So my latest obsession is apparently the official twitter for the US Consumer Product Safety Commission, which is about half recall announcements for various shitty amazon products and half…..memes? pseudo-memes?? works of surrealist art??? what do i even call these

Whoever made these is either a random middle-aged government worker who’s spent enough time with Young Internet People to be at least 60% sure what a meme is or a Gen Z artistic genius and i can’t decide which

the cheese always falls off the top shelf if i open the door too fast

this is truly a magnificent beautiful picture of cheese falling down

Its like cherry blossoms cascading from trees in the wind

i found it y'all

biggest tng fail was not having a spot-centric episode where she explores the enterprise

Dash Thing ™

Episode where an alien threat disables every humanoid on the Enterprise and then there's a Baby's Day Out style sequence of events where Spot makes their way to the bridge and accidentally fires a photon torpedo at the alien ship

or what if Data is the only one still conscious but also incapacitated so he has to pspspspsps Spot through the comms to go to the bridge and fire a photon torpedo at the alien ship

"Initiating emergency protocol Delta-4-Tango-Alpha. Puss puss puss, here Spot." the flat tones echoed from the comms in an eerily silent ship. Spot started awake and trotted out to from the Soft Room, looking around for their Dad. She heard Dad's voice...she meowed to announce themselves. When she got to where Dad sounded like, she didn't see Him. She say down and meowed again. The Door was.....open? There were lots of smells out there, but Dad said-

"Good cat. Puss puss puss. Come on."

@derneuegottin

i love paintings that look as if they have ghosts in them

this painting by andrew wyeth has got SO many ghosts in it. most andrew wyeth paintings have ghosts in, but this is off the scale!

this painting by dragan bibin has only one ghost as far as i can tell, but it's a really scary ghost (the dog thinks so too)

this painting by meraud guevara looks very peaceful, but unfortunately it has a ghost in it. i can't tell you where, but it does

you might think you can see the ghosts in this dorothea tanning painting, but you're wrong. the little girls are just ordinary girls. the actual ghost is behind one of those doors.

marvin cone. for fucks sake just look at it

just did my evil deed for the day (moved the bookmark in my dad's book back by one page)

my sister just walked into my room, showed me this post on her phone, and went "what is wrong with you?"

“I’ll catch you in the end”

(via)

Red panda energy

patrick.

Forgot this important piece of information

Delicious, finally some good fucking food ____ Kitchen nightmares / Ratatouille crossover we all deserve

I think the problem with the Supernatural Creature Dating Sim genre is that they always dilute their potential appeal by casting too wide a net. Like, more power to those who want to get busy with the entire Dungeons & Dragons Monster Manual, but my experience is that most folks are in the market for a more focused experience. Let's see a dating sim where every single potential partner is a wizard. Give us a dating sim devoted to seducing werewolves. I want a dating sim for people who exclusively want to fuck skeletons.

"But what about variety" if anything, the problem with supernatural creature dating sims that give you exactly one dateable example of each creature is typically lack of variety – you're generally stuck with whatever the most archetypal pop-cultural version of each critter is. Plus, it's not like fantastical monsters have canon origin stories, so you can get a lot of mileage out of variation within an archetype.

Like, just to pick a random example that's been cited in the notes, you want to date slime creatures? Here's your cast after a whole five minutes of thought:

Have them present as big tiddie slime girls if you really must – like, I fully recognise what audience we're aiming for here – but variations on a theme are where your bread and butter is.

The slime girl forms should be an optional thing. There’s a set of toggles in the menu to determine whether they’re fully slime, fully slime girl, or shifting between the two, with separate options for in public and in private.

I mean, if we're going to that much trouble we really ought to complete the circle and have a toggle for slime boy forms, too.

i used to have a running gag on twitter where i would tweet "i'm going to draw a horse" and then proceeded to draw a horse. here is a compilation

Iconic Tumblr Blorbo : Round 1

You FIGHT against Miette?? You freeze her body like a an ice cube? oh! oh! Jail for little man Jail for little man for one thounsand years!!!!

A snake story, based on an experience I had while I was in Florida.

Nick Offerman Answers the Web’s Most Searched Questions –WIRED, 2020

Reached an extremely important milestone in my life by making a gigantic worm on a string, it‘s only downhill from here. Right after finishing her i wanted her to be bigger until i recognized my own hubris..

10 or 11 little ducks have been spotted crossing the dash board

English added by me :)

This is part of my ongoing Discworld jacket embroidery project. Of course Great A'Tuin has to be on there. And of course it has to be the biggest one of them all.

I'm going to put the finished product in my masterpost, but I'm so proud of the thing that I have to put it in an extra post beforehand. Enjoy!

Update!!!

Behold: the elephants! 😁

The turtle moves! Now it's just the "cargo" left. And the universe. Well.

Update 3: Why did I have to try single thread for the disc. Why. How did I ever think that was a good idea. This is taking aaaages.

I'd say never again, but I know myself too well...

Still trying to decide whether to outline the landmass with darker thread or not. It would make the lands more distinct - but it might also make it look more like a comic. If you have any thoughts on it, let me know. I'll only decide once I've finished the rest of the disc and that'll be at least a week, if I had to guess.

I finally had some time to continue and the disc is done! Now just some stars, planets, etc...