@jennytrout / jennytrout.tumblr.com
Hey friends! As we were all probably trying not to think about, E.L. James has released a sequel to The Mister, called, The Missus. I wasn’t going to pay any attention to it; James’s career is firmly heading to midlist now; The Missus didn’t break the top 100 on Amazon on its release day, and it didn’t make the lists. Finally, I thought. Finally, we are free. She’s not a cultural phenomenon, so…
This weekend, I saw something that I needed to see… probably ten years ago. It was a confirmation of something I already knew, something that any reasonable person would automatically land on as the truth from an objective standpoint. It’s a blog post by Dave Walsh titled, “Be Whoever You’re Gonna Be,” and I wish I could craft it into a sword or a hammer or something, bust into every indie author…
After many, many attempts to convince me to recap a particular book, my Patreon patrons have done it. They’ve finally done it. Our current selection is Modelland by Tyra Banks. Is it a memoir? Contemporary fiction? Nay. It is a YA Fantasy about a magical world called Metopia, in which a chosen few are selected to venture to a shining land on a mountain to become the most famous models in the…
Hi there! Quick update from the land of typing still hurts: it’s release day for the paperback and ebook versions of Taken By The Alpha King! He’ll never stop fighting to keep his throne…and her. Born into a secret society of werewolves and betrothed to a mate she didn’t love, Bailey Dixon made the choice to leave her pack for five years. Now, she’s back and fully committed to becoming the…
Episode two is up! And I have a Crave recap on deck for next week. I have to work speech-to-text still and wow, it requires extensive editing.
Sad news out of the book world: Book Depository is closing. Our amazing Trout Nation moderator has put together a list of my paperbacks that are still available to purchase there before the end of the month: Say Goodbye to Hollywood Nightmare BornFirst Time The BossThe Girlfriend The Bride The ExThe BabySay Goodbye to Hollywood Here’s the legal: These are affiliate links, so Tez gets a little…
DO YOU LIKE HORNY URBAN FANTASY ABOUT WEREWOLVES? Well, I have I got the book for you, coming May 2, 2023. Taken By The Alpha King is a collection of the first three seasons of my Radish app serial for readers who prefer a different format. Seasons four and five will debut on Radish soon after, so you’ll be able to continue the story there or wait for those to come out in paperback and ebook in…
Hey, everybody out there in Trout Nation! It is I, your long-disappeared Trout. And now, I’ve got hardware in my bones. My surgery went well. My recovery, not so much. I had this idea that someone was going to slice into my body, stick screws and sutures in there, reattach muscle, remove some bone, and I would take an Advil and put my feet up for a day before jumping straight back into work.…
2023 starts off with a… sure. Sure, why not.
Howdy, pardners. You may remember that in October of 2022, I got into a car accident. No, you know what, eff that, I’m not saying that I got into a car accident because I didn’t get into anything. I was minding my own business and someone else involved me in their car accident. And as a result, I have to have surgery. Did you know your shoulder could rupture? I do! The orthopedic surgeon I was…
Don’t Do This. Ever.: Authors Behaving FUCKING ABHORRENTLY
CW: Suicide (but not an actual suicide) I don’t really know where the fuck to begin this. I can tell you that there will be many, many swears. And by the end, you will probably be swearing, too. In fact, I think at this point, the sun itself should be shouting “FUUUUUUUUCK!” into the void of space. Remember when I said it would take something really big to make me do another Authors Behaving…
A blog post on the dangers posed to professional writers by AI writing software
As Artificial Intelligence (AI) becomes more and more prevalent in all aspects of our lives, it is natural to be concerned about its impact on professional writers. AI writing software has the potential to revolutionize the way we write, but it can also pose some serious threats to professional writers. The most obvious danger is the potential for AI writing software to replace human writers. AI…
Yes, your feelings about the USA Today Besteller List are about ego.
USA Today has announced that, due to a lack of editorial staff, the paper’s famed bestseller list is going on “hiatus.” Within hours of the news breaking, social media sites were already flooded with comments from disillusioned authors lamenting that if the paper doesn’t reinstate the list, they’ll never be able to obtain their coveted “letters,” a step long believed to be crucial for an author…
Merrily Unhinged Christmas Rant
I saw this after smoking a huge bowl: I should note that I’m not back to using Twitter. It was posted as a screenshot in the Dumb Bitch Juice meme group. That’s not important. What is important is that after forty-two years of relentless exposure to the song, my misunderstanding of the events of “The Twelve Days of Christmas” was corrected. The items described are not given to the recipient one…
Why your favorite authors are going serial.
When I announced the debut of Her Brother’s Billionaire Best Friend, I got a landslide of emails and Facebook messages that I was, frankly, expecting. Readers who, while being fans of my Abigail Barnette work, weren’t happy about its exclusivity to the new platform, especially after Taken By The Alpha King was only available on Radish. And the reason I expected this was because I was miffed that…
Jealous Haters Book Club: Crave chapter 15, “So Hell Actually Can Freeze Over”
This chapter did two things. One, it bored the shit out of me. Two, it made me more suspicious of something I was suspicious of before. Let’s get into it, as Doja might say, yuh. But keep in mind, this is going to be an intensely short recap due to the length of the chapter and the not much that happens in it. It’s basically all filler until the last page. (more…)
cw: grief It’s been over a year since I saw my best friend. The last time I saw her, she was at work. She worked the fabric counter at JoAnn’s. I try not to drive past JoAnn’s anymore. I went in to look for planner stuff with my friend Jess. They never have any good planner stuff at JoAnn’s, but I went anyway because Jill was there. When I left, I bought a decorative cowbell. I left it with…
R.I.P. to the stardrop that was passed from Willy Sr. to Willy Jr. for generations only for the farmer to chomp down on it right after taking it out of the mailbox
You go girl! 👏 Munch on that family heirloom!!
*Slaps roof of heaven and Earth* This bad boy can fit so many more things than are dreamt of in your philosophy, Horatio.
Had a dream that I was accidentally entered into a "Christian rap competition" and the only thing I could think to rap about was my current interest in pickling onions. The crowd thought my pickled red onion brine for Jesus rap was so cringe that they didn't even boo. The entire venue just went completely silent until I felt awkward and left.
This would have done numbers with Russian orthodox Christians you were just playing to the wrong crowd king. Protestants have no culture
"Are my pickled red onion bars wack? No, it is simply the protestants who are wrong."
