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Late

@jrad1219

I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing. Semi-closeted bisexual millennial disaster. But my dog is cool.
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idk who needs to hear this rn but suffering is not noble. take the tylenol

One time when I was younger I was refusing to take headache medicine and my mom said “the person who invented that medicine is probably so sad you won’t let them help you” and now every time I find myself denying medicine I just imagine the saddest scientist making those big wet eyes like “why won’t you let me help” and whoop then I take the medicine

thesaltyspice-deactivated201901

I’ve been seeing a lot of anti-Nazi ones, which is great, but I felt like we needed one to show our support for the Jewish community.  

all you goyim I follow - I see you reblogging this and it warms me.

cumplane au

AMAZING 🤣🤣❤️❤️❤️❤️

[Image descriptions in order: a Reddit post on r/TIFU (Today I Fucked Up) by u/ArrMarriageAvoidance, titled "TIFU By telling my parents I was gay to avoid their arranged marriage proposals". The post says:

So I'm pretty straight, maybe slightly bi if we count femboys. Let's get that out of the way first. I'm also an Indian American male around 26 years of age I'd also like to clear up some misconceptions around arranged marriage. A lot of non Indians seem to think it's literally your parents choose who you marry and that's that, but that's not really the case. Instead it's more like your parents tap their network to find potential partners for you, if you like each others pics then you guys meet in person and then you decide whether or not you want to get married. So basically your parents are Tinder and you get a meeting or two to decide whether or not you want to get married. It's not quite as bad as many of you think it is, but the whole process feels super rushed and I'd rather date someone before I figure out if we're compatible or not

Anyways, my parents have recently been getting on my case about getting married. Apparently I'm getting older, need to settle down and give them grandchildren or something like that. Basically every time I see them (which is fairly often since they live close by) they have a new potential match for me, a picture of some new girl and ask me if I'd be willing to meet her.

It's honestly super annoying, but I'm too non confrontational to really put my foot down and say "I don't want an arranged marriage", after all if I do there'd be an argument or at minimum some interrogation about why I don't want one.

Anyways, I was thinking of ways I could get them to stop harassing me about getting married and the idea in the title popped up in my head. I decided it'd be a lot easier to just come out as gay then to explain why I didn't want an arranged marriage. My parents were fairly conservative but weren't the types to disown their kids, and if I just said I was gay I'd have a solid reason to not get an arranged marriage - I didn't like girls

Soooooooooo that's what I ended up doing last time I was visiting. They were showing me pictures of some girl and I just looked them in the eyes and said "Mom, dad, I'm gay". They got really quiet and awkward and asked me if I was sure and I said yes. My mom told me they'd love me no matter what and to do what makes me happy. My dad was a lot more awkward and quiet but later gave me a similar talk about how he was a bit uncomfortable with the idea, but recognizes that times are changing and I should do what makes me happy.

Overall I did feel kinda bad because of how genuinely my parents seemed to respond to me, but was happy with the result, they stopped giving me arranged marriage proposals and stopped showing me pictures of girls

That is until last weekend. I visited them as usual and was greeted by my mom who was more excited than usual. She sat me down and pulled out a binder with a bunch of pictures of guys. Apparently my parents had spent the last month or so looking for any and all gay Hindu Indian men who I could potentially marry. So now I guess I'm dealing with the exact same shit but instead of being greeted with pictures of cute Indian girls I get to see pictures of gay Indian dudes instead. Fuck my life lol

At this point the plan is to either find a girlfriend and tell my parents she totally turned me straight or maybe marry a twink or smthn idk

TL;DR: Told my parents I was gay so they would stop pestering me with arranged marriage matches, start potential gay suitors instead]

[An update post in the same subreddit, titled "TIFU By telling my parents I was gay to avoid their arranged marriage proposals [UPDATE]". The post says:

Hey everyone! I don't know if you remember me but I'm the dude who came out as gay to avoid an arranged marriage

Anyways, I have an update for you guys!

I read all the comments on the original post, from the people telling me to just tell my parents, questioning whether or not I was really straight, laughing at the admittedly fairly funny situation I'd gotten myself into and a couple of people who were straight up mean

At the end of the day though posting here probably gave me the final push to do something. The weekend after I'd made the post, I visited my parents as always and resolved myself to tell them the truth. However when I got there my mom as always pushed the binder in my hands and I kinda lost my resolve to tell her. I decided to just play along

It was then that I remembered the people on this thread who made fun of me for liking femboys and questioned whether or not I was really straight. I kinda took that to heart and decided to look at the binder of dudes in earnest to see if liked any of them. Tbh I'm really glad I did. Most of the dudes were unattractive as expected, but I found a dude on there who I legitimately think is cuter and more feminine than the vaaaaast majority of girls I've seen. I told my mom I liked him and she kinda joked around asking me what the point of being gay is when I wanted a dude who looked like a girl anyways 🗿

She talked to his parents, we had a meeting set up over Zoom and overall it went really well! Me and him have a bunch of common interests (we're both massive weebs and history nerds) and he also disclosed that he apparently crossdressed in private which only made me like him more

In the end though we both decided we didn't want to rush into marriage and wanted to do a dating trial run of sorts. I told my parents and.... THEY WERE FINE WITH IT. My dad literally just told me that as long as we have marriage as an eventual goal and don't have sex before marriage they didn't mind if we dated.... Y'all literally this whole shitshow could've been avoided Imfao (though I'm kinda glad it wasn't)

Luckily he lived in the same state as me, but he was still a 3-4 hour drive away, so mostly we've just had discord calls and spent time together gaming for the past few weeks. This Saturday though we finally managed to meet up in person and have a date and honestlyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy I think I'm kinda in love. Dudes cuter than any girl I've ever met but unlike most girls he's actually into the same things I am.

Anyways we ended up having a great day out on Saturday and I ended up staying at his place over the weekend (though surprisingly I kept my promise to my dad and somehow avoided having sex lol)

Anyways yeah I'm now back home and extremely happy with my decision to lie to my parents (then again is it really lying if it turned out to be true?). I really really do like him and will prolly ask him to marry me a couple months from now if nothing goes wrong. TL;DR - guess I really was gay all along]

[A windows XP error popup, which says "Task failed successfully."]

So I’ve been enjoying the Disney vs. DeSantis memes as much as anyone, but like. I do feel like a lot of people who had normal childhoods are missing some context to all this.

I was raised in the Bible Belt in a fairly fundie environment. My parents were reasonably cool about some things, compared to the rest of my family, but they certainly had their issues. But they did let me watch Disney movies, which turned out to be a point of major contention between them and my other relatives.

See, I think some people think this weird fight between Disney and fundies is new. It is very not new. I know that Disney’s attempts at inclusion in their media have been the source of a lot of mockery, but what a lot of people don’t understand is that as far as actual company policy goes, Disney has actually been an industry leader for queer rights. They’ve had policies assuring equal healthcare and partner benefits for queer employees since the early 90s.

I’m not sure how many people reading this right now remember the early 90s, but that was very much not industry standard. It was a big deal when Disney announced that non-married queer partners would be getting the same benefits as the married heterosexual ones.

Like — it went further than just saying that any unmarried partners would be eligible for spousal benefits. It straight-up said that non-same-sex partners would still need to be married to receive spousal benefits, but because same-sex partners couldn’t do that, proof that they lived together as an established couple would be enough.

In other words, it put long-term same-sex partners on a higher level than opposite-sex partners who just weren’t married yet. It put them on the exact same level as heterosexual married partners.

They weren’t the first company ever to do this, but they were super early. And they were certainly the first mainstream “family-friendly” company to do it.

Conservatives lost their damn minds.

Protests, boycotts, sermons, the whole nine yards. I can’t tell you how many books about the evils of Disney my grandmother tried to get my parents to read when I was a kid.

When we later moved to Florida, I realized just how many queer people work at Disney — because historically speaking, it’s been a company that has guaranteed them safety, non-discrimination, and equal rights. That’s when I became aware of their unofficial “Gay Days” and how Christians would show up from all over the country to protest them every year. Apparently my grandmother had been upset about these days for years, but my parents had just kind of ignored her.

Out of curiosity, I ended up reading one of the books my grandmother kept leaving at our house. And friends — it’s amazing how similar that (terrible, poorly written) rhetoric was to what people are saying these days. Disney hires gay pedophiles who want to abuse your children. Disney is trying to normalize Satanism in our beautiful, Christian America. 

Just tons of conspiracy theories in there that ranged from “a few bad things happened that weren’t actually Disney’s fault, but they did happen” to “Pocahontas is an evil movie, not because it distorts history and misrepresents indigenous life, but because it might teach children respect for nature. Which, as we all know, would cause them all to become Wiccans who believe in climate change.”

Like — please, take it from someone who knows. This weird fight between fundies and Disney is not new. This is not Disney’s first (gay) rodeo. These people have always believed that Disney is full of evil gays who are trying to groom and sexually abuse children.

The main difference now is that these beliefs are becoming mainstream. It’s not just conservative pastors who are talking about this. It’s not just church groups showing up to boycott Gay Day. Disney is starting to (reluctantly) say the quiet part out loud, and so are the Republicans. Disney is publicly supporting queer rights and announcing company-supported queer events and the Republican Party is publicly calling them pedophiles and enacting politically driven revenge.

This is important, because while this fight has always been important in the history of queer rights, it is now being magnified. The precedent that a fight like this could set is staggering. For better or for worse, we live in a corporation-driven country. I don’t like it any more than you do, and I’m not about to defend most of Disney’s business practices. But we do live in a nation where rights are largely tied to corporate approval, and the fact that we might be entering an age where even the most powerful corporations in the country are being banned from speaking out in favor of rights for marginalized people… that’s genuinely scary.

Like… I’ll just ask you this. Where do you think we’d be now, in 2023, if Disney had been prevented from promising its employees equal benefits in 1994? That was almost thirty years ago, and look how far things have come. When I looked up news articles for this post from that era, even then journalists, activists, and fundie church leaders were all talking about how a company of Disney’s prominence throwing their weight behind this movement could lead to the normalization of equal protections in this country.

The idea of it scared and thrilled people in equal parts even then. It still scares and thrills them now.

I keep seeing people say “I need them both to lose!” and I get it, I do. Disney has for sure done a lot of shit over the years. But I am begging you as a queer exvangelical to understand that no. You need Disney to win. You need Disney to wipe the fucking floor with these people.

Right now, this isn’t just a fight between a giant corporation and Ron DeSantis. This is a fight about the right of corporations to support marginalized groups. It’s a fight that ensures that companies like Disney still can offer benefits that a discriminatory government does not provide. It ensures that businesses much smaller than Disney can support activism.

Hell, it ensures that you can support activism.

The fight between weird Christian conspiracy theorists and Disney is not new, because the fight to prevent any tiny victory for marginalized groups is not new. The fight against the normalization of othered groups is not new.

That’s what they’re most afraid of. That each incremental victory will start to make marginalized groups feel safer, that each incremental victory will start to turn the tide of public opinion, that each incremental victory will eventually lead to sweeping law reform.

They’re afraid that they won’t be able to legally discriminate against us anymore.

So guys! Please. This fight, while hilarious, is also so fucking important. I am begging you to understand how old this fight is. These people always play the long game. They did it with Roe and they’re doing it with Disney.

We have! To keep! Pushing back!

Someone reblogged this saying they'd never heard any of this before and they didn't even know how to begin verifying it, so let me help!

Here's a 1995 article from the NYT about Disney putting this policy into effect after promising to do so in 1994.

Here's a wikipedia page about Disney's unofficial Gay Days and how they've been protested by Christian groups.

I tried to find the book I read, but honestly so many different weird evangelical anti-Disney books came up when I was googling that I can't be sure which one it was. 🙃

It feels taboo as a childfree person to admit this but I actually do have concerns about who is going to take care of me when I'm old. The elder care system in our nation relies A LOT on the unpaid care labor of adult children. I just don't think that's a good reason to have kids.

"But you'll have more money!" does not completely put this to rest for me. Neither does "Buy care insurance!" Even if I can afford direct personal care, who is going to advocate for me to get it? Who is going to navigate bureaucracy for me when I'm 80?

"If you do have kids, there's no GUARANTEE that they'll take care of you when your old!" That's true, but doesn't solve my problem.

I think childfree people get very defensive about this question because its used as a kind of "gotcha!" against us, but I actually do not feel we can afford to be in denial about this reality. Based on current trends of more people in their 30s stating they intend to be permanently childfree, we are going to see a huge wave of childfree adults hitting the eldercare system at once in a few decades. Childfree people in their 30s should be advocating around eldercare NOW.

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this ^^^^

Medical diversity is key.

This is so important in all fields but especially the medical profession. Being able to connect with patients and identify that they aren’t engaging with information is vital to patient care

Plants what now

I knew they could hear noises but apparently they MAKE noises too

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Cats knocking over houseplants just got a lot more vindictive

SHUT UPPPP

Reblog this picture of me holding a Family Size box of Honey Nut Cheerios? I’d really appreciate it.

How can I say no to such a great photo and such a polite request?

i will always support this post

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freshrosemary

@mooserattler back on my dash!

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Why isn’t this at a million notes, yet, Dante???

I’m not sure. Hey lovely people who have taken me over half way to a cool million! If you’d like to reblog again, I’d love that, if not, I still love you, and hope you’re having a great day. I’m gonna go do some stand up tonight.

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god come on we’re so close. this is like the only meaningful thing that this website could ever achieve

this photo of OP holding a Family Size box of Honey Nut Cheerios is so beloved to me

“In four years of medical school, three years of residency training, and nearly 30 years in practice as a family physician I have never been asked “what is the definition of a woman?”

Seems obvious that one could just look at the genitalia. You’re either a boy or a girl, right? Well, not always. Although it’s rare, many people are born with ambiguous genitalia. The OB/GYN and the pediatrician are simply unable to determine the sex. Historically, in consultation with the family, a sex would be assigned. Turns out that often as not the child would ultimately identify with the sex they were not assigned.

So it must be the chromosomes. The 23rd pair in humans is designated XX in females and XY in males. The Y chromosome determines male characteristics, so you are either a boy or a girl, right? Well, not always.

In embryology the default setting is female. The Y chromosome normally triggers male development. Ever heard of testicular feminization syndrome, now more properly referred to as androgen insensitivity syndrome? Sometimes an XY baby is born with essentially normal female external genitalia. The body simply does not respond to androgens associated with the Y chromosome. As the child grows and enters puberty there will be normal female breast development and other feminine characteristics. Unless genetic testing has been done at some point, the abnormality is not discovered until the teenage daughter presents to the doctor with concerns that menstruation has not started. Examination will reveal that the vagina ends in a blind pouch, no uterus, and undescended testes. They are often very feminine - cheerleaders, beauty pageant contestants, etc.

Nearly everybody is a “normal” XX or XY, has anatomy to match, and is perfectly at peace with themselves. But not everybody. Several studies have identified how the sexual diversity between men and women does not exclusively involve the genitals, but also the development of different brain areas. And just as genitals can be ambiguous, or not match what XY would predict,so can the brain in some instances develop in a different direction than the genitals. Animal studies suggest this is likely due to atypical levels of sex hormones in the womb.

One of several such structures studied in the human brain have involved an area of the limbic system known as the nucleus of the terminal stria. The volume of this area appears to be influenced by the stimulation of sex hormones during brain development, and in men the volume of this area is greater than in women. Scans of this area in transgender women (genetic/anatomic men who identify as females) resemble that of non transgender females. In this matter gender identity develops from the complex interactions between sex hormones and brain during its development; moreover, this appears to be genetically predetermined and is not influenced by hormonal stimuli during the adult phase. It is important to understand that at this point it is not known for certain what causes gender dysphoria or incongruence, just as we don’t know for certain what makes someone gay or for that matter, left handed.

Gender dysphoria often begins in childhood and can lead to severe distress, depression, and suicide. Treatment includes thorough psychological and medical evaluation and psychotherapy. Hormonal treatments in children are designed to delay puberty until decisions about desired gender characteristics can be made. The treatments are not permanent and are REVERSIBLE. Hormone treatments are not given to prepubertal children and in fact are not started until Tanner stage 2 of puberty. Sex change (gender reassignment) operations are not done on children. (Rare exception might be in the case of ambiguous genitalia where surgery may be done to make genital appearance more consistent with the genetic sex).

Unfortunately there are many people who cannot or will not understand that someone different from themselves might really be different for a real reason. I recently watched a video of a Fox News personality guffawing, in an arrogant and grotesque display of not knowing what one does not know, about how "woke liberals" were looking into the science of what makes someone a man or a woman. I hope the information provided here explains why that question is not quite as simple as it sounds.

It is also unfortunate in Texas that people with political power seem to think that trans people just want to get on the girls' track team

to win a lot of medals or get in the girls' rest room to watch them pee. Governor Abbott, Lt Gov Patrick, and AG Paxton have shown profound ignorance and cruelty in decreeing treatment for these kids to be child abuse. Even right wing columnist Mona Charen called Abbott's behavior "malice masquerading as policy making". They really no different than lunchroom bullies.

The American Academy of Pediatrics, American Academy of Family Physicians, American Medical Association, American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, and the Endocrine Society have expressed outrage that government is inserting itself into a matter that should be left to families, patients, and their doctors. There are well established evidence based procedures that have been in place for decades. This is not a new phenomenon and it is not a fad. Treatment saves lives. Denying treatment is cruel.

I would hope that someone will share this with a conservative friend. For most of us it seems ridiculous that a guy would think he is a woman, or a woman to think she is a man. The human brain and human body are complex and wondrous and get it “right” almost every time, but sometimes they get it different. And different should not be wrong, and different people and their families should not be attacked by their own government.”

- Joe McCreight, MD

zachdoeslife-deactivated2020040

Important discoveries being made over here.

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oh my god😂

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leiutenant-treble
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invisiblespork

[audio transcription: So I’m sure we’ve all seen the videos recently of these things *squeezes the honking chicken several times* little chickens. Um. Well, so I discovered recently that if you pull the head off and then pull the noisemaker out it’s the right size that you can stick it in the end of a trombone mouthpiece. And then *deep breath* *the loudest, most horrible blatting noises* Yeah.]

Has science gone too far

At black mesa we say: “science will never go far enough” so to me no not yet
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I was doing some photos for a talent agency, and I thought I'd share them here.

Would you hire this man?

adhd is so embarrassing ur basically like “I have to have fun right the fuck now or I’m throwing myself off the roof” 90% of the time and you also have very little control over this

This was the single most important thing for me to start understanding re: my undiagnosed ADHD, and it's the thing no one tells you except other ADHD sufferers. My brain's reward system is so broken that boredom rapidly becomes indistinguishable from a depressive episode. There's no healthy, normal ability to experience something as simply being a little dull--as soon as my brain isn't getting regular hits of stimulation, I start clawing at the walls. This is what makes working in a structured environment and initiating tasks so difficult for me, not malice or other character flaws.

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What makes it worse is that, if you're like me, when you were growing up, the only way your authority figures knew how to perceive this was "they're just goofing off," and therefore, would deprive you of anything remotely stimulating until you'd done your work, thinking that -- if it worked like it would with an NT kid, you'd do your work faster so you could get back to having fun.

Instead, they just pulled the plug on any tiny bit of power you had running to your necessary brainwaves and put you into longterm shutdown mode.

But then....you grew up...with only that method for coping ingrained into you. So no matter how much you may know logically, now, that you have to have the "fun/interesting/challenging" cord plugged in for your brain to have any juice at all, you feel guilty for having to plug that in FIRST instead of as a reward for doing Adulting. So you just sit there, unplugged, not getting anything done.

Or maybe that's just me.

even the most supportive and well meaning people in my life struggle to understand how painful lack of stimulation is, how immobilizing executive dysfunction is, and how i cannot feel satisfaction the way they do. the number of times i’ve been told “won’t it feel so nice to accomplish it and have it off your plate?” and having to explain that i don’t feel relief or pride when i finish a task, just exhaustion, and that’s part of why it’s so hard to even start it