Don’t look, David. Don’t look.
Source: rundalek
I’m laughing so hard because I just opened Twitter and this is trending worldwide in all caps, like if I weren’t in this fandom I would probably be very worried right now
sixwingedcastiel-deactivated201
When a boy says he is on his period when his finger bleeds.
Random student: Hey where's Lupin?
Sirius: He's on his time of the month
Random student: Wait what?
Sirius: Hahaha I was just kidding he's a werewolf
Random student: Very funny Black. *leaves*
Sirius: Damn that actually worked. Told the truth so that he wouldn't know the truth
Sirius: Sirius Black you are a genius
a harry potter au where potions is taught by gordon ramsay
malfoycat
neville: *messes up his potion*
gordon ramsay: *holds neville between two slices of bread* what are you
neville: an idiot sandwich
iamthepureblindraven
no no no!
Imagine that this is Gordon Ramsay a la Masterchef Junior
Neville: *messes up the potion, realizes it, starts crying quietly*
GR: What’s going on?
Neville: *explains how he messed up*
GR: Oh gosh okay…we can fix this, don’t cry, see, it’s fine now? Just be more careful when you’re adding the Newt’s eyes, all right? Drop them in gently. There we go. No more tears.
Neville: *giggles wetly, wiping eyes*
mira-of-sassgard
Yes, he only screams when he’s dealing with people that claim to know what they’re doing and clearly dont, when he’s teaching he’s very kind and patient because they’re still learning.
He’d probably do the bread thing to Malfoy.
nononononono. I get that Malfoy is a bit of a twat, but he’s still a kid. It’d be the teachers fucking up that he’d have trouble with.
Ramsay: All you had to do was treat it with a fucking Beozar!
Slughorn: It was a stressfu-
Ramsay: How long have you been teaching potions?!
or
Ramsay: So you’re going to raise this boy SPECIFICALLY so he can die as part of your twisted little scheme?
Dumbledore: It’s for the greater good, professor.
Ramsay: The greater fucking good?! *holds two slices of bread either side of dumbledoor’s face* What are you?
Dumbledore: Am I, per chance, an idiot sandwich?
Ramsay: Yes, you fucking are.
Okay, now I can reblog it!
I've been waiting for this ever since I watched the episode. Thank you.
Behold, the worst written line of all time:
Aro laughed. “Ha ha ha,” he giggled.
-Stephenie Meyer New Moon
iheartmoonlight
Excuse me but
“His voice is warm and husky like dark melted chocolate fudge caramel… or something.” -EL James Fifty Shades of Gray
therealfeedback
Fifty Shades is a treasure trove of terrible lines.
“I feel the color in my cheeks rising again. I must be the color of the Communist Manifesto.”
“His erection springs free. Holy cow!”
“Holy crap! He’s wearing a white shirt.”
The fact it used to be Twilight fanfiction really comes through when you actually look up some of the text.
sixwingedcastiel-deactivated201
MishaForPresident
So my teacher thinks that Donald Trump would make a better president than Misha Collins.
I wanna prove to him than the internet does NOT agree with him.
I usualy don’t do this but REBLOG IF YOU THINK Misha Collins would make a better president than Trump
i’m pretty sure minerva mcgonagall has been secretly running hogwarts for years now, she just got a pay rise when she became headmistress
belowfable
they know it was you
When you’re not in the fandom but hear a gay ship went canon
The Hogwarts houses make cookies
Ravenclaw: mostly follow the recipe but will make slight changes as they go to improve the cookie. measure ingredients by weight. baking time is calculated to the second. the kitchen is pristine and there is a chart on the wall dictating whose turn it is to wash dishes. cookies are usually stamped shortbread or thumbprint cookies with strawberry jam.
Slytherin: only a handful of them know how to bake since most of them have house elves at home. cookies have various illness inducing potions baked into them and are then given away to first years. usually make sugar cookies decorated with the slytherin crest, but they're willing to use neon colored frosting with sprinkles once in a while to avoid suspicion. every so often they'll make peanut butter cookies and then offer them to students with allergies.
Hufflepuff: make best cookies in the school. they all work together to make the cookies and clean up afterwards and then share them with any students they know are having a bad day. cookies are usually chocolate chip with tons more chocolate chips than the recipe calls for, but they make sure that they make every person's favorite cookie eventually.
Gryffindor: they have absolutely no idea what they are doing but they are all in. there's flour everywhere. something is on fire. someone is screaming. at least one ingredient always gets left out. the cookies are misshapen and are placed too close together. the cookies are supposed to be oatmeal monster cookies, but no one is quite sure what they really are.
f00lishkia-deactivated20220713
HOLY SHIT WHY. I’M LAUGHING SO HARD FUCK!
I will pay money to have this masterpiece on my channel
consultingtimedemon221b
@markiplier what else would you pay with Mark, your IMMORTAL SOUL?!?
2008 was a better time…
mako-reaper
That one time the whole nation got rickrolled but no one was mad about it bless
yes-yes-this-is-me-deactivated2
SUPERWHOLOCK FEELS
dan, on buisness dinner: thank you guys for this opportunity. phil and i are excited.
them: actually we thought you guys could do this seperately-
dan, shoving breadsticks into his purse: sorry i have to go home right now immediately