recoverr-deactivated20220605
maybe there is no best version of myself. just me, right now, vulnerable and tired and hopeful, willing to show up regardless of what it looks like.
I love so much stories of older siblings having to save their younger siblings from a magical kidnapping it's just. I'm too old to believe in magic and you're not but you're the one stolen and I'm the one who has to believe to get you back because our parents are too far gone, they'll never understand. You're my responsibility and I don't want you to be but when offered a choice to walk into the dark for you or to turn back I will always go on. I seem like such a grown-up powerful force to you but I'm just a kid myself. I'm scared and alone but somewhere out there you trust me to save you and I have to rise to that, I have no choice. I resent your existence. I love you. I will always come find you.
i wish there were more than 24 hours in a day and beverages were $1 and growing up didn’t hurt so much
i am at the very beginning of the rest of my life. this truth will not change with age
on love and devotion
unknown // richard siken, litany in which some things are crossed out // hera lindsay bird, I KNEW I LOVED YOU WHEN YOU SHOWED ME YOUR MINECRAFT WORLD // warsan shire // clementine von radics, the next time we talk on facebook // amal el-mohtar and max gladstone, this is how you lose the time war // k.c. cramm, christmas eve forever
(gripping bathroom sink) we are all going forward none of us are going back we are all going forward none of us are going back we are all going forward none of us are going back we are all going forward none of us are going back we are all going forward none of us are g
(gripping bathroom sink) i am young and learning how to live. i am young and learning how to live. i am young and learning how to live. i am young and learning how to live. i am young and learning how to live. i am young and learning how to live.i am you
they should make it easier
what?
Everything. All of it
Thinking about how Portrait of a Lady on Fire said that even if an encounter is brief, the love surrounding it can be lasting and it enriches your life and changes you and that’s never a tragedy
Crazy how we are everything that has happened to us but then you meet someone and you don’t see everything that has happened to them you just see them. And you both try to explain everything that has happened to you but your words and memories are so biased and oversimplified.
deer walks into a store and later brings her whole family for another visit 🛒
Horsetooth Store, Gas, and RV Park
when I found out my friends have no siblings I always ask isn’t that kind of lonely??? And they are always like idk not really and yeah u can’t miss what you’ve never known I guess but some nights me and my little sister will stay up late even though we both have class tomorrow and we will listen to fast car by Tracy chapman on repeat no talking just us quietly listening and I think that even if I never knew my sister I would still miss her somehow
growing up is an endless process of me looking back at younger versions of myself and being like…. wow she was so young. but look how well she did with what she knew
how lovely to think that there is a future me out there thinking this exact same thing about present me
thinking about “you haven’t met all the people who will love you” and like!!! you also haven’t found all the things that will make you happy!!!! there will always be new authors and musicians and artists whose work you will one day discover and love!!!! there will always be new hobbies and skills for you to learn and feel fulfilled by!!! there will always be new things around the corner that will bring sudden and unexpected happiness!!!!!!!!!!!
at times when hope is too big of a thing to have, curiosity (even clinical or small) is a very good placeholder
asking myself "why continue" & finding the answer is always, in some form, "i want to know what happens next", even if that want is tired or detached or outright morbid