These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. Its five-year mission: to explore strange new worlds. To seek out new life and new civilizations.

To boldly discover the most creative ways in the universe to say "Fuck Around and Find Out."

literally nothing funnier than a newly born aquatic mammal realizing they've been cursed to live in water

My favorite mermaid art is the one of a family photo with a mermaid mother and old sailor father and their sons are both reverse merfolk (human legs with fish heads).

This is the one!

It's by Jessica Warrick.

forbidden knowledge

Can we see this frame by frame? Please and thank you.

Yes Here Are All The Frames

THAT IS NOT WHAT WAS ASKED FOR

How dare you hide this in the notes

wow that last comment really does deserve to be front and center, it’s perfect

Man sees crab for the first time.

does he…

Live in the

Some fucking

mollusk

pulls up

sits on the floor and thinks about how the twins' extreme force sensitivity probably connected them before they even knew each other

(support me on kofi!)

One of my favorite hobbies is thinking about the fucked up implications of this fantasy world map my parents got me for christmas

[Image ID: photo of a map. On the left side of the map is Middle Earth, with the Shire and Mordor labeled. To the direct right of Mordor is Whoville.]

I FOUND THE FULL ONE AND ITS SO MUCH MORE CHAOTIC.

HYRULE SHOOK ME TO MY CORE!

THIS WORD HAS TWO KINGDOMS RULES BY A BEING IN A TOWER!

The existence of Oz and Neverland is wild too. Does this mean that there is a REAL Earth outside of this? Could Wendy hang out in Westeros?

“what if people transition and then regret it?” ok. let’s do that with everything. no more straight marriages until the heterosexual divorce rate is below the detransition rates

full res image to share 💜

Hey you good? you reblogged this like three times now.

10 actually i think

HEY WAIT A MINUTE!! Wasnt there a post like that? Like someone liveblogged being attacked and they just played possum because they felt awkward?? Or maybe they pretended to drown in someone’s pool just to be a dick and didn’t know when to stop until they were hidden in a closet. Or something

Am I making sense to anyone?

You are my hero for finding this

Another day in the Office

Surrealist humor sure is taking on a new flavor huh

I have finally identified my only two braincells.

what’s your favourite colour of the sky?

[ID: A fake poll with several options, each one without text and filled in a with different color to match the “do you love the color of the sky” post. End ID.]

Ahh compressed for our convenience, just what I like to see

Listen, you should never film strangers in public without their consent, but I swear there need to be fines or something for people who do that shit in some spaces. For example: I had to go to the ER last night, and some jerk filmed a woman who just came in and was clearly having an asthma attack. She immediately got to go back, and he was unhappy about that. Believe me, I get that it sucks having to wait when you're in pain, but you don't get to pick who deserves care when. The medical system in the US is a nightmare, and the ER could be the worst moment of someone's life. No one deserves to be recorded because some jack ass believes someone doesn't look like they need care.

This is fine to reblog. People who film strangers should be shamed if nothing else.

I know a lot of EFR instructors (Emergency first response, the people who teach CPR classes) who used to be ambivalent about this and now are firmly in the "fuck you fuck your phone category.

Maybe its demographics, EFR instructors do tend to be older and less online, but there's been a shift from voyeur filming being seen as irritating and tasteless to actively harmful.

I met one lady who had an entire section of her lecture based on how to divide labor in emergency and one of those steps was crowd control. If you are taking charge of an emergency situation, you delegate tasks. Point at one person and tell them to call 911, Point at another person tell them to warn traffic, Point at another person tell them to get the first aid kit if you know where it is. You assign small tasks to individuals instead of asking a crowd that way the task actually happens, and you're not sitting around 20 minutes later wondering why the ambulance is taking so long to show up and it turns out that everyone assumed someone else called.

Now there is another step. Pick a big dude and tell him to stop people from filming. Which is actually the tamest version of what she said, because this lady went on and on about how phones are fragile, light, small, pieces of computer equipment that can be easily punted into oblivion.

And yeah, she's probably the most vocal proponent of property destruction in the face of voyeur filming I've heard lately but she's far from the only person in emergency services who's frustrated with the eternal quest for viral videos of strangers pain.

And to be clear there is a huge difference between the paramedic who doesn't want you filming and the cop who doesn't want you filming.

One thing I love about Tumblr that wasn't a thing on Reddit is that I can just write whatever the fuck text post I want. No titles. No putting text on images. No algorithms or karma. Just fuckin splatter your mind onto the screen and people will see it. Like god intended.

It’s one of the best things.

My Post: haha in a fleeeeb beepo bingus kinda mood rn

Senior tumblrists:

We prefer tumblrinas

4 the whole crew bc i think its rlly cute when ppl help make battlejackets for their friends 🤝

we are gonna be vacuuming up this post for the next five years

It almost looked like they threw a fish upwards into water (the shadowiness of their hand) & it swam off causing a splash of glitter.