im screaming

omfggggg

Reblog if you're shorter than 5'8.

little kids are so creepy

example: i have a student who kisses me on the arm every day and whispers, “there, now you’ll live until tomorrow” and one day he didn’t kiss me and when he came to school the next morning he looked genuinely surprised to see me alive

Virgin shaming and slut shaming piss me off in equal amounts. There’s nothing magical or special about being a virgin, and same goes with having sex. You know what’s magical? Shutting the fuck up about people’s personal choices. 

A man just assaulted me with milk, cream and butter. How dairy..

why cant there be 2 week days and 5 days in the weekend

Ingrid Nilsen (via itsmamrieharto)

if i become a drug dealer i’m gonna say to my customers ‘now put THAT in your pipe and smoke it” and we’d all laugh and then i’d call the police because drugs are fucking illegal

do u ever suddenly realise how unpopular and disliked and lonely you are and then you’re kind of just like ohhhhhhhhhh o k

SHUT SEAWORLD THE FUCK DOWN