Astronaut sculpture from an ex-physicist (Source/Credit)

they're an ex-physicist because they decided not to follow the laws of physics for this one and the physics society kicked them out

Audio from @themornal

his favourite little cake 🍰

(she guessed right)

downside: going to have to include a picture of the Giza pyramids in the slides for the lecture upside: i get to give people a crash course in why perspective matters in two frames, because

followed by

is such a funny sequence

i find most people who haven't seen it in person don't know that cairo is RIGHT THERE

I loved these perspectives so I took some of my own when I was in Cairo and yeah, they're literally just. Right there. Pass em on your way to work, nbd

No, y'all don't even understand.

There is literally a Pizza Hut across the street from the pyramids.

That Pizza Hut among other things is why Egyptologists laugh their asses off when we see another piece of media where the protagonists get "lost in the desert near the pyramids", because it's like... just turn around my dudes you're only a seven min walk away from the nearest fastfood shop

Yall don't know how much I adore all of this

#it’s a learning curve

I haven't used Tumblr for years, maybe it's time to come here.

I'm considering posting all my GO fanart but it'll take time.🤔

Anyway, this is my first post, a disaster-puppy.

congratulations piracy

Ad agency: Please don't steal the King's potatoes, no matter how easy it is.

Regular people: Wait, the King has easily stolen potatoes? How do I get in on this?

Internet users who have been stealing potatoes for years: We made a machine that picks so many potatoes and also that machine is free. Enjoy!

Ad agency: you wouldn't steal a movie?

10 year old me with 0 income and no movie: YOU CAN STEAL MOVIES????

Roommate went out of town once, asked me to look after her cat.

Night one she comes down meowing at me. I go check her food/water, they're full. Litter box empty. Make sure my roommate's door is still open and she's not locked out of her room or something. I try to pet her and she dodges me, offer her treats and she won't have it, try playing with her but she won't play, try just ignoring her and she won't stop following me around meowing at me.

So I call my roommate, concerned maybe she was sick or in pain and that's why she was being so insistent despite having all her needs met.

Roommate goes: "OH! She wants you to go to bed. Go upstairs to my room and just sit in my bed with her for a few minutes. She should curl up and get comfortable. Once shes laid down she usually lets me go back to what I'm doing she just can't seem to go to bed on her own"

Sure enough, I go sit on roommates bed and she just happily jumps up, curls up on the blanket, and purrs herself to sleep.

I like when cats try to give their humans healthy habits.

From Theophile Gautier, mid-19th century, about his very floofy white cat:

Cats : trying to make us go to bed at a Reasonable Time since forever (so they can wake us up at 3 am for treats)

did i even tell you guys how i pretended to know how to play an instrument for three years and only two people ever figured it out.

i don't mean i was like. telling people i could play guitar, i mean i was sitting in band class holding a french horn to my lips and looking at the music and not understanding any of it or knowing how to play a single note. for 3 years.

the two people who knew were my best friend who knew i was too stupid to play such a complicated instrument and the only other hornist in my section who had to desperately cover for me because he knew i had blackmail material on him. i only came clean this year in my senior speech and to this day people still call me mellophony and the no hit wonder.

I am personally a mix of a lot of these and I am trying to decide how to feel

Today I introduced my sister to “the problem of Susan” and I had to explain to her that Susan was left out of Narnia cuz she liked boys and lipstick now and without missing a beat she said but what about Peter? Does Peter not like girls? And I knew she was pointing out the inherent misogyny at the center of the “the problem of Susan” but the implications of that question are a source of much hilarity to meeee LMFAO like Does Peter not like girls? Does he like boys? Is he Gay? Is Narnia really just a homo-utopia where Lucy is also a lesbian and Edmund is a bisexual disaster and Susan was kicked out cuz she was too straight??? Can I make CS Lewis turn over in his grave with this new reading?

…I mean they literally were in the closet…

THEY WERE LITERALLY IN THE CLOSET!!!

Reblog to make C.S. Lewis turn over in his grave

TBH, once the nuances were explained to him, I think he’d find it quite funny. 

@shannaraisles

YES.

jaskier: *breathes* yarpen: I KNOW! I KNOW I FCKING KNOW

part 20 - THE END 🥺✨❤ i love you so much, thank you for playing with me!!! I hope to see you again in my new fic, I'm putting a lot of work into it

.

Time traveling has a lot in common with unwillingly losing your consciousness. It doesn't take long for Jaskier to understand that, not when the parallels are so clear to see. For example, waking up afterwards is always incredibly disorienting. Your body is still heavy from getting thrown around, your mind struggling to catch up with what has happened to you. Sometimes it takes a few moments to collect yourself, other times you'll feel like you're half-asleep for the rest of the day.

So it's no wonder that Jaskier wakes to the horribly familiar ceiling of a tavern in upper Posada and immediately takes in a deep breath, expecting a piece of stale bread to connect with his temple.

What he doesn't expect is hearing the delighted squeal of his daughter, who suddenly throws her entire bodyweight into his arms. She hasn't done that since she was a child, but gods above he missed it and his heavy arms immediately wrap around her. Not a moment too late her excited voice rings out, “You did it! Jaskier you did it!”

Adrenaline washes through his system with so much force his heart jumps almost painfully. Sitting up he is quick to realizes that he's been resting on his bedroll in the middle of the otherwise vacant tavern room. Vacant but for two other people besides him. Ciri, grinning widely in his arms, and Geralt, sitting next to him on his own bedroll with a warm smile on his face. “Hey,” he greets Jaskier softly.

“Geralt?” his voice is small, hopeful.

“Yeah.”

“My Geralt?”

“Yes, Julek, yours.”

Jaskier clings to Ciri as he cries his heart out. For the first time in a really long time, it's happy tears. He's done it. Somehow he's done it and he silently thanks every god out there that helped him along the way. It was worth it. All the heartache, all the pain was worth it in the end. He has his Geralt back, his beloved darling husband, the man that he loves more than anything in this world.

Carefully extracting himself from Ciri's tight embrace, he wipes his tears away with the sleeve of his doublet and holds his hands out to Geralt. "Hey," he sniffles, only now noticing the redness around the witcher's eyes. "Hey, yourself," Geralt answers.

"I did it?"

"You did it. We're home."

The Road to Kaer Morhen - p.1

Whereas the country of Kaedwen was a bit infamous for its unforgiving winters, people rarely talked about the summers in the north. If anyone had cared enough to ask, Jaskier would've happily stated that the summertime up in the mountains was just as character-strong as it's opposing season. A weird statement for the bard, since Jaskier tended to call summer his favorite season, but unlike the norm it wasn't the steadily rising temperatures that were bothering him. It was the light.

After many years of travel his body had become accustomed to wake with the spreading brightness of a new day and rest when the sun hid behind the horizon. It was an incredibly useful habit that allowed him to get the most out of each beautiful summer day and catch up on rest as well as rightfully sleep through every single one of Marx' morning lectures during winter at Oxenfurt. Problematic about this was, that the kaedweni summer sun had yet to understand that Jaskier needed at least seven hours of his beauty sleep. To think clearly and to keep his impulses in check, because who was he trying to fool – he always looked pretty no matter the circumstances.

The part with the impulse control was the hardest one, he mused as he took a bite of the glazed sweet roll he had not intended to be his breakfast but enjoyed none the less. Due to the lack of shutters on the windows of his temporary bedroom, he had been awake dreadfully early and left the inn at the same time the owner of the bakery across the street had opened his doors and windows. The baker turned out to be a very charming man that had not only taken pity on Jaskier's oh so grim situation and spent the morning listening to the bard's idle chatter, but had also gifted him not one but two of the heavenly sweet rolls because 'they came out too crooked to sell'. Jaskier had thanked the baker by kissing him on the cheek and left once the first tired customer knocked against the door.

Licking the white sugar glaze from his fingertips, Jaskier strolled towards the town's daily marked were the vendors set up all kinds of stalls. From farmers and butchers to tailors and leather workers, Jaskier was sure he could make out almost every major profession which was absolutely perfect given this was the last big town he'd travel through before finding his way to Kaer Morhen. Or at least trying to do so.

It wasn't like Geralt had ever taken him to his wondrous witcher winter home before, or given him a map for that matter. Geralt had only asked him once, which felt like a lifetime ago, if he'd like to spend a winter at Kaer Morhen. Back then Jaskier, much younger and always so caught up in his own affairs, had listened to Geralt's bland description of a more crusty than rustic, crumbling and freezing fortress and had gently told the other man that he very much appreciated the thought but was fond of all of his toes and rather spent his winters in Oxenfurt. After a long moment of contemplated thinking Geralt had then told him that Jaskier, should he ever find himself in honest trouble, would find his safety at Kaer Morhen. That is, should he ever manage to find the keep, which certainly wasn't guaranteed given the fact that Geralt had never given him any true directions. What he had memorized instead was a list of obscure waypoints, like 'the big mossy rock', the 'jumping tree branch' or 'the cliff that looked like a raccoon'.

The bard could only hope that if he made it to the gates, the grandmaster of the keep would count being wanted by the entirety of the nilfgaardian army, the Redanian Secret Service essentially telling him he was on his own, his flat at Oxenfurt being broken into and an assassination attempt almost succeeding whilst he was playing at the Baron of Yspaden's name day, as 'troublesome enough' to let him stay. Especially since the latest incident had him storming out of Yspaden in such a hurry that he hadn't had time to change out his packs. As a result he was walking around the kaedweni landscape in his best court apparel which – if his unexpected travel companion, who was still peacefully asleep at the inn, was to believed – made him look like a peacock in a chicken coop. Trying to blend in with the rest was comically impossible, so Jaskier had straight out given up on that and instead done what he did best. He let his hair grow out, called himself Dandelion the Poet, performed his new songs even louder and strutted around the world like he owned it. Until now it had worked perfectly well. He just needed to spent the rest of his coin at the market for some might-come-in-handy supplies, collect his friend and would be on his way towards the rocky wilderness where nobody would dare to follow him.

Should be simple enough, shouldn't it?

The current problem being that Jaskier had no idea what those supplies should be and his coin was already limited from buying all the usual essentials for traveling. Looking around his eyes caught various things that seemed like good possibilities. Like a long roll of rope for example, Geralt always insisted on carrying rope with them in case one needed to secure something, say, a still bleeding monster head to a poor horse or a bard to a tree to keep him from following the witcher on a hunt. A second coat was always an advantage, especially since his companion at the inn didn't have one, but then again it was summer and the days and night were warm enough. Additional food wouldn't be a bad choice either, dried meat and fruits wrapped in beeswax sheets could last a while and if carefully portioned keep them from going hungry on days, but Jaskier was quite proud of his foraging skills and cooking usually wasn't a problem for him. He sighed and looked around further. A sister of the nearby temple was selling blessed charms to be placed on the little shrines of Melitele that could be found at almost every crossroad. The little parchment packages with herbs would be a good idea but Jaskier also incredibly fancied the the beautifully crafted hat with it's wide brim and ornate feather.

please like and reblog if you voted

✨🌿🌼✨

Jaskier singing "I am... enough." after he spent all of season one being treated like he wasn't and literally being blamed for everything going wrong is making me fucking break down yes jaskier yes you are fucking enough you've always been enough

Kind of Witcher S3 spoilers !!!! But just a funny!!!

My beloved (who is a musician ironically enough) who I often base my incorrect Witcher texts off of because we act like Geralt and Jaskier | Dandelion watching S3 and his reaction to Valdo is priceless

@limabean-7152

Jaskier and Ciri together is EVERYTHING

Omg

I love it so much

And then Jaskier practically singing get to sleep

Fuck I love this show

i can’t believe theyre trying to convince me that jaskier isnt in love with geralt after that scene where he voices over yennefer, like that WAS JUST HIM not to mention his gay ass song (lovingly)

like this is not abt a man he just met bffr

Jaskier and the cat. That's it, that's the post.