i’ve heard a lot of people say “don’t reach out to your friends first and see how many people will remain in your life. those are your true friends” and i get it. it sucks and it’s tiring constantly being the one to message first, to initiate hang outs but don’t take this so literally. some friendships require initiation. i have lost touch with so many people who genuinely cared about me and wanted me in their life because i stopped reaching out. it’s a hard pill to swallow but honestly some people just suck at it and it doesn’t mean they don’t love and value you. i’ve reconnected with some people over the past few months and it’s crazy how genuinely happy they are to see me and how engaged they are in the conversation. i just think sometimes we’re too harsh on each other & too quick to emphasize other peoples flaws and remove them from our lives but then we’ll all be alone and what’s the point of life then!!!!
every day i get top surgery and every night they grow back again
😭😭😭
Sorry to everyone who’s enjoyed the last 130 years of science and culture journalism, but Disney needs the money to fund Toy Story 9
okay guys hashtag not sponsored but tonight we went to a market and there was a man. this man's name was SEAN and he sold CERAMICS that happened to be in the trans pride colours and it was definitely an accident but he said "oh cool :)" when i mentioned it and wasn't weird so ally points for that one.
he also told another customer while we were there that he knew his wife was gonna be mad with him because she packed a bunch of paper bags for him to give to customers and he left them in the car which, relatable to us all.
anyway @teacupsandcyanide and i were channeling nadja and lazlo tonight (picture: a short dude in a frilly white shirt and deep blue frock coat, walking arm in arm through the night market with a being of many genders in all black with a witch's hat and a black lace veil over their face.) he told us we were the best dressed people in the market and that he gonna give us a deal because of it. he also told us he was excited because this was his first (!!) market selling his wares.
he was selling teacups for $aud35 a pop and when i went to buy two he gave them to us for $aud50 for the PAIR?? and i was like aw omg thank you :) and i said i wished i could buy more but i just couldn't afford it (not joking: would buy all of my crockery from him if i could.) and then he got a shifty look in his eyes and picked up a tiny milk jug i'd been looking at earlier and told me to TAKE IT??? FOR FREE??? and i was like NO OMG YOU NEED TO MAKE MONEY??? and he insisted and i took it because IT'S SO CUTE. but i'm genuinely concerned that this man may actually be losing money because he's too nice to people, hence this post:
look at his ceramics. feast your eyes.
You forgot that as we were leaving he was like “neither of you happen to be called Georgia, right?” And when we were like “no ??? But tell me more I must know” he showed us one little mug he’d set aside. He’d stamped the name Georgia on the underside and he was like “I’m gonna give it to the first person I meet called Georgia” with such whimsy in his eyes. 10/10 stall holder, top lad Sean
My brother's girlfriend had HPV, so he went to get himself the HPV vaccine. There is a fee to pay (nothing much, something like €87) but it's completely free if you're in one of the "at risk" groups.
"What does that mean," he asks. "It's free if you're gay," he's told. "Ah. Would I have to like, prove it, or...?" "Just put in a check mark here."
My brother is in no way, shape or form attracted to men, but also he's stingy as it gets. So now he's officially gay. Congrats bro.
"Doctor, give it to me straight" "You sure, there's a fee" "… Give it to me gay"
AGAB (Assigned Gay At Billing)
I know it’s not actually a measure of their medical competence but I can’t trust doctors if I can’t make them laugh. If I can make them laugh then maybe they will care about me just that much more. You wouldn’t let your favorite clown go neglected, would you? You wouldn’t let Pagliacci DIE?
PT: “What are your goals for physical therapy?”
Me: “I want to be the Dancing Queen.”
PT: “Oh, are you a dancer?”
Me: “No, but maybe physical therapy could help me unleash my potential.”
PT: “I’m going to put down ‘exercise’.”
My optometrist was a tough nut to crack but eventually I got him to open up about his Tragic Backstory then he laughed sadistically at me for crying about it—but he DID laugh. So. Counts as a win.
why does your optometrist have a tragic backstory
the worldbuilding is exquisite
conducting a new experiment called maintaining a normal conversation. i'll let you know how it goes
brought up the eel sex discovery again :/
speaking of: did you guys know that the mystery of eel breeding has finally been discovered??
the reproduction of eels has been a mystery since ancient fucking greece and they JUST discovered how they do it. scientists followed european eels that migrated thousands of kilometers from freshwater streams and rivers to the Sargasso sea (which is by north america) where the females released millions of eggs into the water and the males fertalized them and then the eels just died. because appearantly thats the end of their lifespan.
its insane. its bonkers. ALL european and american eels reproduce IN THE SAME PLACE. european eels swim across the north atlantic ocean just to reproduce. these eels live for about 20 years and go through multiple complex life stages but they begin and end their lives in the same place, despite how far they travel. and god dont get me started on other species of eels-
dom/me solidarity in these trying times.
Sexual themes
So... I wrote a bunch of sapphic erotica stories and asked some of my very talented pals to draw them. We're putting together a super sexy comic collection! Kickstarter launches on July 18th. 😜 (we'll also have some incredible guest artist variants as well)
important PSA about when your car is smoking
like literally smoking from the engine
white and you smell pancakes? it’s the coolant. panic and pull over, but you’ll live
a slight blue tinge? it’s the oil. panic and pull over, but you’ll live
grey, looks like fire smoke? gasoline; the most combustable and dangerous. pull over and leave the vehicle, pray.
sharing because i didn’t know this when my car started smoking white yesterday and i was so afraid for my life.
Reblogging because a dear friend of my Moms with mechanic experience told me the same thing when I got my license.
White or blue, you’ll pull through. But if it’s gray, get away.
This looks like a fucking parody post, or an edgy edit, but it’s 100% official real Flintstones.
Clarification: I don’t hate this book, I love it, it’s amazing. It’s just that taking a step back and looking it out of context is still really funny. Especially the line “We participated in a genocide, Barney.”
ok but imagine them in their cartoon forms saying this dialogue i’m
can we have some context to this, perhaps?
Bedrock is having a mayoral election. One of the candidates is a violent war mongering asshole that riles people up against the lizard people. This reminds Fred and Barney of their time in the army.
Back then the father of said violent candidate was riling people up against the “tree people”. Fred, Barney, and other soldiers fought what they believed to be a defensive measure against the tree people. Turns out, it was actually an invasion, in order to kill off the tree people and take over their forest to build Bedrock.
That’s what Fred means when he says he and Barney participated in a genocide. They literally did.
(Extra fun fact, Barney adopted a tree person baby after the war, and his son Bamm-Bamm is the last tree person.)
just fucking read it
There are a lot of interesting things about this post but the AK-47 shaped spear is what really got me
This is just as wild with the context
Some of my favorite moments in the series
From the foreword to 2021 print of the comic.
"- My tongue the dagger at your jugular. My love the sword at your bosom. Which do you want?"
here’s my one whole discourse post for pride month. you fucks will never ever ever wean off the radfem shit if you keep trying to give “cis men are evil” nuance. no, it’s not bad because they could be closeted or questioning, it’s bad because gender essentialism is a fucking brain poison and it makes you stupid
this is “not all men” cloaked in progressive-sounding vocabulary
harry potter blog.
I really think that we need to be at peace with the idea of people posting online for attention. Literally every free piece of media from shitposts to art is being made for the very human need for attention and that's healthy and okay. It's not harmful behaviour to make funnyman shitposts for attention. I love my useless internet clout points actually
'You're just posting that for likes and reblogs"
That's the whole point dipshit
Do you guys think I make wizard themed shitposts to realign my chakras or something
hey netizens! i'm not sure how many people are aware, but youtube's been slowly rolling out a new anti-adblock policy that can't be bypassed with the usual software like uBlock Origin and Pi-Hole out of the gate
BUT, if you're a uBlock Origin user (or use an adblocker with a similar cosmetics modifier), you can add these commands in the uBlock dashboard to get rid of it!
youtube.com##+js(set, yt.config_.openPopupConfig.supportedPopups.adBlockMessageViewModel, false) youtube.com##+js(set, Object.prototype.adBlocksFound, 0) youtube.com##+js(set, ytplayer.config.args.raw_player_response.adPlacements, []) youtube.com##+js(set, Object.prototype.hasAllowedInstreamAd, true)
reblog to help keep the internet less annoying and to tell corporations that try shit like this to go fuck themselves <3
Where do I copy-paste these to? "My filters"? "My Rules"?
'my filters'! if you look closely you'll notice the format is different between the two pages. the (website)(##)(additional text) format goes in filters
Tag your age if you wanna bc I was just thinking about how I have used floppy disks before (I'm 25 and used them in elementary computer lab) but my 22 y.o. brother hasn't which is so weird to me like 3 years isn't a long time at all to me
being a pepper plant has to be so weird.
Imagine evolving capsaicin specifically to stop mammals from eating your fruits, and then a mammal comes along that not only will eat your fruits, but likes them specifically because of the capsaicin, so much that it starts using its weird paws to distribute and care for your seeds, which turns into a strong selective force that literally starts evolving you into producing MORE capsaicin and makes you a WAY more successful and wider ranged species than you ever were before
simply because this mammal LOVES Pain Chemical. that evolved specifically to produce pain in mammals. It's not that the capsaicin isn't WORKING. It's just that these freaks like it.
This is the same mammal with social instincts so goddamn strong that they literally try to form social bonds with their predators, and end up evolving the predators into a new species that fits into their social communities as a form of mutualistic symbiosis, and exists in several different forms with unique morphology and behaviors based on the function they perform.
Instead of, I don't know, EVOLVING TO BE FASTER, this animal finds a faster animal and sits on it. Which shouldn't even work because the faster animal is a prey animal and this animal is a predator, but SOMEHOW they FORM A SOCIAL BOND WITH THE PREY. So they can sit on it while it runs fast. And somehow the prey animal?? is cool with this?? and benefits from this relationship???
Literally how can you hate humans. Humans are possibly the most hilarious thing evolution has ever done.
other things humans have done
- eat poison plants, decide they like getting poisoned, and evolve the plants to poison them more
- evolve to not have hair, but they find mammals with thick fluffy hair and put the hair on themselves, and evolve the mammals to produce extra hair so they can both have a warm coat of hair
- split up their parasitic lice species into two separate species because they start taking other animals' hair and putting it on themselves so much
- learn how to set things on fire on purpose. maintain body temperature by just standing beside some wood that's on fire instead of literally any normal option
- figure out that their prey tastes better and is easier to digest when they hold it over a fire after killing it. get smarter because they digest food so good after it's been held over a fire.
- find a poisonous plant and try washing it in boiling water until they don't die when they eat it anymore
- go across the ocean by making a floating nest despite not being able to breathe underwater, drink ocean water, or even swim naturally
- drink milk from other mammals even though they can't digest it and it makes them sick. Evolve those mammals to produce more milk than their babies can drink so they can drink the milk. Some members of the species evolve to be able to digest milk because they were so hellbent on drinking it.
- find flowers, bugs and minerals that are nice colors and crush them up to try to turn other things that color
- eat mushrooms that make their nervous systems malfunction because they like malfunctioning their nervous systems
humans worldwide looking up into the celestial vault of stars a million light years away, separated from Earth by the deadly cold and emptiness of space: I bet there are guys up there to form social bonds with