entertheaardvark-deactivated202
I’m so sorry has everybody seen this bots of new york
vampireapologist-archive-deacti
My kink is cooking in front of my friends who know which knife is made for what and forcing them to watch me use the wrong one for the wrong thing
Use a cheese grater for tomatoes.
You’ll burn in hell for this.
*panting outrageously: I GOT HERE AS FAST AS I COULD
Oh my god, my friend who used to rent a room from me would routinely use a small ass paring knife to chop entire very large onions instead of a chef’s or santoku despite the fact that my kitchen is well stocked with many varieties of knives. In fact, he’d use the same tiny paring knife to cut everything when he would cook; be it veggies, or meat, or whatever. He didn’t want to dirty too many knives…? It drove me fucking nuts because he almost cut himself quite a few times trying to chop things that were too large for such a small blade. Nothing I said would change his mind. Graaahhhhh….
see the thing is i do the opposite. Do I own a gorgeous little set with a Santoku, utility, and paring knife? yep.
caN I PEEL POTATOES AND POTENTIALLY OPERATE WITH A CHINESE CLEAVER???
you’re gonna see me try
solarecho
i just bring a fucking machete to the kitchen. none of this fancy cutlery stuff. i shall engage my food in ruthless combat
i need you to roll for initiative
ah fuck i rolled a 1
the celery gets to go first and just fuckin decks you
ok so the first step is to write the Cuisine and Cutlery: Player’s Handbook. i can help, here’s the cover art, just gotta get the title calligraphied on there
i think the rules should be pretty easy, it’s just knife facts and tables of fruits
this is the dumbest goddamn thing ive ever spent an hour on holy fucking shit i was laughing at it the whole fucking time
Reblogging for the ugly as shit kitchen safe shoes. Like, bar none, ugliest shoes I’ve ever worn.
kitchencombatconcept
right???????
kitchencombatconcept
FINAL DEVELOPMENT TO THIS POST:
p1
p2
the drift in pacific rim is basically submitting to the mortifying ordeal of being known and that’s why we all went feral over it
being able to pilot a giant robot and punch monsters is a much more tangible reward than being loved.
just saw a "only one bed" fic with the major character death warning
“This bed ain’t big enough for the both of us.”
Hi i found these ominous items at goodwill today, love the collection u have going here
Idk who this lady is and the other pic is just a piece of cardboard with a plastic cover ?
ITS JOUMAMA
top ten posts that Activate michiganders
au where when darth vader declares that he’s Luke’s father Luke comes to the (entirely reasonable) conclusion that darth vader and anakin skywalker were married
“How could you kill your HUSBAND?!” and Luke gets away with his hand because Anakin’s too confused trying to figure out when he and Obi Wan got married and why he’s only learning about it now
gays dress like everyone from Jurassic Park tbh
Fair point
desaturated7-deactivated2021090
is your razor fighting toxic masculinity? does harry potter support trans rights? are your sneakers racist? has triscuits released a statement about police brutality
What a great way to summarize my absolute exhaustion.
If Goldilocks tried three beds, then Momma Bear and Daddy Bear slept separately. Baby Bear is probably the only thing keeping the family together.
yomommaboyfriend
You ain’t have to put those people business out like that.
Y’know, the story straight-up tells us why Mama Bear and Papa Bear sleep in separate beds: they have very different needs in terms of mattress firmness, and those fancy responsive mattresses that can be soft on one half and firm on the other hadn’t been invented yet. There’s no shame in valuing your spinal health.
The fact that they’re secure enough to admit that they’re better off in separate beds probably indicates that they have a very healthy relationship built on a foundation of mutual love and respect.
cincosechzehn
their relationship was just right
“The great Jewish theologian Abraham Joshua Heschel once defined faith as primarily faithfulness to a time when we had faith. We remember these moments of heightened awareness in our lives, these clearings within consciousness in which faith is self-evident and God too obvious and omnipresent to need that name, and we try to remain true to them.”
— Christian Wiman, from He Held Radical Light: the Art of Faith, the Faith of Art (Farrar, Straus, and Giroux, 2018)
