Speak not, lie hidden, and conceal                the way you dream, the things you feel.                Deep in your spirit let them rise                akin to stars in crystal skies                that set before the night is blurred:                delight in them and speak no word.

               How can a heart expression find?                How should another know your mind?                Will he discern what quickens you?                A thought once uttered is untrue.                Dimmed is the fountainhead when stirred:                drink at the source and speak no word.

               Live in your inner self alone                within your soul a world has grown,                the magic of veiled thoughts that might                be blinded by the outer light,                drowned in the noise of day, unheard…                take in their song and speak no word.

Berserk (1997)

“One day you will heal in such a way that you’d be so glad you chose to stay. Every morning you’ll wake up with the feeling that something good is about to happen to you each and every day. The light coming from the sun won’t be too bright for your once too tired eyes, and the taste of your coffee will remind you that you’re kind of like magic. You’ll learn how to appreciate the simple things in life, like dancing in the kitchen, singing along to a happy song, and loving all the people who inspire you to be strong. You’ll smile at all your mistakes and failures in the past and forgive yourself for the choices you made, especially the ones that are wrong. One day you will heal in such a way that you’d be so glad you chose to stay. Because things will feel simpler and the problems you’ll be facing will be much gentler from all the pain you experienced that made you stronger. You’ll see hope in days when the sun refuses to shine, and you’ll feel comfortable in the wisdom that bad days do pass, and all you have to do when you’re stuck in the middle of the storm is to keep breathing and trust that things will eventually get better. You will get better.”

“I’ve always put others before me. I’ve always been considerate of their feelings and I’ve always tried to make sure they were happy, even if it might have been at my own expense. I’ve always made sure to try to cheer them up and help them with their worries or problems because I hate seeing those I care about hurt. Yet it’s funny. I’m hurting so much more than them but nobody is reaching out to me. Nobody is helping me. Nobody is trying to make me feel better. No matter how much I talk about my hurting, everyone is too focused on themselves because they think they deserve to put themselves first. They act as if they’ve prioritized others far too much by now and thus have the right to be selfish. Just because I have been stuck on the same problem all this time, it doesn’t mean my pain amounts to less than the new several problems they have encountered in that same period.”

1. Start small, and take the first step. You are on a journey. This is just the beginning. You only have to start.
2. Have faith in yourself. At least you’re brave enough “to try”. If you’re patient and keep trying you will get there in the end.
3. Make a list of all your fears so they’re not formless and vague. It is easier to fight them if you know what you are fighting!
4. Accept that life is often hard, and fear is natural and normal. Every person who succeeds will have to face and deal with fear.
5. Remind yourself of your successes and the ways in which you’ve changed. You have triumphed and succeeded over obstacles before.
6. Remind yourself of those who love you and believe in you. They know that you can do it – so derive some strength from them.
7. Imagine how you’ll look and how you’ll feel when you’ve succeed. It is WORTH making the effort. Don’t give up: you’ll reach your goal!

“Continue to embrace the things that make you unique even if it makes others uncomfortable. You are enough. And whenever you’re feeling doubt, whenever you want to give up, you must always remember to choose freedom over fear.”