computer. reptile. nine inch nails. max volume. kill anything that moves

when google wont give me a streaight fucking answer

america is flat out the greatest country on earth

my fortune

[Image description: a blurry picture of a Chinese fortune cookie's fortune. It says: "Avoid compulsively making things worse." /End ID]

its not that blurry i tried really hard to get it in focus

WHAT YOU LOOKING MAN?

- MAN SLATHER

FORGOT TO COMMENT ,,,

WHOOPS !

NICE LOOKING MAN WOULD LOVE TO SEE HIM SLATHERED IN OIL ,, SALVE ,, ETC ,,,, WITHOUT THE DEATHSTICK !!!!!

- MAN SLATHER

????

NOTHIN TO SEE HERE,,, MOVE ALONG MA“AM !!!!

        - MAN SLATHER ;-)

wait wtf is cream soda

cause when we're creaming and popping...

we’re cropping?

we're peaming

Fuck with me

hmm…who will I suicide bait at the dog park today….

A small example of how my father really talks

remember to send email with NO ATTACHMENTS

- the buddhist emailer

Traditional ant names

Traditional ant names are based on one ant virtue as the first name and one ant “intimidating quality” as the last name.

For example:

do NOT kill a bug loose in your home. do NOT release it outside. mail it to me P.O. box 453 in LA CA. i teach them circus tricks. if my training doesn’t work i will eat it

I've had an ongoing science project for a few years now that I'd like to share. I've been leaving raw chicken breasts—real cheap, unregulated shit from the local mom-and-pop grocery store—out on my counter long enough for E. coli bacteria to develop. Then I microwave the chicken breasts and try to produce genetic mutations in the bacteria of each batch through microwave radiation, just in short bursts of 45 seconds per "rep" and maybe 3 "reps" per "set". The bacteria that do survive get fresh, raw chicken mixed into their feed and left to rest at room temperature for a few more days to grow. Then I just rinse and repeat until I see weird shit under the microscope. Sometimes I don't even need a microscope! Pic related, the fuzzy red mound is the modified E. coli (more obvious under a microscope). It's one of my most successful batches, a relative newcomer at only ten generations. I don't really microwave it any more because I'm pretty happy with it. This batch actually still has chicken inside, it's just completely covered in the bacteria "fur". Each bacterium is about a quarter the length and width of an eyelash. They aren't as quick at eating the chicken breasts as some of my other batches. I'm not sure how it happens, but between the actual chicken and the bacteria layer is some nasty chicken glob, like they slowly dissolve it or something. But this batch is definitely my "ambassador species" since it's pretty flashy with its beautiful maroon color and marimo-like appeal, and it doesn't make me sick too much. Anyone else doing something similar?

This thumbnail is everything

the court spymaster showing me a letter he intercepted from my least favorite vassal

8:54 AM

We no longer have mornings like this, do we..