dead inside💀

i got to visit you for the very first time today. i got to see the place where your body lies, and even though i know you're not there, i felt you today. i know your spirit is long gone, but it made me feel okay to just sit there and see your name there. i know you were a beautiful soul, and i wish i could have met you. i love you aunt kelley. to the moon and back. i'm so glad i got to visit you today. fly high my guardian angel. 💜👼🏻

six years ago this month, i met this absolutely amazing human being, and we instantly became friends. we talked every single day, and have become inseparable. over these past six years, ruby and i have faced hell, and come out swinging on the other side. i'm so entirely grateful to have this wonderful girl in my life, and even more so that i get to call her my best friend. we've been through so much together and we've had our ups and downs, but i wouldn't trade a moment of these last six years with you for anything. thank you for always being there for me, and loving me through it all. i couldn't ask for a better best friend, other half, or human diary. i love you to the moon and back dork. happy six years. 😘😍💜

God truly blessed me with the most amazing man in the world. 💓

darling don't you ever grow up. 👑💫

appreciation post for my best friend, and the one girl, and person, that has consistently been there for me through everything this past year. viv, you're the greatest. you don't give yourself nearly enough credit. you've been there to make me smile when I didn't think I ever would again. you've listened to me groan and complain and be upset, and never once given up on me. I'm so blessed to have you, and I love you so much, my little hellion. 💘 #bestfriend

words can't describe how much I love this little girl. you have my whole heart baby girl💘.

you're a once in a lifetime kind of guy. the kind of guy that most girls spend forever trying to find. the guy I can be completely comfortable and goofy with. the one that thinks I'm beautiful when my hair is a mess and I have no make up on. the one that loves me no matter what happens. I'm so in love with you, and I will be forever. 💘

"we are as indestructible as we believe ourselves to be. when adults say 'teenagers think they are invincible' with that sly, stupid smile on their faces, they don't know how right they are. we need never be hopeless because we can never be irreparably broken. we think that we are invincible because we are. we cannot be born, we cannot die. like all energy we can only change shapes, and sizes, and manifestations. they forget that when they get old. they get scared of losing and failing. but that part of us greater than the sum of our parts cannot begin and cannot end, so it cannot fail. so, i know she forgives me, just as i forgive her. Thomas Edison's last words were: "it's very beautiful over there". i don't know where there is, but i believe it's somewhere, and I hope it's beautiful" miles halter~ looking for Alaska.

always.

I hate the way you talk to me, and the way you cut your hair. I hate the way you drive my car, I hate it when you stare. I hate your big dumb combat boots, and the way you read my mind I hate you so much it makes me sick, it even makes me rhyme. I hate it...I hate the way you're always right. I hate it when you lie. I hate it when you make me laugh, even worse when you make me cry. I hate it when you're not around, and the fact that you didn't call. but mostly I hate the fact that I don't hate you, not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.

sometimes you just need to sit back, and try to relax. no matter what might be going wrong, you've got to find something good to focus on. in all the chaos of life, you've got to find serenity.

it's late, and I find myself laying here thinking about you. thinking about all the ways and reasons that I love you. you're my best friend, and my human diary. I can tell you everything, and I know you'll never judge me over it. I love you because you make me glad to be alive. I love you because no matter how I'm feeling, you can always make me smile. I love you because you make even the worst days feel better. most of all, I love you because you loved me when I couldn't love myself. you showed me how to love myself, and you showed me how wonderful I truly am. I love you in every single sense of the world, and I am so grateful for everything you do for me. you changed my life from the moment you walked into it, three years ago, and I am a better person because of it. you know my story, and you know every thing about me, yet you never let that change the way you see me. I love you because you accept me for who I am, and never judge me on who I used to be. you know that I want a better future, so you don't hold my past to me. I love you because you make me proud of who I am. I love you because you support me in every thing. I love you because you trust me, and you open up to me. i love you more than I'll ever be able to express, and I'm so eternally grateful to have you. I love you because you are so unapologetically you. 💘

you're the best part of me. you're there for me when I things get so bad that I don't think I can take anymore. you're the one person that I know I can tell everything to, and I won't ever be judged. we're not perfect, but we work through everything that tries to break us. you're my best friend, and my boyfriend. you see things in me that I never would. you're the guy that treats me like a princess, and thinks I'm beautiful even when I look like death. you know me better than anyone alive, and you still think I'm amazing. I'm so amazed by you every single day, and always so grateful that you're mine. I'm so grateful that we've been able to work through the things that have tried to break us apart, and only come out stronger on the other side. you truly are the best part of me, and of my life. I love you to the moon and back sweet boy. 💘😍

once in a lifetime, someone comes into your life, and makes you realize why nothing ever worked out with anyone else. they're there for you when you're dealing with hardships, and they never let you go through anything by yourself. they come into your life, and they show you that you deserve so much better than what life has been giving you. three years ago when I first met Ethan, I had no idea that he would ever mean so much to me. for a while he was just the guy I had math class with, and eventually he became my best friend. I never would have imagined that I would end up falling so in love with him. honestly, he's the best thing that's ever happened to me, and the most amazing person that has ever walked into my life. I'm happier with him than I have ever been in my whole life. he makes every day brighter and more colorful, and I know he'll never let me go through anything by myself. he's the guy I want to have by my side for the rest of my life. I know people say "you're young" or "you don't know what love is yet", but I know what this is and I know that I want this every day for the rest of my life. I love you so much Ethan Ryan hill, and I always will. 💘

everyone seems to always be moving so fast. take a while to slow down. spend some time out in nature. don't ever take life for granted because you never know when you could be taking your last breath. appreciate the little things like beach days, and even the flowers outside. there is beauty in everything. always make sure you see it. life is precious, live it.

I know this is an old picture, but I wanted to post it because it just makes me happy. lord knows what you were looking at. this picture captures my whole world in one frame. I'm so so so grateful that you're in my life ethan. thank you for being so wonderful to me. I love you. 💘

it's a little late, but I wanna wish this loser a very happy birthday. ethan, I'm so great full that you're in my life. you've been there for me through so much crap, and none of it has ever made you think differently of me. you're a blessing in my life, and i will forever be thankful for you, even when I want to strangle you. you have no idea how much you mean to me. you're an amazing best friend, and an even better human diary. thank ou so much for always being there for me. I can't believe you're 19, wow you're getting old. 😂. anyways, happy birthday, I hope it was great. lots of love from me, and B. 💓.