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Tumblr Girl

@just-a-dream-130-blog

just a fangirl in a big world💙
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Hey I guess I wanted you to believe That nothing really mattered to me I told myself that if you were gone I’d just carry on But trying to move on only hurts It’s one step forward, and two in reverse But since the moment I let you leave All I see is you When I wake up You, when I talk You, when I lie down You, when I walk You, when I’m sleeping You, when I try to breathe (You just keep on haunting me) I’ll get over the way that you got over me I know that I’ll make it there eventually Get my heart to erase somehow And stop wondering where are you now If I gave it all to someone else instead Would you pack your bags and get out of my head? Someday I won’t even look around I’ll stop wondering where are you now

3 a.m. Thoughts (via i-daydream-of-paradise)

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I have this constant fear that when I like someone I get too intense or too involved in them and that’s what scares them off. I just hope I’ll find someone that won’t make me feel like I talk too much or won’t make me feel so anxious, but I think I have to become more confident and accept myself more first in order to find that person as those bad feelings are probably only in my head anyway.

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myheartisanoceanoffeelings

Going to Bed Angry

Wrapped in my blanket, all I could do was silently weep to myself as I felt frustration build up in my chest. Tears streams down my cheeks like rivers and I can’t seem to remember how to breathe, cause I’m hiccupping and strange sounds are coming out of my mouth as I let myself break completely down.

I thought I could sleep and forget about you, but even in my dreams I’m not safe from you. I’ll dream of your smile and the things I’ve always loved about you. Maybe I’ll drift to sleep tonight, but I won’t sleep much.

When I wake the next morning you’ll be the first thought to form in my mind. The reality will hit me like a wall and I’ll stare at my phone waiting for your ‘Good morning, babe.’ text. Maybe I’ll decide to lay in bed and let our argument process. Maybe I’ll continue to cry and call my girl friends. Maybe I’ll collect the broken pieces of me scattered all over the bed and try to go on as if it’s a normal day.

I’ll wonder where you are and what you’re doing. I could just reach over and send you a text but I’m not strong enough or maybe it’s my pride. I’ll try and I’ll try , but at the end of the day when I’m alone in my bed , I’ll miss you. I’ll keep wondering where it all went wrong.

Maybe it was because we loved too passionately. Maybe it was your fault or was it mine? Who knows anymore, I don’t even know what our fight was about anymore.  All I know is I just want you to hold me.

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Jemile Weeks runs into the dugout with second baseman Andy Parrino and catcher Stephen Vogt after the victory over the Texas Rangers September 15, 2013.