Diana’s genes really just said fuck it and vacated the premises I never seen nothing like this in my life

Kids say the darnest things! (Source)

iconic 

I made an old lady blush today at work because she ordered two senior coffees and I said “SENIOR ? I’m sorry miss, i’m going to have to ask to see some ID.” and she covered her mouth and went “Oh dear me” and couldn’t stop smiling

You are the best kind of person, and I want to be like you one day.

there is no legitimate reason Brooklyn nine nine can't be in the marvel universe

Consider: Jake Peralta and Foggy Nelson having an immediate on sight “IT’S FUCKING *THAT GUY*” reaction when they happen to meet in a courtroom.

Consider: That one time Steve Roger’s brought in a guy he caught mugging some tourists and Amy almost sucked the air out of the entire building while she flipped.

Consider: Rosa really wants to bust a real vigilante but all she’s ever got is some little highschool kid in this handmade red and blue thing. It wasn’t even satisfying. >:c

Consider: Gina has Tony Starks personal number in her phone with the programmed ringtone “Stupid Hoe”. No one can figure out why and honestly, no one really wants to know.

Consider: There’s a new guy at Terry’s gym named Luke. He seems nice, but man its a miracle that he didnt break his foot after those weights fell on him.

Consider: Nick Fury coming into the station to retrieve Clint after he was arrested for fighting with the track-suit gangsters. He and Captain Holt stare at each other in silence for five minutes, and then Holt tells Jake to let Clint go.

okay.  I need this as fanfiction or comic immediately.

Bank, London

date the person who says, “have fun, be safe, and call if you need anything” not the person who gets mad at you for going out w/o them

partnership not ownership

Honestly in all of these stories these poetic white men who somehow end up immortal get so bored and miserable because they just sit in their mansion all day doing whatever it is they need to do in order to sustain their immortality and then they just throw lavish parties and organize orgies or whatever and then they’re like “why am I sad I eat three course meals and have at least one orgy daily what MORE could I POSSIBLY need??”

Like???? Damn go for a walk. Do you even KNOW your neighbors? Get a dog and take it to the park. Set up an elaborate fish tank. Go skiing like you’ve been alive for 200 years and you’ve spent 180 of it in your house looking at paintings and drinking wine with other rich assholes no wonder ur life sucks my man.

Buy a canoe.

this post was specifically targeting dorian grey.

Bernice King, the daughter of Dr. Martin Luther King and Coretta King, posted this on her Facebook page.

ok universe, i’m ready to feel good things. make me feel good things.

whenever i post this it works  reblog if u want to feel good things & the universe will bring u something sweet 

Anonymous (via wnq-writers)

My killer: any last words asshole?

Me: Alexa play work by Rihanna

girls don’t like boys, girls like other girls in suits

KIDS ARE SO RUTHLESS

“You look slow and easy to kill”

Even though he’s dead. Mufasa knows how to dad joke

I’m gonna apply for a job at Gordon Ramsay new restaurant and I’m gonna get it

I submitted my application and resume

I GOT THE FUCKING INTERVIEW

My interview is in a few hours. I got this but wish me luck

reblog for good luck