awesome 👍

kids were roleplaying with minecraft figurines and one of them had their figure go up to the other and say “i’m in love with you” and the other one replied “sword slash to the chest. and you’re on fire”

also literally fucked a man so hard yesterday that today i found pieces of my bed on the floor

I read this too fast and thought it said “pieces of him on the floor”

rapidly unsheathes my katana and you immediately get a phone call from your wife asking for a divorce

absolutely fucked off this milk and cereal

i never knew that i was pirating anime and manga as a kid like i genuinely just thought it was free online

The generation gap between me and ppl of my own age

life tip: you can listen to a song on loop

I can't eat salad dude it's just a fucking bowl of ingredients

just needed to save these bc it's making me laugh

the fact that a river ends at the mouth implies that the source is the anus, and a river flows from anus to mouth

not for this one I don't think so

Obsessed with going "No... i shan't say..." when it's very clear what I shan't say

Cas: i love you 🥺

Dean (especially) for the past few days on tumblr dot com:

[ID: a newscaster on TV, sitting at a desk and holding papers with both hands while looking at the viewer. The words “breaking news” are written in all caps on the screen behind him. End ID]

Autism Blast

I dropped my phone in the shower and the water opened up instagram and changed my fucking PRONOUNS?????

just did a hit of pillow and blanky