on tuesday i have a job interview for a place with a starting wage of 14 dollars, i'm so excited and i hope i get it
why'd you empathise the "sit"??? Do they not let cashiers sit where you live?????????????????

on tuesday i have a job interview for a place with a starting wage of 14 dollars, i'm so excited and i hope i get it
why'd you empathise the "sit"??? Do they not let cashiers sit where you live?????????????????
*me experiencing a stomach ache*
My brain, suddenly having graduated med school : oh boy, the situation is so much worse than I imagined! Seems like you're at stage nine, aka the deadliest stage, of I'mGonnaFuckingDie disease, the usual symptoms being tummy hurts a bit too much for a bit too long.
wifi : connected
Me : then fucking act like it.
man’s resisting the urge to petpet soooooo hard
OMG AHAHSVUGIC THE LITTLE HAND TWITCH AHAHSHGS
i feel like tumblr doesnt know about the pain and suffering that is english tap water,,,, girl there are stalagmites inside me
Lmao op lives in the south. The tap water up here is from fucking springs. It's so clean and fresh and has no stalagmites whatsoever. Cope and seethe southerner
My bones are so strong from all the chalk I've been drinking that I could mull you into a fine paste
You guys are like a two hour drive from each other
Don't mind me just sipping on some rocks,,
i feel like tumblr doesnt know about the pain and suffering that is english tap water,,,, girl there are stalagmites inside me
Yikes dude
*drinks italian tap water whilst wondering when I'll die because my square brain thinks I've got some kind of parasite partying in me*
absolutely shocked and upset that americans dont seem to know what "one of your five a day" is
this was drilled into every british childs skull for the last one billion years.
The fuck's "one of your five a day"????
Me on pinterest : oh, tumblr is full of funny and relatable people!
*actually logs onto tumblr*
Tumblr : hey, you actually came back! Don't know why you would, but you do you. Ah, and have a photo of this cringy twelve-year-old going through his emo phase!
Phone : 78%
Me : ah, how delightful, let me just..
*turns around for 0.2 seconds*
Phone : I'M ON ONE FUCKING PERCENT MOTHER PLEASE HELP-
why the fuck?
Sincerely,
Everyone else
HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF A BANSNA DIDN'T WANT TO EAT YOU BECAUSE UOY HAD A BRUISE HUH??????????????????????
.
SHHG DON'T GIVE THEMA IDEAS
I think most of my trust issues originate from those fake sneezes, like why must you betray me like this???????? I TRUSTED YOU