Don't ever hesitate. Reblog this. TUMBLR RULE. When you see it, REBLOG IT.

DASHBOARD UNFUCKER V1.0

as 90% of desktop users have probably found out, today @staff released an update that for some insane reason COMPLETELY remodels the dashboard to replicate twitter's. this is of course in the wake of numerous other thoroughly hated changes and a continued refusal to fix any of the site's actual problems, half of which stem directly from site management.

HOWEVER, thanks to the power of jQuery, i was able to throw together a userscript that remodels the dashboard back to its original look almost perfectly.

here is my dashboard right now, with the script active:

and here is the old dashboard in separate tab container that hasn't received the update:

it's hardly perfect; i had trouble making it force reload to the fixed layout when switching between other pages and the dashboard, and it currently only fixes just the dashboard. it's also completely untested on browsers other than firefox, and chances are it looks a bit screwy on ultrawide monitors. but for now at least, it's a good fix.

the unfucker is a tampermonkey userscript. all you have to do to use it is install the tampermonkey extension, hit "create new script", and replace the default code on the page with the script (link here) and save it.

oh yeah, with the new size limit for .gifs this thing can finally be posted

what the fuck

I just….?

TREASURE THIS POST. IT ONLY APPEARS ON YOUR DASH ONCE IN A BLUE MOON I SWEAR

forget posting cringe to scare off Twitter folks, we just gotta make this appear to be the constant vibe here and we’ll be good skdjskksks

[ID: a pair of outstretched hands, offering a chess piece. End ID]

[ID: a pair of

outstretched hands, offering a

chess piece. End ID]

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

4. If the car pulls up to you run in the opposite direction.

5. Walk with your keys in your hands and keep a key between each finger

6. If they put you in the trunk kick out the headlights

7. If you get lost find a woman with a child. Never ask a man for help (this one was drilled)

That scream fire piece of advice is literally life saving

8. Watch your shadows and reflections, especially if someone is walking behind you. A split second notice is better than none and will help you.

Yes this last one really saves lives y'all I do it all the time

girls have to learn to view the world like international intelligence agents just to be safe walking down the street. smh.

guys pls pls pls reblog and girls pls pls pls be safe out there. terrifying and so sad that we have to worry about this on a daily basis

(I’m an enby, but, frankly, this is helpful for anyone.)

- always tell someone where youre at and an approx time when youll be back

Add text replacement words in your phone if possible. Something short and memorable that you can send quickly to people in moments of emergencies.

E.g.

I f ing hate that we need to reblog this, people suck, but this will save lives.

DO NOT SCROLL PAST

Being female fucking sucks but yes this shit is important for everyone

Also, do not walk close to walls. It will be easier for someone so walk past you and push you against it or corner you.

If your gut is telling you to cross the street or change your path, do it. Don’t risk it. Your body knows.

If you can, buy a large umbrella and walk holding it. Studies say that predators are less likely to attempt an attack on someone that could fight back. Keys around your knuckles is fine but you’ll need to get very close to do damage. Umbrellas are more precise.

Avoid wearing headphones if you are alone on an empty street. Look aware.

Again: Stay. Away. From. Walls.

Entering an uber alone? Call your father (or anyone you trust) and say “hey dad! Yep, I’m almost there, I’m sending you the route.” outloud. Then proceed to send them the route so they can follow the uber drive. This will most likely intimidate the predator.

If you see someone in an uncomfortable or possibly dangerous situation, walk up to them and say “Betty, oh my god, I haven’t seen you in so long!”. If she gets slightly confused, you can whisper and let her know you’re trying to help and that she should follow along. Walk together to another station or away from where you are. The man will most likely not follow. I have done this one 2 times and can be very helpful.

If you are unsure she needs help, you can pass her a note saying something like “hey, I noticed this man beside you is making you uncomfortable. If you’d like help, fake a sneeze right now and I will come up to you and pretend we are friends.” This is a long note, but its an example. Be discrete. If she follows along, proceed with the previous tip. This is helpful when you’re in a crowded train and you notice harassment.

Help your sisters. Trust them. Trust yourself. Be safe.

If you ever feel unsafe or need help, anyone is welcome to run upto me and ask me for help! I’ll go all mama bear and keep you safe!!!

https://docs.google.com/document/d/166g6Vo8Fb9H3FIZF2H6faEBHtFQSf7nVn_QxcJ9NMi0/edit?usp=sharing

I made this google doc covering 14 different self defense tips and tricks. it was made on January 15th, 2020 so it was before I decided I’d come back to tumblr jhjshdbjfh.

EVERY TIME I SEE THIS I REBLOG BECAUSE THIS IS SUPER IMPORTANT!!!!!

i fucking hate this world. anyways R E B L O G

Just saw a video explaining why putting a key between each finger is more likely to hurt you than them (the keys will just get pushed back into your knuckles). A better way to hold them is to get your longest key and just clench your hand around it, like you’re making a fist. That’ll give you a lot more force and means you can use them in more scenarios (if someone grabs you from behind, you can use the key this way)

Not only for girls and women but also for boys and men.

i feel obligated to reblog this.

I hate that we need these things, but this is so so so important, it can literally save someone’s life

How to tell if your drink has been spiked:

1. The colour of it has changed

2. It’s become cloudy-looking

3. There more bubbles in it than should be

4. The ice in it sinks

If you are being followed, go to somewhere with high security like a jewellery store or a bar, if you can, and say what’s happening (the jewellery store and bar are best shots because they’re the most likely ones to believe you, the bar for obvious reasons and the jewellery store because there’s not likely to be a huge presence of toxic masculinity so you’ll be believed)

I hate it so much that i have to reblog this and that we still need this, but it’s so important!! Please everyone (yes also boys/men/enbys/genderfluids/everyone) stay safe out there!!

but I was never taught these things.

The first time I was groped, I was 10 years old. Do you feel sick yet? 10 years. What kind of fucker gropes a 10 y/o?

All I have learnt is to use my elbow or knee or fist or just duck and avoid contact. This post helped a lot, thanks.

It was the english teacher at my old school tho I did broke his nose and stabbed his stomach with a pen so

Also carry pointie / sharp or that which has a edge, it helps a lot, yk, just stab

-if you’re walking alone w/ headphones in, either have one earbud out at all times or have the music/podcast/audiobook/whatever you’re listening to on low and always listen for footsteps or other noises coming from behind you

-If there is a strange looking man in front of your building who doesn’t live there, walk around the block until he leaves so he can’t figure out that you live there and so he can’t kidnap you

-if a man is groping you against your will, go for the balls. always go for the balls. It’ll 1) hurt like hell, and 2) shock him to the point where you can probably run away and get help.

- carry pepper spray or some other type of weapon

As this site is full of readers,

1: if you’re reading a book with a large number of pages, you know, those BIG ONES, or with the hard cover, don’t leave it at home and never bring outside. I’m not saying to bring it everywhere, but if you are going to any possible dangerous places alone, bring them, in a purse or even by hand (to show it to everyone). Believe me, if you hit someone with it, it will hurt them!!

2: hairspray works just like pepper spray

3: if your being attacked, and you don’t have any pointed objects, neither training, put your fingers on the predators eyes and press it. With all your strength, it will leave them blind or disabled. Use it only if your life is in risk!

4:

5: the iPhones have a great setting that if you press it will call police, send them photos of your back and front cameras and send a message to the contacts you select saying your in danger; press 5times the “turn off” button and it will appear -sometimes you have to activate it before-

6:

I’m so happy to share these tips.

Don’t ignore pls it might save your of someone else’s life

truthfully, it’s a shame that this is a problem in the first place.

thank you to everyone who gave tips, and please reblog! it may help someone in the long run, and maybe even save their life.

DO NOT SCROLL PAST

Really? I was taught to find someone i know quickly. you never know if that woman has a child she kidnapped and she’s taking you to

what kind of oomfie am i?

you can tell me anonymously if you'd like!

Alright fuckers which one

Chicago

Detroit

New York

Reblog to assess who is a friend and who is an enemy

There is no secret fourth. If you like all of them, pick one. If you like none of them, pick one. If you dont know what pizza is look at the pictures. No none of the above. Fight. Kill

It’s so fucked up how tiktok culture has made clout-poisoned people turn the public into content, every day I see people minding their business have their entire faces put online for thousands of likes, a couple kissing on the train, a lady dancing across a cross walk, a guy nodding his head to the music at a club, a lady buying a banana at the store, ring camera footage of the neighbors kids being stupid. Just let people live jfc

I think I may have made it seem like this is about wholesome content (which my sentiment towards that is the same) but most of the time when I see this stuff people are being ridiculed for being completely normal. And I didn’t make up any of these examples btw, I couldn’t find the dance one but only because there are too many videos of people being recorded at cross walks

(Faces censored and additional text added by me)

Im gonna add this to every post about this i see im never gonna shut up about it. This will get people killed. This will ruin lives. More people live in hiding than you think. So many people are one post away from having to abandon their whole lives. Dont ever post anything of anyone without their consent, stranger or not.

I am a photographer. It is my job to go into schools and take candid photos for the yearbook.

The number of kids that are on a 'do not photograph' list isn't large, but it is a non-zero number. If that kid is even out of focus in the background, we do not use that photo.

If a child shows even the tiniest bit upset that there's a person in the room with a camera, I do not take their photo.

At pop culture conventions, I ask people if I can take their photo. Or if I take a candid of them, I track them down and give them my info and get th3ir consent before posting.

At events like parties, concerts, performances, consent is generally implied because these are photographed events, but if an attendee approaches me and tells me to crop them out then I crop them out.

This makes street photography tedious, but I learned in my very first job as a camp counselor that people have very good reasons for not wanting their photo publicized. There are kids in the foster system with abusive parents. There are adults with stalkers. There are people who might be a witness to a crime.

Even outside of this- I've seen how private persons become memes against their will just by going out in public. Some people are super not normal about meme fame.

Leave people alone. The world is complicated. Make your own content.

It's a unique type of frustration when you agree that a character is deeply flawed but other people keep missing what's actually wrong with them and assigning them new flaws that they don't even have it's like free my man he did none of that. He did a bunch of other shit tho.

you just got press crow'd. reblog to instantly press crow your friends

Hey, could you do me a favor?

Could you just RB this?

The little RB statistics chart is so pleasant and stimmy to look at and I want to see what it looks like when it gets really REALLY huge because it makes me think of some deep sea lifeform

here lemme help

*ahem*

reblog this post to kiss the person you reblogged it from

hope that works :)

THANK YOU THIS IS MAKING MY BRAIN SO HAPPY AAAAAAAAA

THIS IS SO SATISFYING ITS LIKE A GROUP OF PLANKTON OR A RAILWAY CHART...

IM SCREAMIKNDFISDNFJSDBF

I don't know what energy this is giving off, but it's giving

Out of Touch

OP is still active with people reblogging a 1m notes post once a week

They are the true hero

motherfucker said PROFESSIONAL

Here on tumblr we are all professionals.

I have something extremely important to say

My aunt’s dog has a paw print on his paw

The small little gasp I let out is heard universally when you view this picture

I would eat the rats. I’m too nice. I would never call them out for a mistake. I would eat the damn rats.

What about the person who missed out on the rats they ordered though?

Reblog if you missed out on the rats you ordered

Boss is asleep, cannot stop me from frogposting