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Panicked Situations

@lets-fucking-gander

Fellow Pessimist.
Long Island, New York
A 22 year old grandma trying her best

Indiana Bones.

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Indiana Bones

This is the heroic doggo that Henry Jones Jr took his name from

Very good at finding treasure…. and then taking it somewhere else, and burying it again….

“IT WILL BE SAFE HERE”

“THIS ARTIFACT… IT BELONGS IN A YARD!!”

“It’s being examined by Good Boys”

“But….”

“G O O D

B O Y S”

did nasa just forget bi and lesbians exist or did they ask them beforehand..would they that…i just..what..

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its because they don’t want people getting pregnant on space missions, the article is badly written scissoring in space is to be expected and respected

Reblog if you support wlw astronauts getting it on at 0 gravity

In space no one can hear lesbians scream

Not to be gay on main.... But all I want is to live in a small medieval town. I'm the town baker. My bakery is my home and I'm always wearing an apron and covered in flour.

Nextdoor is a forge, and I am very close with the blacksmith that works there. Every morning I bring him a freshly baked loaf of bread. As I hand it to him our hands touch briefly. His hands are rough, yet they're so careful and gentle with everything he touches. I secretly want him to be that gentle with me.

One day, he walks into my bakery, he's still sweaty from the intense heat of the forge. In his hands is a small dagger in it's sheath. He hands it to me and tells me it's to protect myself if needed.

I take the dagger out of it's sheath. It's beautifully made. There are intricate designs engraved into the metal. It's so much more complicated than anything else yeah blacksmith has ever made. It must've been so time consuming to make.

I look up at him and with just one look I understand why he's giving it to me. With one look we both understand that we love each other. He leans in and kisses me. It's so soft and sweet, and gentle.

He comes by every day to get a loaf of bread and kiss me. We keep our relationship a secret. And everyone wonders why neither of us have found wives. But we know exactly why. And we're completely content with being secret lovers.

Is that really too much to ask?

Anonymous asked:

I may never recover from finding out today that Winona Ryder married Keanu Reeves while filming in Romania in 1992 and legit does not know if it was legally binding or not,,, 25 years later and she’s just like lol idk

I BEG YOUR PARDON

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ABSOLUTELY NOTHING COULD HAVE PREPARED ME FOR THIS

FINALLY SOME GOOD FUCKING JOURNALISM

They brought in an actual priest to perform the ceremony for the film. The priest told them that the ceremony was legally binding in Romania and he would have to divorce them the next day. Due to the filming schedule, though, they never had a chance to have the priest come back and annul the wedding.

What… in the fuckery