into our flesh also happened, reminding us that we are always FAT and need to strive for perfection no matter what. It will reflect in the mirror to keep us always pining for the ultimate goal.
Taking care of beauties like this help me get my steps in
"Starving yourself can make you feel euphoric, like a drug addict or an alcoholic. It's not about thin enough, right? there's no thin enough. It doesn't exist. What you crave is the numbing of the thing you don't want to feel."
it’s when you reach that point where it’s all high highs, the number keeps on getting lower and lower and people are starting to get worried. you’re running on empty and it’s perfect. you can push yourself to do more. only burning 100 calories? why not 1000? why not more? you feel euphoric because you’re so obsessed with your goal that everything else is pushed out of your mind. eating doesn’t feel good anymore, you just feel guilty and bloated. everything your mind wants to consume is food related or thinspo, you can’t focus on anything else. you think about your ED obsessively and incessantly, you make lists and you manifest and you do whatever it takes in order to lose it. You cut off people who say you’re toxic or too skinny or are suspicious of your actions because they don’t really care about you, they care about how you’re behavior will affect them. you watch movies and shows that promote starving and dieting, and you read books with it in them too. you buy clothes knowing you’ll be able to fit in them if you lose a little more and that new goal pushes out any doubts or bad feelings about it. any wrongdoings of others are gone. you feel nothing but happy and euphoric as all of this happens. you are weightless, tethered to no stone. when you move, you are being blown by the wind and you are driven by your hunger. you are the thinnest person you know, and you love that fact. you are thin limbs wired in a porcelain frame. people envy you, but only in secret because if anyone knew, they’d be called a bad person. people worry about you, but they wanna be you. you are weightless. you are thin. you are 100 pounds soaking wet. people can throw you with ease. you. are. weightless.
that problem with my ed is that somedays i want to recover and the next day i want to starve like bitch pick a side
Just checked and we’re down another .45kg/1lb Not a lot, but it’s something. 10.45kg/ 23lbs down now
TW ED focused- I recently started back to my old habits. Started restricting more June 5, with lots of exercise. Now I’m down (10 kg) 22 lbs. The last couple weeks feel like they have been so slow for weight loss. I’m going to throw in some lifting so that I can burn more and change my shape. I am determined to do this. We will reach our goal!
Big text to remind me what I found on TUMBLR to keep my ed diet
- Some excuses to not eat whe I am with people around (from @ana-girl0) - "Sorry but I am not hungry" - "Sorry but I don't like this ___ food" - "Oh I ate a very big breakfast this morning and I am still full" - " I have a stomach ache" - "I will eat at home to save on money" - "Sorry I am busy right now, I have to go for something important" - " My doctor put me on a special diet so I can't go and eat at the restaurant"
- Some motivation quotes (@4n4-m14 @blndsundoll4cbale) - What you eat in private, you wear in public - Don't reward yourself with food, you are not a dog - You are in control. You have the control - You are not hungry you just bored - Skip dinner, wake up thinner - Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels -They don't care unless you'r skinny enough - Don't binge it's cringe - No Food no binge - Eat for the body that you want, not for the body you have -Junk food you have craved for an hour or a body you have craved for a lifetime ? it's your choice ! - Think it, want it, Get it - Feeling cute even when I am dressed in sweats - Being able to wear tiny tank tops - My face slimming out - Finally being the skinny friend (what a goal) - People asking me how I lost weight - People talking to me more and worried a bit for me at least - Getting drunk/higher quicker - Pretty priviliege - Taking cute instagram photo
- Ed shows : (desac) - To the bone - 13th - girl interrupted - Starving on suburdia - Pretty little liars - my skinny sister
May add more in the futur
-Perfect body
-Secret between friends
-center stage
Always working to lose the weight! Nothing will stop us!