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flying terror

@kai-the-magpie

a-spec, they/it, a bird with a typewriter (please use tone indicators) https://en.pronouns.page/@Kai-or-Samuel

Nintendo putting out a surprise update for the 3ds--a console they no longer produce and have as of this year since ceased supporting altogether--which has the sole purpose of fucking over people who've hacked the console is yet another example on the huge pile of examples that Nintendo has a frankly bizarre amount of absolute, nonsensical, self-destructive loathing for anyone who doesn't immediately drop Old Thing in favor of buying New Thing

the hacking community produced a new hack for it within hours

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‘Our Town’s Libraries’ which I drew for the @nytimes recently… Speaking of libraries, I have a new book out titled REVENGE OF THE LIBRARIANS and I am visiting Brooklyn NY, Philadelphia PA, and Columbus OH with it in the next week. Visit tomgauld.com for details…

Some thoughts on my gender presentation and how it’s WILDLY different to pretty much everyone.

(I call myself a man, nonbinary, nonbinary masc, trans man, demigender & trans masc interchangeably btw. It’s somewhere in there)

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I was recently asked to name 3 of the Great Lakes during a mental eval and now I'm curious about just how standard it actually is for people to know them, so

There’s literally an acronym for this. HOMES. I would be very surprised to find out it’s not taught outside the immediate region.

It's not

The introductory “Hate” monologue from I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream, with AM voiced by the TikTok TTS

This is one of my favorite monologues in all of fiction, and I think the voice legitimately, unironically adds to the experience. With the modern connotation we now have surrounding this voice of faux cheeriness, machine generated empathy, machine generated “humanity”, to hear that voice declare utter despisal of life on earth for damning it… its poetry. It’s the only remake of I Have No Mouth we need.

Using tumblr is like living in a low class apartment building. You just get used to the landlord not fixing things, and then someone new moves in and you’re helpfully like “oh yeah don’t drink the tap water, it’s got stuff in it that makes you sick” and then your neighbor you’ve had forever goes “oh they took the stuff out actually” and you’re like “what? when was this?”

“like two years ago”

“you mean i could’ve been drinking the tap water all this time?”

“yeah. they gave us individual mailboxes too finally, you don’t have to dig through the communal bin anymore”

“are you for real right now?? i just redirected my mail, i didnt know”

and the new tennant is like “why did you guys even live here if it was so bad”

“we like it.”

“I kinda miss the communal mail bin tho”

“the perpetually naked guy got evicted though”

“i know, so sad. he was really gross”

“i mean, his cousin streaks through the commons sometimes and knocks on all the doors”

“oh yeah, hate that guy”

New Person: I just saw this weird guy in the lobby in a really creepy anthropomorphic Pikachu costume??????

Old Resident: yeah we have no idea where that guy came from. We’ve left messages with maintenance ‘bout ‘im but-

Other Old Resident: just don’t make eye contact and you should be fine.

“what are these strange markings in the paint?”

“Oh! Thats from the crab infestation!”

“The crab infestation?! Wow, glad they got that under control before I moved in.”

“Oh, no no, it was an intentional infestation.”

“Uh….”

“Yeah, we’re hoping they bring the crabs back next year. A lot of us made friends with those crabs.”

No, I’m not joking, he doesnt just look like him, I swear to God neil gaiman lives across the hall.

The apartment building throws holiday parties but not typical parties like for Christmas or Valentine’s day

Knives are decorating the walls for the Ides Of March.

There’s a community movie night held on October 3rd where tenants choose to watch either Mean Girls or binge watch all of Fullmetal Alchemist.

Every single apartment opens their windows and blasts Earth, Wind, and Fire on the 21st of September

November 5th rolls around and the entire building just erupts into inexplicable chaos

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“What’s with the floor?”

“Color theory. Don’t worry about it.”

“Why is the cemetery across the street partially dug up?”

“Ah, yeah, there was a problem with grave robbing witches a while back.”

“Why do you do [totally normal thing] this way?” “Oh, [totally confusing and illogical system] is how we’ve always done it. “You think we call it a Hellsite for fun?”

Weirdly anti-millennial articles have scraped the bottom of the barrel so hard that they are now two feet down into the topsoil

its so wild like “this generation with no fucking money is learning to prioritize essentials” and all these chucklefucks can write is advertisements for these companies

at least our jeans won’t tear at the seams after two washes

FUCK FABRIC SOFTENER IT’S UTTERLY POINTLESS

AND FUCK DRYER SHEETS LITERALLY NOBODY EVER HAS ENOUGH OF A PROBLEM WITH STATIC TO WARRANT PAYING OUT THE ASS FOR THAT SHIT

DO YOU WANT CLEAN CLOTHES? YOU DON’T EVEN NEED TO BUY FUCKING DETERGENT JUST MAKE YOUR OWN* IT’S SO GODDAMN EASY AND 80X CHEAPER

FUCK THE ENTIRE LAUNDRY INDUSTRY *Fuck The Entire Laundry Industry Recipe

1 cup Washing Soda (not Baking Soda. Different things.)

1 cup Borax (not Boric Acid. Also a different thing.)

½ cup - 1 cup grated bar soap (you can use literally anything. I often use Ivory because it’s easy to get and I find it works well, a lot of people like Fels-Naptha, which is an actual laundry bar. Some people use Dr. Bronner’s. Really does not fucking matter.) After grating your soap, combine all ingredients. That’s it. That’s the whole thing. Use maybe a ¼ cup per load.

^^^ I’ve done this for years now and it works as well as any store bought detergent

WHAT Thank you, tumblr user awfullydull! Your URL does no justice to the good advice you give!

Also you can MAKE your own washing soda very VERY cheaply.

Step one: acquire $5 bag of baking soda from Costco.

Step two: lay that motherfucking baking soda out on a baking tray.

Step three: bake the baking soda on a tray in an oven at 400° for 1 hour (to make the moisture evaporate, leaving washing soda)

Step four: revel in how easy and cheap it is to make your own washing soda, and maybe take a moment to be angry that the industry upcharges the fuck out of something that is so easy to make.

I see some of y'all complaining about static and/or wanting nice smelling laundry. Go to a craft store, find 100% wool yarn balls. If it doesn’t come in a ball, ask an employee to make it into a tight ball for you. Wash in the washing machine to make it felted. Remove from washer, add a few drops of essential oil to the ball, allow to seep in. Dry with clothing. Doesn’t need to be rewashed ever, and if it stops smelling, add few more drops of essential oil. Bam, reusable dryer sheets.

I love this post so much it’s filled with helpful advice, hatred, saving money, and fucking the system all in one

FUUUUUUUCK THE SY-YSTEM

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Also, there are very few general stain removers as good as using a little bit of dishwashing soap. It has to be a _soap_, though, like blue Dawn or Joy.

A good, cheap trick I know of for getting oil stains out is to rub them with chalk (yeah, plain white chalk) and let it sit – you will see the chalk soak up the oil if you check like a day later. Sometimes you have to repeat the treatment after you wash the chalk out, but it’s better than having to replace the clothing.

(Carbona brand specialty stain removers are very good for their specialties, fwiw, but for like 90% of stains a bottle of blue Dawn and a piece of chalk will do everything you need. Carbona has specialized ones for particular very difficult stains including wine, ink, and oil – the oil one is helpful when the chalk can’t work far enough into the weave of the fabric.)

Also! One cup of vinegar dumped right into the washing machine on top of your clothes helps them get cleaner, no matter what other products you’re using!

Do not use vinegar if you’re also using bleach though. You could create chlorine gas which is very dangerous if you breathe it.

Saving this for if I ever get to move out of my parents house

Saving this for if

I ever get to move out

of my parents house

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

ochako is good because she got into the most prestigious school in the country with the ability to make things float alone. like she had no connections, no money, and not even that op of a power. she was just like “im tired of watching my family suffer. i’m gonna get into the best school and the hardest course so i can make more money.” and then she did it. the absolute madwoman. it’s the basic equivalent of someone from poverty making it into harvard. like hell yeah,,, u go girl

some rich kid from ochako’s middle school who’s in the general studies class: you got into UA?

ochako: what, like it’s hard?

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let’s also not forget that in an entrance exam that over 10,000 kids had to have participated in (only 1 in 300 kids get in, so for each of the 36 kids that passed the entrance exam, 299 didn’t), she scored third over all. she scored third on an exam that over 10,000 kids took. she did that.

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thinking about this message from me mam that she sent me back when i was in uni. it literally is just a pinprick in the tapestry of life!!

Yes it’s very important for solidarity with workers but, and maybe this is an unpopular opinion, workers should have solidarity with poor customers. Like ignore shoplifting, be sensitive when ppl are using EBT cards, that kinda thing.

If you work retail and you worry about shoplifters I beg you to remember how little money you’re being paid to do this

and also no matter what your boss says to you, someone shoplifting will not cause your wages to be docked. if it DOES, then you can get in contact with a labor attourney, who will proceed to light up like a kid at christmas because they (and you) are about to get a big fat payday. that shit is ridiculously illegal.

I’m sorry, if you are an anti-choicer and you call a fetus a “pre-born child” I am just straight up going to laugh at you

I myself am a “pre death corpse” which is why I should not have to pay any bills you see