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Chaos Cat (loves this thing in particular)

@kyraneko / kyraneko.tumblr.com

Chaotic disaster human semi-successfully masquerading as a responsible adult. Or might be secretly several cats in a cloak. No promises.
Fan of stories in all their forms, especially fanfiction as an interactive, transformative medium that sometimes does violence to the original canon.
The author is dead and if they're not spinning in their grave at what you did to their stories, you're not trying hard enough.
Thinks fans deserve Harry Potter more than JK Rowling does and should get it in the divorce.
Also fan of Star Wars, the Locked Tomb, CATS the musical, Tomb Raider, Penny Dreadful, Lovecraft Mythos, fairy tales, folk tales, and a shitload of garbage 80's-90's-era sci-fi and fantasy.
Source of spontaneous fandom meta essays, shitposts, and the occasional fic, as well as the tendency to find something shiny about practically any subject under the sun (or above it, or including it). Yes, I reblog things in their gazillions all at once because the queue system has extra steps, bite me. Yes, my inbox is as abandoned and overgrown as Sleeping Beauty's tower, bite me some more.
Fiction is tagged In which I write. AU speculations and other things that may eventually become stories are tagged story building.

Two up, two down

We talk about Potter as a timeless series, as quills and parchment will never date, but there are a few key elements which are of their time, and I sometimes suspect that eventually, their original meaning may be lost.

Snape’s house in Spinner’s End is one of these.  If you visit Surrey, a house akin to Number 4 on Privet Drive can be found on hundreds of identical estates.  Indeed, the three-bedroom house with a garage, and both front and back gardens, situated on a private housing estate in leafy surburbia is one that most British people will have strolled through at some point.

But Snape’s house in Spinner’s End is the opposite of the Dursleys’ aspirational abode, and is somewhere that few modern readers will have seen in its original form with their own eyes.  Snape’s house in Spinner’s End is a traditional two up, two down through terraced house, mired deep in a maze of identical cobbled streets, overlooked by a looming mill chimney, and seemingly – by the 90s – entirely abandoned.

The difficulty that some may have in accurately picturing this scene is because these houses, in this state, no longer exist.  A large percentage of two up, two down terraces were demolished as part of slum clearance, which should tell you all that you need to know about the state of the houses.  

Those which remained have been extensively modified – usually knocking down the privy (outside toilet), and then building a two storey extension across the bulk of the yard to create a third room downstairs, and a bathroom upstairs.  Some houses only have a single extension; it is rather common in some areas of the Midlands to have a bathroom that leads off the kitchen downstairs – because the bathroom was the missing room, and it was cheaper to build one storey than two.

Pottermore had an article earlier in the year which explained how the filmmakers originally wanted to film on location, but could not, because the houses simply did not exist in their traditional state.

The houses were typically constructed with two rooms downstairs and two rooms upstairs with a tiny backyard entry leading to the outhouse. Craig actually considered shooting on location, but even though the buildings were intact, they had been brought into the modern era, with up-to-date kitchens and plastic extensions, so the set was built at the studio.

Throughout the 20th century, cobbled streets were routinely replaced by various other road surfaces, namely tarmac and asphalt – and, of course, the scarcity of cobblestones now means that such streets are aesthetically desirable.  However, the cobblestones in Spinner’s End are not an indication of affluence, but an indication of an area left behind. This is further illustrated by the rusted railings, the broken streetlights, and the boarded up windows.

These were workers houses, often funded by the owners of the mill, and therefore tied – meaning that rent was deducted from your wage before you received it.  There were benefits to being in tied accommodation, including being close to work and having a guaranteed landlord – but that was as much benefit to the mill owner as the worker.  Seeing great competition, some mill owners invested in their properties to entice workers – but Spinner’s End is not an example of this; Spinner’s End would’ve been regarded as little better than a slum even when fully occupied.

The narrow streets are indicative of when these houses were built, presumably in the late 1800s – cars were not a concern, and the attitude was to build as many houses on as small a piece of land as possible.

By the time the 90s roll around, and we see Narcissa and Bellatrix descend upon the street, Spinner’s End appears to be mostly deserted.  With the closure of traditional manual industries, families would be keen to relocate to where work could be found.  Estates which hadn’t already been cleared by the 60s would find themselves left to rack and ruin, their former occupants long gone – whether seeking a new life elsewhere, or having died.

For once, Bellatrix is not being anti-Muggle when she sneers at the Muggle dunghill; she is unnervingly accurate. It is a slum by her standards, but most importantly, it was a slum by everyone else’s standards as well.  By the time Severus was born, work should’ve been well under way to clear the area, or to renovate it.  This evidently did not occur – which itself explains how undesirable the area is; nobody wanted to spruce it up - they wanted to leave.  There were no jobs, no amenities, no services – and eventually, no people.

We often ponder why Snape remains at Spinner’s End, but perhaps there lies the answer; he wasn’t just hiding from the magical world, but he was also hiding from the Muggle world as well…

It always fucks me up when people and fanfictions ignore the fact that Snape was CANONICALLY born in a slum and lived his childhood in a slum. It is a part of his character that is so rarely explored in fics. Because from young Snapes’s point of view, even the Weasleys would have looked rich. And then he had to share dorms with people like Malfoys and Blacks. It just fucks me up.

The cycle of poverty that informs Snape’s behaviour and the classism inherent in the bullying that Snape experiences at Hogwarts are endlessly fascinating to me, and something that fandom as a whole does not take into account nearly enough.  I wrote once about the potential psychology behind Snape’s decision to remain in Spinner’s End, but this visceral – and historical – reminder of exactly how desperately poor the Snapes were is important.

Americans especially don’t have a native understanding of this – for Americans, these kinds of industrial slums were largely already a thing of the past by the 1950s, when America was experiencing a post-WWII economic boom.  This is not to say that no American in the 1950s was trapped in poverty, but overall American society was made richer by the war.  British society, on the other hand, was still recovering from wartime scarcity, rationing, and destruction, and industrial slums were still very much a part of its makeup.

The Snapes were poor in a way from which it was virtually impossible to escape.  The Snapes were not poor like the Weasleys, who are poor by wizarding standards but never go hungry and never live in literal filth.  The Snapes are poor by Muggles standards, by post-WWII Britain standards, by anyone’s standards.  The Snapes were the kind of poor that seeps into your pores at the earliest age and never leaves.  The kind of poor that informs almost everything about Snape, from his idolization of magical society, to the way he deals with social humiliation, to his arrogant rage masking a deep-seated self-hatred, and especially to his resentment of popular, loved, pampered, wealthy James Potter.

I saw a post a few months ago that talked about how Snape going to Hogwarts was almost analogous to a poor kid in the UK getting a scholarship in a really fancy public school (like Eton) due to his intelligence but then gets bullied by the richer kids because he’s not one of them. It is a comparison that I found very interesting because of course in some of these private schools kids can get scholarships and stuff but they never truly belong in that same social circle, i.e. they would never go on nice fancy holidays or school trips etc. It is certainly an interesting mirror of Snape always seemed to struggle fitting in Hogwarts due to his poverty and I feel like its something thats very specific to the British social class system

This is very true. My partner was one. He was sufficiently impressive at primary school to be scholarshiped into the posh private school. He was even moved up a year as he was truly gifted. And it was unmitigated hell for him. Kids he grew up with shunned him as a class traitor, for putting on airs, for trying to advance out of a fairly shabby area. The kids at his school? Shunned him for being a jumped up oik reaching above his station. He was never one of them in their eyes. Despite his intelligence he did not go on the tertiary education. He was so beaten down by the expectations foisted on him and the social exclusion it entailed he went straight off to get a job as soon as he could. These are the ways that the classist segregation in the UK in the 1970s and 80s worked. I imagine they still work like that now. Severus would very much be in the same state of “crab bucket” but even worse because he cannot talk about his school, or his achievements. Middle class Lily going to a school for the gifted? Wouldn’t raise an eyebrow with the neighborhood gossips. Snape the gutter snipe going to a boarding school? The curtains wouldn’t stop twitching over it. And most of the people on his street would actively want him to fail. That lie about St Brutus secure school for the incorrigible would have been far more feasible and acceptable to the residents of Spinner’s End. It would satisfy their resentment of him “rising above” his natural station and confirm their prejudice that he’d come to a bad end. There is still a huge prejudice around poverty, the very concept of worthy and unworthy poor still permeates the media, any articles about poverty and the benefits system will be riddled with these underlying assumptions that the really poor, the most desperate and least likely to ever get out of the grinding poverty, have brought it upon themselves. They are often painted as deserving their misery. Severus position straddling both worlds but belonging to neither, not being welcomed on either side of the divide is truly one of the most resonant aspects of his character to me.

You only have to look at George Osborne being given the nickname ‘oik’ in his days in the Bullingdon Club at Oxford University, for the crime of going to the third poshest school in the country (St Paul’s, rather than Eton or Harrow) and for his father being ‘in trade’.  His father, of course, founded Osborne & Little - and as the wikipedia article cites, Osborne holds a 15% stake in it, worth between £15m - £30m.

Indeed, you don’t have to go as far as public school for this to be true; Snape is of the grammar school era.  Snape is the kid who comes from the sink estate who passes his 11+ entrance exam against all odds.  When he reaches the school, where he’s fairly earned his place on intellectual merit (or in Hogwarts’ case, magical ability), he sticks out like a sore thumb.  He has the aptitude, but not the social background.

It’s why the depiction of James is equally important.  He’s similar to Snape in his magical ability - but he’s got the background that Snape hasn’t.  He’s wealthy, pampered, entitled.  James meets Snape and simply can’t comprehend why such a boy is also at the same school - remember, he meets Sirius at the same time, who also states that he’s from a Slytherin background and James’ reaction isn’t quite the same as it is with Snape.  “Blimey, and I thought you were all right.”  (or similar)  James had already made that value judgement; he’d already recognised that Sirius is from a similar sort of background.

When their journeys start, both boys are brimming with confidence (remember how Harry saw Snape by the river as cutting an impressive figure), but it doesn’t take long for James to be the boy who is regarded as popular, sporty, talented etc whilst Snape visibly wilts.  He’s twitchy, anxious, an oddball…as the text says, it’s as if he’s a plant kept in the dark.

Indeed, it’s no mistake that James - and in the modern era, Draco - is talented on a broom.  It’s no mistake that Harry, as a toddler, is given a broom.  It’s no mistake that the Weasley family are all talented with broom in hand, their prowess at Quidditch undeniable.  It’s no mistake then, that Snape picks up a broom and fails - some will claim it’s talent, but we see him mastering flight as an adult…it feels to me that this is a very clear indication that Snape wasn’t given the same opportunities.  He got to the school, but he didn’t have the extra-curricular assistance that others had the benefit of.  

There is a very important parallel that James and Sirius don’t accept Severus because Severus’ background makes him other - just as the Death Eaters and their ilk don’t accept Lily because Lily’s bloodline makes her other.

Snape succeeds against the odds - and what’s wholly tragic about the entire thing is that he succeeds against the odds because he’s a tool in the war.  He doesn’t become a professor, or a housemaster, or headmaster on merit.  He succeeds because he’s being used.  

Saw this article on Moss Side in Manchester on BBC News, which feels pertinent to this discussion:

There was a rise in poverty in the whole of the North West in the 1970s, as a lot of jobs moved to London and old industries began to disappear.
A programme of “slum clearance” took place, where lots of working class people’s houses in the area were demolished.
“This forces people who are very happy to be in a place like Moss Side into different suburbs, away from their networks, churches, extended families and friends.
“So you see a very sudden rupture of strong communities,” says Dr Wildman.

I think a lot about the Cokeworth that Eileen Prince moved to when she first encountered the Muggle world, and the one her son was left with when he had sole occupancy of the family home in the 90s.  

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babyfrog96

I sometimes feel like Eileen Prince married a fairly happy Tobias Snape who had a job and could put food on the table and found magic fascinating so she left her family to be with him and they were happy to have a child. But then the mines shut down and work dwindled. Tobias couldn’t get a job, couldn’t do his job as breadwinner, realised that Eileen’s magic couldn’t earn them money where they were so he got worse and worse, depressed and violent until we find the family that Severus unfortunately remembers - a father who can’t perform his family duties and so fights against leeches on his money and a mother who doesnt perform magic anymore as it betrayed her and couldn’t get her husband a job and so only uses it sparingly to protect her son from the worst of the harm.

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kyraneko

I suspect Tobias was (in addition to the commonplace disparities between courting behavior and "this is the way it's going to be" that certain types of men have used since time immemorial) much more comfortable with Eileen's magic when he had his own self-assurance and status by the standards of the community they lived in, than he was without it.

When he's got a job and is clearly the primary breadwinner and has the respect given to a successful family man, even if times are pretty tight, he's got a basis for self-respect and an advantageous position both within his marriage and outside it, and his wife having magic is a charming and useful quirk about her.

If he's lost his job or is on the dole or it's obvious either inside our outside the marriage that Eileen is doing a lot more than he is to put food on the table, now Eileen's magic is more of a threat to his status, and he'll bully her to keep her cowed from potentially using it against him and also take the loss of every way her magic could be good for them as a team in order to avoid her being that team's captain.

While the market for solar and wind energy sources is growing, transitioning to renewables at home isn’t easy. What happens when the sun goes in or when there’s no wind?
Solar panels and other kinds of green energy are usually backed up by other sources. These are needed to safeguard our power when the weather isn’t cutting it. We all want to be able to shower - even when it’s cloudy.
Usually, lithium-ion batteries provide this backup but these are pricey, meaning that most people can’t afford to switch entirely to renewables.
Scientists from MIT have created a new kind of battery that could provide a solution for storing energy at home. 
continue reading

Thanks for sending this in!

“Moving away from the traditional lithium-ion model, the new battery is made from aluminium and sulfur. Aluminium is the second most plentiful metal on the planet, after iron. It is also cheap. Sulfur is the least costly non-metal element. As a waste product from petrol refinement, it’s abundant. The entire battery can be made for about a sixth of the cost of its lithium equivalent. “

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inkskinned

it takes a really long time to unlearn but there's no such thing as "cheating" or "half-assing" being a person. if you need to leave the cabinet doors open, leave them open. microwave your tea. sit down in the shower. buy the eggmaker. use your phone to calculate tip.

it's mostly fake posterity rules. who cares if you microwave your dinners. who cares if you use instant coffee. who cares if you stop watching the show that got boring. we all have a different set of skills and a different life and taking care of yourself is fucking hard.

at the end of your life there will be no final scoreboard. nobody is going to judge you because you brushed your teeth in the shower. there will be no final count of the number of times you had the same meal five nights in a row. there will be no fanfare or party because you won at being a person - and no one will be disappointed that you never understood the point of using paper towels to dry your hands off after washing them.

yeah, in this world, people will put up a fuss. i've noticed some of the biggest fusses are over what you'll put in/on your body. the fact that i will regularly eat deli meat straight out of the bag makes a lot of people genuinely concerned for me. but here's the thing: sometimes that's the only way i'm getting any protein. my doctor says i am doing fine. i'm sticking to my weird snacks and calling it deconstructed charcuterie.

they'll say they're horrified because you take a shortcut. that's fine. it's just that it looks like a shortcut to them because they're on a different life path. these kinds of things stand out to them as important. that's fine too. but for you? you've got other things that already make you pretty hard working. and these tiny things - well, they're just clutter on your journey.

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kyraneko

If you sit down in the shower you're just as clean as if you stand, but you're cleaner than if you did not take the shower because you did not have the energy to stand in it and did not have the self-esteem to "cheat."

A general tip for students who are sending those dreaded Religious Absence Emails to your professors: Rather than asking permission to take the day(s) off, politely let them know that you will be taking the day(s) off.

In other words, consider not saying this:

"May I miss class on [date] so I can observe [holiday]?"

It's not that there's anything wrong with the above, per se. But because it's phrased as a request, it risks coming across as optional — a favor you hope to be granted. Problem is, favors are not owed, and so unfortunately asking permission opens the door for the professor to respond "Thanks for asking. No, you may not. :)"

Instead, try something along the lines of:

"I will need to miss class on [date] because I will be observing [holiday]. I wanted to let you know of this conflict now, and to ask your assistance in making arrangements for making up whatever material I may miss as a result of this absence."

This is pretty formal language (naturally, you can and should tweak it to sound more like your voice). But the important piece is that, while still being respectful, it shifts the focus of the discussion so that the question becomes not "Is it okay for me to observe my religion?", but rather, "How can we best accommodate my observance?

Because the first question should not be up for debate: freedom of religion is a right, not a favor. And the second question is the subject you need to discuss.

(Ideally, do this after you've looked up your school's policy on religious absences, so you know what you're working within and that religious discrimination is illegal. Just in case your professor forgot.)

This is also relevant to work. Obviously use at your own discretion but I have never in my life asked permission for time away, I simply inform the office I am unavailable for (dates) because of a personal/family matter or I have booked time away.

actually I don't particularly give a damn if people do good things for the "wrong" reasons

donating just to feel good about yourself? awesome every penny is still present and helpful

doing volunteer work just to post about it on social media? cool I wish more people would, those volunteer hours really add up

being nice to people to "trick" them into thinking you're a good person? buddy you just accidentally marie kondoed your own personality.

feeding the hungry, housing the unhoused, healing the injured? do you think the hungry, the poor, the sick and the exhausted give a damn about your moral dilemmas? do you think for one second that something as flimsy as your intentions makes warm food, a safe bed, and the abscence of pain any less real to those who receive them?

doing nice things for "selfish" reasons is fine actually. especially if it encourages more people to do those things. if you are making the world a slightly better place to live in, I really don't care what your motivation is; the rest of us still have to live here.

Jewish proverb:

A rich man proudly announces his intention to build an orphanage. Later, however, he goes to his rabbi and says “Rabbi, I’ve decided not to do it. I realized I was only building the orphanage because I wanted to be seen as a philanthropist.”

The rabbi says, “What?! Build the orphanage! Do you think the orphans will care why you did it?”

thing is - and hear me out - if s3 does by any minute chance incorporate any suggestion of a sex scene, it is imperative for me that they commit to the bit. i need crowley to nearly topple over trying to get out of his jeans, i need aziraphale to complain that they cant do anything downstairs because that would be scandalous, and i need them to trip over going up the stairs because they keep getting distracted. i need one of them to accidentally get an elbow to the face, i need them to have a long forgotten book digging into one of their backs, and aziraphale is horrified when crowley launches it across the room, and i need there to be hard cut to whickber street having a huge power surge, lines sparking, all the power going out, and every car alarm in a 2-mile radius start screaming, i don't need it to be explicit or overly romantic but i do need it to be fucking funny

#DoItForMichaelSheen

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leviosally

The taaaaggsss 😂🤣

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tyrograph

@leviosally with the best additions 🤣

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vaspider

pleaaaaaase y'all the process of having a manufacturing facility declared kosher has nothing to do with a rabbi blessing the food

pleaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaase stop

This touches on something I feel like most Christians (cultural and/or practicing) reaaaaallllly don’t get which is that rabbis traditionally aren’t clergy/priests in the Christian sense.

A rabbi isn’t a divinely-ordained speaker-for-God whose primary role is leading worship. Traditionally, rabbis are experts in Jewish law, practice, culture, history, etc.

A rabbi doesn’t have any sacred/spiritual/magical powers to bless things that any other Jew doesn’t have. (And that’s not how blessing things works in Judaism anyway. It’s an expression of gratitude, not a transmutation or instillation of magic divine power.)

The reason a rabbi is involved is to *make sure everything’s being done correctly.* Because they’re an *expert*.

Not to “bless” anything to fill it with godpowers or whatever.

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vaspider

Yes yes this.

You call in a rabbi to supervise and make sure that a kosher food production facility is set up properly the same way that you call in a master electrician to check and make sure all the lines are set up correctly. The electrician isn't blessing your production line any more than the rabbi is - they're both there to make sure shit is being done right.

So what you’re saying. Is the rabbi is like kOSHA?

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vaspider

This made me laugh so hard I wheezed.

sorry if this was answered previously i glanced thru blog search but do you know what species of salsify you had/have? On wikipedia it says Tragopogon porrifolius has been usually replaced in Europe by Scorzonera hispanica. I wanna grow the oyster taste plant (i am experimenting with hydroponics).

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Salsify ‘Sandwich Island Mammoth'. This is Tragopogon, with a white root and orange-oxidising sap, and is the one called “vegetable oyster.” Really lovely, ornamental, orb-shaped purple flowers in the second year, that produce vast quantities of seeds.

Sandwich Island Mammoth is the most common varietal and grows the thickest roots. In the UK, it’s the archetypal salsify; scorzonera (black salsify) is just called scorzonera.

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Ah, they're probably coming up next! I don't recognise the performance off the top of my head, but doing ballet is HELLISHLY INTENSE and doing it without your muscles througly warmed up is just asking for injured tendrons. In between scenes the dancers literally can't sit still for too long or their muscles will cool down, or worse, cramp up, and if they're not changing costumes they're usually stretching, vigorously massaging their legs and, like here, bouncing around to the tune.

So this is a perfectly natural ballerina behavior. They're just keeping warm and bonding. 👍

I love how the last line has the exact cadence of a "is the ballerina video cute" blog

these ballerinas are not distressed and this in fact good enrichment for ballerinas when confined outside their natural habitat (the stage)

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kyraneko

I'm viewing it as the ballerina equivalent of cats doing the butt wiggle right before they pounce.

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inkskinned

at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"

like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.

"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."

... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.

and i'd still keep writing.

i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistant. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.

i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley

"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"

and i see a kid drowing. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.

it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.

you create because you're greedy.

I have seen three different "how much of this site is queer" polls this evening poking fun at staff's 1/4 assertion and not a single indication any of them understand statistics. One someone even replied "This might have some sampling bias" what do you mean might what do you mean SOME

Yeah I'll just reblog this 'are you queer' poll in my little corner of Tumblr, where I talk regularly about being queer and most of my followers are queer. No the tradwives and bigots and nazi tumblrinas and people who send others death threats for using the word 'queer' who I blocked ages ago won't see it. What do you mean sampling bias.

Bad example of a Xanatos Gambit: "You fool! I have seventy alternative evil plans!"

Good example of a Xanatos Gambit: "I have one evil plan. There are five ways it could feasibly turn out. Four of them benefit me in some way and the fifth absolutely devestates the heroes."

It's like the trolley problem from the train's perspective. Whether you pull the lever or not, it still gets to feed

GVGHVGAVGSVGDVGAVGVGVGSV

I am dying from that last line :D

This is a great post: both excellent narrative device AND a hysterical way of making me even more uncomfortable about the trolley problem

THE TRAIN HUNGERS

That’s just the Red Line in DC.

I dont think I've ever seen a Red Line train that was not conpletely full

I am not at liberty to confirm whether or not either the DC or LA red line eat people

Pedestrian Plazas imply the existence of Train plazas where trains can gather for social engagement without the threat of cars

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dovahguiin

Excuse me, Mr. Amtrak, sir, I believe that’s called a roundhouse.

You spin me right round baby, right round like a record baby

how what???

I’m not good with the science of this or anything (someone who knows more feel free to add) but fish can play??? Fish can play like any other animal?? People saying it couldn’t breathe, do human kids not hold their breaths to go under water for fun? It’s just the opposite. Air is water, water is air. In the same vein as a kid being thrown up and into the pool and enjoying it, the fish is playing.

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shiekah

okay… as someone who studies marine biology I need to clarify something:

fish are unable to hold their breaths. They literally cannot take a deep breath like mammals do.

We have lungs that can take in a specific volume of air, fish have gills that work when they are ventilated enough. There are different kinds of gills, yes. Some fish have something called ‘operculum’ which is like a cap on top of the gills, helping to protect them and increasing the water circulation through the gills. Some fish DONT have this structure and need to swim in order to be able to breathe.

But the fact that they cannot hold their breaths doesnt mean that they cannot survive without water for a while - in fact, fish can (usually) survive being without water WAY LONGER than we could survive being without air.

I cannot tell if this fish does this for fun, but it sure looks like it. But I am not a behavioural biologist, so I can’t tell for sure.

It is abundantly clear the fish is a willing participant. It’s sort of arrogant to assume animals other than humans don’t play like humans.

Im not a behavior biologist either, but I have spent a lot of time around fish and ive spent a lot of time talking to and helping people that care for fish. (Former petstore fish guy that took his job too seriously)

That fish is having fun, and fish absolutely DO have fun!

There was a regular who came into the store I worked at a lot, and he kept several varieties of chichlids, a very smart, aggressive type of fish.

He would come in and talk to me about all the drama his fish get into. The different territorial disputes they were having, who had paired off with who, who broke up (yes chichlids are like this)

But he had a jack dempsey in particular that LOVED to chase his hand around the tank, not his wife’s hand, not his friend’s hand, it HAD to be him. He said that as soon as he entered the room where this fish’s tank was kept, the fish would TEAR UP the tank decor, knocking things over and acting a fool off his shits until this dude stuck his hand in there and let the fish chase it around back and forth.

He theorized that his fish learned that if he knocked the tank decor around, his owner would obviously have to stick his hand in to fix it. So when he wants to play “chase dad’s hand” thats naturally how he knows he can get the hand to appear. He wont do this behavior for anybody but this one guy and he won’t tear up the tank anymore after he had received sufficient “play time”, usually once a day when the guy got home from work. He likened it to having a dog that wont leave you alone till you play tug o war for a bit.

I had a betta that would spend twenty minutes at a time just swimming up to the waterfall of the filter, letting it push him down to the bottom of the tank, only to swim back up and do it again, like it was a fucking slide.

Bettas are weak swimmers, and they dislike strong currents, but this guy was using the filter current like a slide. Kinda like how we don’t really like getting thrown around, but we still enjoy rollercoasters.

I also have countless stories about goldfish trying to “give hugs” (re: shove themselves into their owners hands during tank maintenance)

My betta knows how to lie and he will only beg for food in front of those he knows have not fed him yet.

There is so much evidence I’ve seen that fish are waaaay smarter and affectionate than we think. They absolutely have fun and I honestly don’t think enough studies have been done on fish brains and fish behavior in general.

And honestly, having worked in a pet store, fish are generally treated like they don’t have brains by even the fish care brands that claim expert knowledge.

Its definitely worth noting that hard scientific evidence presenting that the very opposite is true would probably lead to more robust animal welfare laws that would definitely upset the aquatics industry. Food for thought.

I think you’re absolutely right on that last point. The misconception that fish are too thoughtless to have feelings facilitates the abhorrent conditions in which they are kept and ways they are treated by the industry.

I used to have a lovely tank, I think it was 50 gallons, and among other things I kept glass catfish. All the research at the time said they were hard to keep in captivity and prone to refusing to eat and starving themselves, and that they did not live long in captivity. But I was fascinated and had to try it. It took me about three days to realize none of the literature said a word about them being nocturnal. I started feeding them at night right before bed, and had zero problems getting them to eat, saw they were incredibly active as soon as the lights went off (I have exceptional night vision) and I kept them in excellent health for years. Exponentially beyond their captive life expectancy.

I think the commercial pet fish trade is abysmal in terms of actual working knowledge of fish.

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todaysbird

(i beckon you into a shady alleyway and open my trench coat to reveal a plethora of native flowers buzzing with hummingbirds)