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@jessimousold

Jess, 16 //She/Her// All hail the Crow Father 
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shelbys-advice-blog
Anonymous asked:

I want to live by myself when I move out of my parent's place but I'm really afraid of money problems? I'm afraid that the only place I can afford will be in the ghetto and it'll all be torn apart and I'll only be allowed to eat one granola bar a week. I'm really stressing out about this. I don't know anything about after school life. I don't know anything about paying bills or how to buy an apartment and it's really scaring me. is there anything you know that can help me?

shelbys-advice-blog answered:

HI darling,

I’ve actually got a super wonderful masterpost for you to check out:

Home

Money

Health

Emergency

Job

Travel

Better You

Apartments/Houses/Moving

Education

Finances

Job Hunting

Life Skills

Miscellaneous

Relationships

Travel & Vehicles

Other Blog Features

Asks I’ll Probably Need to Refer People to Later

Adult Cheat Sheet:

Once you’ve looked over all those cool links, I have some general advice for you on how you can have some sort of support system going for you:

Reasons to move out of home

You may decide to leave home for many different reasons, including:

  • wishing to live independently
  • location difficulties – for example, the need to move closer to university
  • conflict with your parents
  • being asked to leave by your parents.

Issues to consider when moving out of home

It’s common to be a little unsure when you make a decision like leaving home. You may choose to move, but find that you face problems you didn’t anticipate, such as:

  • Unreadiness – you may find you are not quite ready to handle all the responsibilities.
  • Money worries – bills including rent, utilities like gas and electricity and the cost of groceries may catch you by surprise, especially if you are used to your parents providing for everything. Debt may become an issue.
  • Flatmate problems – issues such as paying bills on time, sharing housework equally, friends who never pay board, but stay anyway, and lifestyle incompatibilities (such as a non-drug-user flatting with a drug user) may result in hostilities and arguments.

Your parents may be worried

Think about how your parents may be feeling and talk with them if they are worried about you. Most parents want their children to be happy and independent, but they might be concerned about a lot of different things. For example:

  • They may worry that you are not ready.
  • They may be sad because they will miss you.
  • They may think you shouldn’t leave home until you are married or have bought a house.
  • They may be concerned about the people you have chosen to live with.

Reassure your parents that you will keep in touch and visit regularly. Try to leave on a positive note. Hopefully, they are happy about your plans and support your decision.

Tips for a successful move

Tips include:

  • Don’t make a rash decision – consider the situation carefully. Are you ready to live independently? Do you make enough money to support yourself? Are you moving out for the right reasons?
  • Draw up a realistic budget – don’t forget to include ‘hidden’ expenses such as the property’s security deposit or bond (usually four weeks’ rent), connection fees for utilities, and home and contents insurance.
  • Communicate – avoid misunderstandings, hostilities and arguments by talking openly and respectfully about your concerns with flatmates and parents. Make sure you’re open to their point of view too – getting along is a two-way street.
  • Keep in touch – talk to your parents about regular home visits: for example, having Sunday night dinner together every week.
  • Work out acceptable behaviour – if your parents don’t like your flatmate(s), find out why. It is usually the behaviour rather than the person that causes offence (for example, swearing or smoking). Out of respect for your parents, ask your flatmate(s) to be on their best behaviour when your parents visit and do the same for them.
  • Ask for help – if things are becoming difficult, don’t be too proud to ask your parents for help. They have a lot of life experience.

If your family home does not provide support

Not everyone who leaves home can return home or ask their parents for help in times of trouble. If you have been thrown out of home or left home to escape abuse or conflict, you may be too young or unprepared to cope.

If you are a fostered child, you will have to leave the state-care system when you turn 18, but you may not be ready to make the sudden transition to independence.

If you need support, help is available from a range of community and government organisations. Assistance includes emergency accommodation and food vouchers. If you can’t call your parents or foster parents, call one of the associations below for information, advice and assistance.

Where to get help

  • Your doctor
  • Kids Helpline Tel. 1800 55 1800
  • Lifeline Tel. 13 11 44
  • Home Ground Services Tel. 1800 048 325
  • Relationships Australia Tel. 1300 364 277
  • Centrelink Crisis or Special Help Tel. 13 28 50
  • Tenants Union of Victoria Tel. (03) 9416 2577

Things to remember

  • Try to solve any problems before you leave home. Don’t leave because of a fight or other family difficulty if you can possibly avoid it.
  • Draw up a realistic budget that includes ‘hidden’ expenses, such as bond, connection fees for utilities, and home and contents insurance.
  • Remember that you can get help from a range of community and government organizations. 

(source)

Keep me updated? xx

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Reblogging for myself

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bridgyrose

reblogging for those that follow me that may be starting to move out

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jessimousold

pfft im pinning this

jessimousold
wormcatwormcat
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wormcatwormcat

You are not broken

Whether you

have a disability
have a disorder
need accommodations
need medication
need therapy
have trauma
have scars
do not conform to society
or make mistakes

Your needs are important. You are beautiful and deserve love just the way you are.

jessimousold
ungalobrando-deactivated2022020

How the fuck do I get better

For Beginners

You are not your feelings. Feelings are something you have, and something you can learn to cope with. Here are some tips how you can reduce negative, annoying or persistent feelings in your life, and how you can cope with them when they occur.

  • Making positive experiences
  • Do something enjoyable that’s possible every day (ex. read a few pages, doodle something, listen to your favorite song, sing in the shower…)
  • Change your life up a bit in a way that will help you experience positive feelings more often (ex. say hi to an old friend, join a club, try a new hobby, discover a new artist…)
  • Allow yourself to feel the positive things (ex. reminisce about the nice experiences you had before bed, focus on how good you feel in the moment, ask yourself how you’d name this positive feeling, what caused it…)
  • Reducing emotional and physical vulnerability
  • A house can’t stand without the base - Work on getting enough water, food, sleep, exercise and self care. Baby steps are completely fine. 5 hours of sleep are better than 4, two meals are better than one, etc.
  • Watch your health and take your medication
  • Avoid mood changing substances (drugs, alcohol…)
  • Take responsibility (ex. make small plans that you can and will do every day -> gives you a sense of control over your life and helps you believe in your own abilities)
  • Letting go of emotional baggage
  • Accept your feelings as a part of yourself as a person. We all have them!
  • Acknowledge that your feelings (all of them!) are allowed to be here, because they all have a job to fulfill!
  • Try not to judge your feelings, even if it’s hard! There’s a reason why they’re here.
  • Be open for your feelings. Embrace them. They will come anyway.
  • I have a feeling I don’t want - what now?
  • What am I feeling? (ex. angry, sad, guilty…)
  • What impulse does this feeling give me, what do I want to do? (ex. lash out, isolate myself, self harm…)
  • What made me feel this way? (ex. a fight, a bad grade, a mistake…)
  • What would be pros and cons of acting on my impulse? (ex. pro - lashing out would give me relief, con - it would have consequences…)
  • What decision do I make?
  • What skills or coping mechanisms do I need, if I need them?
jessimousold
20o1
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20o1

It's okay to:

feel sad

put yourself first

cry

outgrow people

talk about your feelings

re-make mistakes

struggle to accept help

take a break

say "no"

jessimousold
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thoradvice

i know it's hard to believe right now, but there is more to life than sadness and trauma and mental illness. there is love and joy and hope and so much more. there's so many incredibly beautiful little things to find happiness in every day you're alive, even if things aren't good right now. there are always sunsets to admire and movies to watch and dogs to pet. i know that life is hard, but it's full of incredible things in the everyday, things that tell you that you will be okay, that there is love always.

jessimousold
theskepticalwitch
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theskepticalwitch

Cleansing reminder:

Cleanse your crystals, your tools, your room, and yourself. We don't want that negative energy around us.

Ways to cleanse: Smoke cleansing, using moonlight, using rainwater or moonwater, using herbal water sprays, asking your spirits/deities for blessings, using your own energy, using sigils, using other crystals

jessimousold
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50 Self Concept Affirmations to use 💗

- “i love myself”

- “i am amazing”

- “i am filled with love”

- “good things always happen to me”

- “i am the luckiest person in the entire world”

- “the world is my oyster”

- “i am extremely confident”

- “i am the person that has it all”

- “i get everything i want”

- “my life is filled with happiness”

- “i am the main character”

- “everything always works out for me”

- “my mental health is amazing”

- “people treat me like royalty”

- “why is everyone so nice to me?”

- “i am worthy of love and respect”

- “i am extremely healthy”

- “i am always the first choice”

- “i deserve the entire universe and more”

- “i am god”

- “i am the most amazing person i have ever met”

- “excellence is my birthright”

- “i am extremely beautiful”

- “i am the epitome of human perfection”

- “i flourish in eveything i do”

- “perfection only exists in my reality”

- “i am perfect”

- “i am divine”

- “i am whole and complete”

- “i can do anything”

- “i am worthy of all my desires”

- “my life is filled with nothing but happiness”

- “i constantly attract good things into my life”

- “i am abundant in all areas of my life”

- “i constantly attract positive energy into my life”

- “i am the sculptor of my reality”

- “money comes to me quickly and easily”

- “i am beautiful from head to toe”

- “money constantly flows into my life”

- “manifesting for me is so easy”

- “all my manifestations come to me quicker than expected”

- “i experience all the luxuries life has to offer”

- “i accept myself”

- “i light up every room i walk into”

- “i am limitless”

- “i have finally found inner peace”

- “i always receive compliments”

- “people have always treated me like a priority”

- “i am a winner”

- “i have the face of an angel”

jessimousold
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calyx-y-gashideul

Crystals for Absolute Beginners

If you’re anything like I was a while back, you liked the idea of crystals, but didn’t know where to start. Here is list of the four crystals that I recommend for absolute beginners in the world of these precious stones.

Pointers before we get started:

  • I am still a beginner to crystals myself and would be happy to have expert input.
  • If you are spiritually sensitive and/or sensitive to energy, take it slow and steady. Work with one crystal at a time until you can handle more than one. I personally feel nauseous or sick to my stomach when I try and work with too many crystals at once because they carry so much energy.
  • Similarly, I feel sick when I “break in” crystals (like new shoes) that are new to my collection as I am intentional about using the stone and focusing on its healing properties. 
  • You need to cleanse AND charge your crystals.
  • Not all crystals cleanse and charge the same way. Please research what method of cleansing and charging works for the crystal you want to use before working with the crystal.
  • I would highly recommend starting your crystal journey with tumbled stones or smaller crystals. If you don’t end up using crystals, it wasn’t a huge investment to get a tumbled stone or two.
  • When choosing crystals in person, I tend to shuffle through the stones and look for the crystal that I am attracted to most. Find one that you like and that suits you.

Now let’s get started!

Amethyst

Amethyst is a classic crystal that a lot of people know about. However not everyone knows just how to use it. Amethyst is known to have healing properties that balance the emotional, physical, and spiritual bodies. It brings feelings of calmness and comfort. Amethyst can be used for meditation, prayer, or just keeping it in your pocket as a reminder to stay balanced and calm. I personally keep an amethyst tumbled stone under my pillow. I’ve found that I have been sleeping much more soundly throughout the night with it there. There are different kinds of amethyst, so don’t be afraid to do some research and find the amethyst stone that you like best! I cleanse my amethyst in distilled salt water sitting in indirect sunlight for a few hours. This cleanses and charges the amethyst. The crystal will fade in direct sunlight, so keep an eye on your crystal as you cleanse and charge, keep it in indirect sunlight.

Fire Agate

Fire Agate is a kind of Agate that is known for being a grounding, calming, and protective stone. It is said to build a sort of “force field” around you that deflects negative energy. Fire Agate can be used any way you want, however I found that when I kept it in my bedroom overnight, it drastically altered my sleep schedule. For this reason, I don’t bring it into my room. (I find that grounding and protective stones mess up my sleep schedule when in my bedroom overnight. Keep in mind that this could be a possibility for anyone with any kind of stone.) I cleanse my Fire Agate the same way I cleanse my Amethyst: soak in room temperature distilled water and salt placed in indirect sunlight for a few hours.

Dalmatian Jasper

Dalmatian Jasper is a great crystal for embracing your inner child and allowing yourself to return to a playful and curious mentality. It is also believed to be a stone that brings you into balance and alignment. Dalmatian Jasper can be used any way you choose, I personally like carrying it with me when I leave the house to keep me curious, which is grounding for me. The stone did not impact my sleep schedule greatly when I kept it in my bedroom overnight, however it did not help the way the Amethyst tumbled stone does. Dalmatian Jasper can be cleansed and charged the same way that Amethyst and Fire Agate can be.

Rainbow Obsidian

The name is sort of misleading for a black and/or very dark green crystal, I know. However this stone is wonderful for any crystal novice looking for healing in big ways. Rainbow Obsidian is a great stone for protection, grounding, and healing by bringing good things into your life. Similar to Fire Agate, this crystal is believed to put you in a protective bubble that deflects negative energy. I absolutely love just sitting outside on my porch, holding my Rainbow Obsidian, and praying. It feels like a fresh start to my day no matter what time of day it is. I do not keep Rainbow Obsidian in my bedroom at night, as it makes it hard for me to wake up in the morning and messes with my sleep schedule. Rainbow Obsidian can be cleansed the same way as the other three stones mentioned in this post. 

Those are the four crystals that jump out at me from my collection that I think would be great for anyone who’s on their spiritual journey but hasn’t touched crystals yet. I really hope this helps someone out there. Lastly, don’t be afraid to try new things! If you want a crystal that I didn’t mention, get it! There are no rules to your healing process.

Have a wonderful day!

~Bekah