in california when you’re born your parents get the choice of a red hot chili peppers shirt or a sublime shirt. those are the two genders

the article just got better as i kept on reading

A WHOLE RAW POTATO THIS STILL KILLS ME

Hello, Tumblr peeps! I’m here!! Ask away…  

i would take a bullet for you britney

WHAT

cowards for not keeping it

look at the coast guard cheesing

STORY TIME:

I work in a decent sized, local, indie bookstore. It’s a great job 99% of the time and a lot of our customers are pretty neat people. Any who, middle of the day this little old lady comes up. She’s lovably kooky. She effuses how much she loves the store and how she wishes she could spend more time in it but her husband is waiting in the car (OH! I BETTER BUY HIM SOME CHOCOLATE!), she piles a bunch of art supplies on the counter and then stops and tells me how my bangs are beautiful and remind her of the ocean (“Wooooosh” she says, making a wave gesture with her hand)

Ok. I think to myself. Awesomely happy, weird little old ladies are my favorite kind of customer. They’re thrilled about everything and they’re comfortably bananas. I can have a good time with this one. So we chat and it’s nice.

Then this kid, who’s been up my counter a few times to gather his school textbooks, comes up in line behind her (we’re connected to a major university in the city so we have a lot of harried students pass through). She turns around to him and, out of nowhere, demands that he put his textbooks on the counter. He’s confused but she explains that she’s going to buy his textbooks.

He goes sheetrock white. He refuses and adamantly insists that she can’t do that. It’s like, $400 worth of textbooks. She, this tiny old woman, bodily takes them out of her hands, throws them on the counter and turns to me with a intense stare and tells me to put them on her bill. The kid at this point is practically in tears. He’s confused and shocked and grateful. Then she turns to him and says “you need chocolate.” She starts grabbing handfuls of chocolates and putting them in her pile.

He keeps asking her “why are you doing this?” She responds “Do you like Harry Potter?“ and throws a copy of the new Cursed Child on the pile too.

Finally she’s done and I ring her up for a crazy amount of money. She pays and asks me to please give the kid a few bags for his stuff. While I’m bagging up her merchandise the kid hugs her. We’re both telling her how amazing she is and what an awesome thing she’s done. She turns to both of us and says probably one of the most profound, unscripted things I’ve ever had someone say:

“It’s important to be kind. You can’t know all the times that you’ve hurt people in tiny, significant ways. It’s easy to be cruel without meaning to be. There’s nothing you can do about that. But you can choose to be kind. Be kind.”

The kid thanks her again and leaves. I tell her again how awesome she is. She’s staring out the door after him and says to me: “My son is a homeless meth addict. I don’t know what I did. I see that boy and I see the man my son could have been if someone had chosen to be kind to him at just the right time.”

I’ve bagged up all her stuff and at this point am super awkward and feel like I should say something but I don’t know what. Then she turns to me and says: I wish I could have bangs like that but my darn hair is just too curly.“ And leaves.

And that is the story of the best customer I’ve ever had. Be kind to somebody today.

some of you may be aware of the facebook guide explaining how to make rainbow spaghetti.

welp, i’m 100% sure that no one has a better dad in the entire world than i do

??? i want blue spaghetti„

god dammit my mom made spaghetti tonight this is bullshit.

WAIT WAT. HOW HAVE I NOT THOUGHT OF THIS??

I showed this to my dad after it got 80,000 notes, and he sometimes still Googles “rainbow spaghetti dad” to excitedly show people that he’s “Tumblr famous” now.

Let rainbow spaghetti dad live on!

breakfast just got a lot easier

is this real?!

how to create drake’s one dance

This was art

you can tell he do music

This is SO disrespectful to that beat maker. 😩😩😂

Why he always exposing drake like this lmfaoooo

I love this shit

Ranata Suzuki (via wordsnquotes)

my best friend just called me to ask what color he should wear to prom and I was like “um?? idk??” and he was goes “well we have to match, so like what color is ur dress??” but he never asked me to go so I was kinda confused so I told him “hey, yeah since when are we going to prom?” and the line goes silent for a bit and he very quietly whispers “shit. I forgot to ask u”

IMAGINE YOUR OTP

Putin “taking notes” during Obama’s speech.

If obama was speaking I’d do the same thing

While it’s very possible he’s doodling, let us not forget that Russian Cursive apparently looks like this:

So it is very possible he just has messy handwriting (look at how he’s holding the pen) and is in fact taking notes.

Or he could just be doodling.

I’ve never seen Russian cursive and now I can’t stop laughing. 

This kind of thing is why cursive is a horrible idea.

Russian doctors notes written in cursive. Pretty sure Putin is actually taking notes.

My eyes….

i guess their writing looks like they were rushin

STOP

Hedonist Poet (via hedonistpoet)

why do ppl think its ok to waste my time

One more time for the people in the back

you can fly that shit rag of slavery and treason and not get arrested but protest for black lives & you get brutalized AND arrested.

PREACH