my favorite work memory from this store will always be “hey remember when the subway inside the store closed down and they let me take a bunch of their shit for free and now it lives inside my house?”

my life is a joke

Real life sims 4 career ulockable furniture

listen this isn’t rat related but I’m going off the walls right now this is literally so fucking funny

orange bear puppet: i think tutter’s looking a little tired, don’t you?

tutter (mouse puppet): [panting and screaming]

mordecai and rigby stop kindating squidbob or you're FIRED

you know who else is kindating squidbob?

im stumped. fire away muscle man

a wizard turns John into a wooden bowl

mistreating him

petting him

squishing him

petting him harder

tbh i didnt know you were supposed to be jerking off while you look at porn

2. sure save in the fucking stinky folder whatever

I need to post the video for context I am NOT putting an actual gun in Dolby mouth. dont cancel me. but this is the funniest image of me ever taken

The Sorrowful Truth

You can tell that Laios has an accent. His letters are more squishy and soft and Marcille's are more angular. He pronounces a ㅁ like it's an ㅇ.

LIL B?

Can you watch this freaking thing for me

what happened to the skeleton war, you guys used to love the skeleton war

Wars over, son.

Finally got a clear shot of noonoo carrying her spring, it's her favourite toy

i cant believe you guys. NOT EVEN ONCE

This is a major public health victory and the result of years of work. I know the in thing on tumblr is to kid around about people being uncool for not having sex or going to the club or whatever but those things don't give you lung cancer or a myriad of other health problems. Cigarettes are bad and the only reason you think they're cool is big tobacco poured astonishing amounts of money into marketing.

Had a dream that Taylor Swift announced she was doing a "pronoun reveal" and all the annoying swifties were losing their shit for weeks and saying "I told you so" and then Taylor just tweeted "she/her"