Accepting character portrait commissions now! Feel free to DM me for more details :D
So the shower perch fell off the wall today and Mia got a bit more water than she bargained for
Mia would like the internet to know that she is now warm and dry
average marvel movies fan
Average American Liberal
"is this worker strike going to cause me unrest and discomfort as the labor i take for granted and do not respect is not being performed?"
update:
Mary Soon Lee, from Elemental Haiku: Poems to Honor the Periodic Table, Three Lines at a Time
The group chat has decided that since I've only had one sexual relationship and it wasn't a very good one and I've since transitioned, changed my legal name, undergone hormone therapy and now had bottom surgery, that I have ship of theseus'ed my way back to being a virgin
I'm having the weirdest fucking pride month
If you people start giving Hobie Brown the Eddie Munson effect I'm going to start killing. His ass would not be listening to arctic monkeys be so fr
I need to give tiktokers a seminar in comics and music
Ohhhhhkay. The really punk thing to do is not to let anyone tell you what you can and can't listen to.
ITS A MUSIC BASED SUBCULTURE
do you ever just
happy 10 year anniversary to this game changer thank u @joscribbles for your services
can’t believe it’s been 10 years since i learned to always put my name on my art, even if it’s just a shitpost, bc u never know what’s going to blow up
anyway here’s a signed version if you wanna use it to shut up people who are trying to tell you their Opinions
my dad took some ancestry tests and eventually found out who his father was (and that he has 5+ siblings who are also finding all of this out) and honestly it's been pretty bizarre and emotional so far, naturally
but one of the biggest changes for me is no longer having to give the whole spiel of "oh i know i'm racially ambiguos but hey there's a whole story behind it because this that and here's my father's backstory"
like no i... i just have a grandpa from Nigeria now
...that's way less mysterious >:(
The Least Intimidating bakery in the village has closed for good so now I’ve got to go to the Intimidating Bakery, it’s awful. If you don’t have a PhD in being French I don’t recommend going to that bakery, here’s the humiliating account of the 3 times I’ve visited it so far:
- the first time I went in there I pointed at one of those extra-skinny baguettes and said “a flute, please” feeling pretty sure of myself, and the baker said “… that’s a ficelle” (you idiot) (was implied) “a flute is twice as large as a baguette.”
- That’s insane, first of all, a flute is a skinny instrument. Call your fat baguette a bassoon, lady—I made some timid remark about how it would make more sense for a flute to be a skinny bread and the baker said, “In Paris it is. I thought you were from the South?”
- oh, that hurt
- I guess I’m from the part of the South that’s so close to Italy the bread’s waist size matters less than whether it’s got olives in it, but I left the bakery having an existential crisis over whether living in Paris had made me forget my roots
- the Least Intimidating Bakery just had normal baguettes vs. seedy baguettes vs. horny baguettes (easy mode, some have seeds, some have horns), while the new bakery has breads that are only different on a molecular level—there’s a good old loaf and then another, identical loaf called a bastard? google told me a bastard is “halfway between a baguette and a bread” but denouncing them like “those are not regulation-sized bastards” would get me banned from the bakery for life
- on my 2nd visit (while I stood in line discreetly googling baguette terminology) there was an English tourist who asked for a baguette while pointing at what was either a rustique or a sesame and I felt a bit worried for them, but the baker just clarified “this one?” to waive any responsibility if they found out later it wasn’t a classic baguette, then handed them the bread without educating them in a judgmental tone and I felt envious
- I know it’s because she thinks the English are beyond saving but still it made me want to come back with a fake moustache and an English accent so I wouldn’t be expected to play bakery on expert mode just because I’m French. I asked for a pastry this time and the baker asked “no bread with that?” which felt cruel, like she wanted me to sprinkle myself with ashes and admit out loud that my level of bread proficiency isn’t as advanced as I once believed it was
- The third time I went, I had lost all self-confidence and I hesitantly pointed at a bread and said “I’d like this, uh—what is it called?” and the baker looked at me in disbelief and said “That’s a baguette.”
- God.
- for the record, if that stupid bread had been flanked by a skinny bread (ficelle) and a fat one (flute) then yeah of course I would have known to call it a baguette, but in the absence of reference points I now felt lost and scared of being called a Parisian again
- it’s hard to express the depth of my suffering so I’ll just let the facts speak for themselves: this morning a French person (me) stood in a French bakery in France surrounded by French people and pointed at a baguette and said “what is this called”
If you wouldn't go to someone for advice, don't take their criticism either.
Wait whoa
op woke up and chose logic today and idk how i feel about that
Watch every Zelink fanartist ignore Link being shorter than Zelda for the second game in a row
Me when I'm in denial
There's something wrong with you people I think
I've been telling people in online games to "drink a glass of water" as an insult and it seems to destroy their will to hurl slurs or it makes them go beserk. I dont know why yet but my working theory is that it works like the melee style in Dune and gets through a shield made for faster, more energetic weaponry
I think my favorite bit i do with customers is when white women are like ‘i dont know what to getttttt’ and i hit them with the ‘you should be bad~ 😈’
Saying ‘you should be bad!!’ In like Gay Voice to a white woman at starbucks has like the same psychological impact as going like ‘who’s a good boy?’ To a dog. It makes them so excited in a really endearing way.
Anonymous asked:
what do you like about girls?
their evil ways
