It just be like this sometimes

we all have that one homie who volunteers to take first watch that they might contemplate the heavens in solitude

Why are you taking your kitten for a ride at 12PM

Do you live in the Arctic Circle??

omg imagine being born and you are on a spaceship and everyone aboard is sooo so mad at you just because you burst out of some guy's chest to be born. like um sorry i've not been alive before i didn't even know that's not allowed please be nice to me um the spaceship floor is cold is no one going to knit me some little booties i am calling child protective services

You are forced to fight an identicle clone of yourself. They know everything you know and all of your skills and tactics. How do you win?

i go for the bals they would NEVER expect this

by talos this cannot be happening

people who market tumblr as a “fandom website” are missing the fact that the fandom tags are essentially unusable because you cannot venture into them without seeing a take so bad you want to throw up

THIS! We tag stuff but we don't go looking for it.

The worst invention of late stage capitalism is the screen on the gas pump that plays video ads at you. The best invention of late stage capitalism is the coke freestyle machine.

I think I experienced a worse one a couple weeks ago. Was on a flight, had one of those screens in the back of the seat... except it wasn't for in flight entertainment. It was for ads. And you couldn't turn off the screen either. So I'm trying to sleep on this red eye flight with a flashing screen 1 foot from my face.

if you had hijacked the plane because of that no jury in the world would have convicted you

his dark materials will literally always work bc every small child wants an animal companion that loves you most and goes on adventures with you and every adult wants an animal companion that can shoulder some of life’s immense psychologically damage for you. and you can pet it

And to tear down the feeble corpse of God! Every kid and adult wants that also!

the baseball we deserve

(this is the savannah bananas. they dance. they wear kilts. they Love The Boys. also they have a dance team made up of seniors called the banana nanas, a "dad bod cheerleading squad", the man-nanas, and a charity organisation focused on foster care called bananas foster)

Guys. Guys. Calculating tips. Just. Look at your bill. And move the decimal point one step left. That’s ten percent. Double that number. Now it’s twenty percent.

$100.00 bill? $10.000. Ten dollars. Double it. Twenty dollars. That’s a 20% tip.

$67.50? Now it’s $6.750. $6.75? Might as well be $7. Double it. Roughly $14. You’re not going to miss the change.

Please. I failed math three times

Bringing this back

Viggo Mortensen as Aragorn The Lord of The Rings - The Two Towers (2002)

😭😭 I love piggies so much

So all that time my mom said “your room is a pigsty” she was complimenting me

I thought everyone would appreciate knowing there was an update cause someone sent her a bouquet to decorate her place 🥺

Omg

I feel like someone in japan in the 1980s perfectly predicted the kind of thing tumblr would love in 2018

Visual representation of feeling yourself

@lgbtqcreators bingo challenge: 4/5 headcanon characters ↳ gwaine

shoutout to the lord of the rings lighting directors. bold move to let the audience see what's going on in nighttime scenes. i miss that.

"Where's the light coming from?"

"The same place as the music."