“My lack of interest in seeing you is not a strategy. I don’t want to see you. Because I was always there for you and I cared for you and you walked away when you had absolutely no reason to. You’re untrustworthy so I don’t want to see you. You’re self centered so I don’t want to see you. You’re immature so I don’t want to see you. You’re weak so I. don’t. want. to. see. you. I am 100% certain that if I let you back into my life again you will hurt me again. You have changed so much from the person I used to know, and it’s all for the worst. So I don’t want to see you. This isn’t a ploy and I’m not sad I just don’t want you in my life. So don’t be upset next time when I walk past you and don’t even look your way. Don’t be upset when my eyes don’t light up when I see you. You don’t get me like you used to. Do yourself a favor and don’t even try to talk to me, it’s not even worth your time. The saddest part about this whole thing is that you have no one to blame for this but yourself. You may not realize it now, but one day you will regret your choices. I gave you so many chances and you messed them up in so many different ways. Now I walk around with a huge smile on my face and laugh louder than ever before. And honestly, for the longest time I was fighting the battle with myself wondering if you actually still cared. If you just didn’t know what you wanted. If you still thought of me. But guess what I realized you didn’t. Your actions proved nothing to me. I deserve WAY better than you. I deserve someone who actually wants me in their life. When you slammed the door shut, it opened so many others for me. It also opened my eyes because now I know you were never the best for me. Now that it’s over I realize I’m better off without you. And I honestly feel a little sorry for you. I moved on. I over looked your flaws. Your temper. Your selfishness. Your immaturity. I picked you every single time I wanted to be with you, but all you are now is a distant faded meaningless past. However you were never a waste of my time, you were just a realization that I could do better. So now, your name doesn’t make me smile anymore. I will admit in the beginning it was painful and hurt my feelings, but now I see the moments we had don’t have to be painful. You aren’t the only thing that matters. You aren’t as special as I once thought you to be. I gave you way too much credit, I was smiling in pictures without you too. So one day, I hope you realize everything I did for you. And for what? Nothing. At first, you were on my mind all the time. Then, I began to look at the situation differently. I started thinking about you less and less until eventually you were just another person in the room with me. I still think about you from time to time, but not so passionately. You’re just a boy I have some memories with. Kind of like the best friend from second grade that I don’t talk to anymore. Don’t get me wrong, I still cherish the time we did have together and I’m glad we tried and so what it didn’t work out, the whole situation just encouraged me to be even stronger. I don’t want you back because I have moved on and understand I am better off without you. I know I must love myself before I love another person. And being with you was not healthy for me. Being with you and appreciating you meant not appreciating myself. That’s how it is with everyone. In the end all we have is ourselves. When you broke up with me, I learned to move on and now I am extremely happy. So you have no right to try and work your way back into my life because you did this to yourself. You hurt me. You ended it with me. You made me realize I am a great person without you, and since we ended, my life has been onwards and upwards.”
M.M.S (via maknna)
