CREATURE????
just when you think it couldn’t be worse, you have to battle a creature
I’m choosing to believe him because I think there should still be mystery and adventure in the world
Okay I looked this one up. He said he talked to God, made up some songs, and lost nine kilos during his 20ish hours in the water. He was also completely nude when he was rescued.
hero’s journey
and this man? Odysseus
he also ate some kind of stick
i spent an insane amount of time trying to make that gif on my phone lmao please validate me 🥲
BUCKET MAN - 300 POINTS - DOCILE IN NATURE BUT EASILY STARTLED. GREAT FOR BEGINNERS!
CAKE CATCHER - 800 POINTS - INCREDIBLY AGILE, MAKES A GREAT HUNTING COMPANION. HAS THE “PICKUP” ABILITY.
FALSE DEWEY - 1,000,000 POINTS - DO NOT ENGAGE THE FALSE DEWEY UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. FOR PROFESSIONAL HUNTERS ONLY.
a great part of speedrunning documentaries/docuseries on youtube on super niche/old games is the fact that, in most cases, the only people with enough in-depth knowledge to make the video in the first place are the top runners themselves. which results in really funny moments where the narrator is like "but in 2016, a new runner would blow the category wide open with a 3-minute time save... meeee :3 teehee"
Achievement Unlocked:
Get your meat sucked
I wish wizards were real so bad imagine coming out of a wal mart and seeing some guy with long robes and a big hat in the parking lot surrounded by wacky particle effects screaming some shit like "By the moon and the starlight, by the shield and the sword, I summon to me, my Honda Accord!" And then just getting into his car and driving off
me: “yeah I dated a guy in high school who came out as gay. it was before i knew i was a boy so needless to say it didn’t work out”
coworker: “damn dude was preordering”
other things this coworker (who is a cis guy) has done/said:
—got confused about why I’d never been a boy scout because he forgot i was trans
—told me he was gonna get top surgery scar tattoos to match me after i get mine
—laughs at all my trans jokes, even if they’re supremely unfunny
—calls me big dog (and him little dog) even though he is about as tall as two of me
— “I can’t believe she would say that transphobic thing to you. In June? Pride month?”
Once I said "My gender is whatever's funniest at the time" and my coworker stops dead in his tracks, turns slowly and says "So are your pronouns honk/honk?" killing me instantly
*crouches to go into stealth*
the cracking of my knees alerts the guards, I am immediately killed
one of my favorite images in the world ive saved it across 2 phones
I don't understand this at all but find it compelling nevertheless.
Sweet Adeline-singing motherfucker
