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killingyouwithprongs

@killingyouwithprongs

link to the marauders fan base discord - https://discord.gg/AP8Jf4bh - reggies.swimming.teacher on tt

Regulus: you better sort yourself out before I call in my boyfriend

Random Slytherin: ha, your little wife can't scare me

James, stumbling in like a ball of energy: HIIIIIIIIIIII I'M JAMES!!!! :D

Slytherin: *cowering and hiding*

regulus: mother and father completely ruined my life, i can’t stand them

sirius: and yet you’re wearing the gucci pajamas mother bought you and you’re currently online shopping using fathers credit card

regulus: they gave me a horrible childhood, they can make up for it by buying me things *turns to james* would you like a giraffe? there’s currently one for sale on craigslist for $70,000 and i think that’s just enough to make mother go crazy

james: omg yes yes yes

sirius:

sirius: wait buy me one too

remus: absolutely not, you are not bringing a giraffe to the dorm

regulus: come on remus, let them have their giraffes. i’ll buy you a cat

remus: this is not the regulus i’m used to, usually you always agree with me

regulus: today i’m trying to erase my childhood trauma by buying things

remus:

remus: yeah get me the cat

i have made this 😭😭😭

Bc the marauders fandom are having another 'wow 😟 can't believe we drove another creator away 😪 how did we possibly do that? 😔' moment

I thought I'd mention a little thing many of you seem to do without thinking about

This is just about fics bc I'm not an artist so I wouldn't know about how they're treated but:

This sort of shit

Idk if you realise but authors can see your bookmarks. So you may be leaving a 2/5 star rating to help you filter out rereads or give recs to others but the author can fucking SEE IT and all that's gonna do is make them wanna

1) orphan it

2) delete it

3) abandon it

4) never write again

5) leave the fandom

Which really shouldn't be a shock to you

This is one of those little things that builds up and leads someone to leave a fandom and it's really easy to like...not do it so then people feel comfortable and don't have to leave

Which is really funny bc that's what people have been saying for months but y'know...ignore it and keep acting surprised that people are leaving if it makes you feel better

[Harry's birthday]

Remus: will the guests be presenting gifts now?

Regulus: yeah

Remus: sorry in advance, couldn't stop him

Regulus: wha-

Sirius: Harry, in a couple of months this dragon will grow up, it will be several hundred times bigger than you

Harry: wow!! Thank you, uncle Sirius! *hugs Sirius*

James: that's a really cool present, Padfoot *hugs Sirius*

Regulus: *horrified* are you all fucking nuts?!

*wolfstar raising harry*

harry: guys i have something to tell you. you might not like it, but it’s who i am, and i can’t hide that from you guys any longer

sirius: harry you can tell us anything!

remus: yes we love you!

harry: okay well… i’m bisexual… idk if you guys are okay with that or if you even know what it means but i had to tell you

remus:

sirius:

remus: harry what do you… what do you mean that we don’t know what being bisexual is??

harry: well yk because both of you are straight-

sirius: I’M SORRY WHAT

remus: harry you think we’re straight??

harry: yeah because you guys are!

sirius: REMUS AND I ARE MARRIED

harry: WHAT I THOUGHT YOU TWO WERE ROOMMATES OR SOMETHING??

sirius: WE LITERALLY RAISED YOU 😭 YOU CALL US “MOONS” AND “PAD” DO YK WHAT THAT STANDS FOR HARRY?? IT STANDS FOR “MOM” AND “DAD”

harry: I THOUGHT YOU GUYS WERE JUST RAISING ME PLATONICALLY??

remus: there’s literally a picture of us kissing above the fireplace…

harry: i thought it was a platonic kiss?? 😭😭😭

sirius: WE WEAR WEDDING RINGS

harry: I THOUGHT THEY WERE FRIENDSHIP RINGS

sirius: WTF IS A FRIENDSHIP RING??

remus: we celebrated our anniversary last week!

harry: i thought it was some sort of friendship anniversary 😭

sirius: omg i knew i joked that he would be stupid because james is his father but this… this is another level

i made this 😭

Pansy: Okay, game time, we’ll go around the room and introduce yourself. Hermione, you go first
Hermione: All right, my name is Hermione, I’m a Muggleborn
Pansy: Yeah, yeah, great name! So are you into girls or guys?
Hermione: Well, I’m into everyone
Pansy: That’s lovely, yeah, very nice
Ron: I’m Ron—
Pansy: Shhh, Ron, it’s not your turn yet. So, are you free this Friday, Hermione? Can I take you out on a date?
Hermione: Oh! Yeah, sure, I’d love to!
Ron: My name’s Ron—
Pansy: Ron, still not your turn. Hermione, should I pick you up then, say...7pm?
Hermione: Seven is good
Pansy: Great! It’s a date then!
Ron: Okay, so is my turn gonna come any time soon or do you two have to get married first?
Pansy: Ron, shush, so Hermione—
Ron: Oh for Merlin’s sake!