yeah I guess it's good to fill creeper-made holes but that wasn't exactly what I was expecting
Wait, it got better.
He does this a lot, to my deep surprise in undergrad:
For reference, the reason nobody likes this book and you can press tofu with it is that it’s about 1600 pages long.
It’s also, by all accounts, the origin of Cousin Throckmorton
It’s also, by all
accounts, the origin of
Cousin Throckmorton
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
Name: Little Beepo
Skill: Fucking Miserable
Quote: Please let me have some grease from the stovetop. I’ll cry if you don’t let me have some grease. I need it.
I feel like if humans swallowed rocks like birds do to help grind up food we'd have so much fun with it.
Can just imagine all the girlies on tiktok going "I know this is a bit controversial but I honestly love using limestone as a gastrolith. Not only can you readily forage it but they are just so pretty when smoothed out after regurgitating them"
and then all the comments would be like " girl 😭 😭 calcite dissolves in stomach acid!! Just use quartz if you want a pretty gastrolith like 💀"
I like this site. Y’all just shotgunning counterfactual timelines
i did a redraw
1986-1993 Toyota Supra
do you have a nemesis named boottea?
I feel like Light Yagami trying to answer this
*dark shadowed closeup of eyes* Can't say yes because that's not funny. If I say no then it is an invitation for someone to create a parody blog. If someone creates a parody blog then I will be able to banter with them, but if shit goes south I may be culpable for any fallout. Do I make a quip about how Boottea sounds like booty? No, far too pedestrian. Do I invent a false backstop and run with the joke? No, I will fall flat. I could ignore the question, but I do like the creativity and think it needs to be rewarded with an engaging response. Am I overthinking this? Should I just leave it? No, then they will know I had nothing. I cannot quit now. It is no longer about the response itself: its about sending a message. So, what message do I send? Something relatable, which sidesteps an actual response. A meme, perhaps. Something that says, "I'm awkward, but in a self-aware way". Jesus, I am overthinking. This is probably how a death note character would plan a tumblr response. Wait
more-notes-than-you-deactivated
wild animals don’t have “mutuals.” you know what they have? predators and prey. and to me, the blue site is nothing but the serengeti on a hot afternoon
princessvexus
The unforgiving serengeti claims another individualist.
Compilation of people holding things that shouldn't be held, please add more if you have any
@is-the-snake-video-cute looks like a coral snake (blunt nose) but double checking- is it ?
That's indeed a coral snake, good ID!!
This thread is full of the luckiest people on the planet, I think. Also goes to show just how calm even venomous snakes are - coral snakes rarely bite unless you're actively harassing them - and how important it is to make sure your ID as non-venomous is 1000% certain before picking up any wild snake.
When the Arizona Iced Tea hits
Someone add a gif i'm on mobile
1967-1973 Datsun 510
Can you please identify this one too?
(lightly based on?) 1967-1972 Mazda Cosmo (based on the rotary engine? also huh. whuhhh.)
@identifying-cars-in-posts hope this helps (:
welcome to ‘no note bungus’. reblog and you will feel a sense of accomplishment and goodwill wash over you
• An Oxford comma walks into a bar, where it spends the evening watching the television, getting drunk, and smoking cigars.
• A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.
• A bar was walked into by the passive voice.
• An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.
• Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”
• A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.
• Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.
• A question mark walks into a bar?
• A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.
• Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out -- we don't serve your type."
• A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.
• A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.
• Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.
• A synonym strolls into a tavern.
• At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.
• A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.
• Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.
• A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.
• An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.
• The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.
• A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned by a man with a glass eye named Ralph.
• The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.
• A dyslexic walks into a bra.
• A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.
• A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.
• A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.
• A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the bartender nearly chokes on the irony
- Jill Thomas Doyle
A zeugma walked into a bar, my life and trouble.
the signs they have in hell in good omens r so silly
please do not lick the walls
Compilation
Forgetting another good one
never not thinking about Poison Jr
Every 21st century piece of writing advice: Make us CARE about the character from page 1! Make us empathize with them! Make them interesting and different but still relatable and likable!
Every piece of classic literature: Hi. It's me. The bland everyman whose only purpose is to tell you this story. I have no actual personality. Here's the story of the time I encountered the worst people I ever met in my life. But first, ten pages of description about the place in which I met them.
Modern writing advice: Yes your protagonist should have flaws but ultimately we should root for them and like them from the beginning :)
Charles Dickens: Here is the worst ugliest rudest meanest nastiest bitch you’ve ever met in your life.
Modern writing advice: Make sure your POV character goes through a significant arc! Make sure they are changed by the narrative! Make sure they learn a lesson!
Narrators of every book of the 19th century: the lesson I learned is these people fucking suck, sayonara you freaks
Modern writing advice: It’s all about the character overcoming obstacles and learning! They learn their lesson so they can fix their mistakes and make good choices in the future! It’s a character arc! It’s called growth! Readers love it!
Everyone from ancient times through the 19th century: would you like to watch a Guy fuck up twenty times in a row
"someone help me budget this my society is dying"
"spend less on harrassing children"
"no"
Reminds me of this lol
Zapatistas are awesome fr
Yeah, I bet he was supported by his family, peers, and government.
Yeah, I bet he was
supported by his family,
peers, and government.
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.