“that guy just cut me in line you should turn him into a metaphor for time”
You know what physically hurts me the most? When Bedelia asks about Hannibal's past and he says "Nothing happened to me. I happened." And i just wanna bawl my eyes out cause this is exactly what he needs: to bawl his eyes out. But he had repressed everything so much that he can't even see himself as a victim. Nothing happened to me- my dude your parents were killed in front of you when you were 8 and then you were fed your own sister, im pretty sure something happened to you.
And by saying I happened he puts the emphasis on himself. He has learnt to cope with his trauma by telling himself "I was born wrong anyway so i would have ended up like this no matter how my childhood would have turned out. I happened. My whole family dying and eating my sister are not the reason im a monster. I am the sole reason for that"
And this hurts me so much that i could throw up cause he deserves so much more. And this is why i love the idea of him finally opening up about it to Will who is asking the right questions (unlike Bedelia who asked how did his sister taste like), Will is the first one to make him realize that what had happened has a huge weight and it finally starts to sink in for Hannibal. And the clarity he gets from his discussions with Will is overwhelming cause everything comes back to surface all at once: nightmares, flashbacks, zoning out.
And Will is keeping an eye on him all the time. He is there for every nightmare, for every flashback Hannibal wants to share. He is also there for all the times when Hannibal wants to sit in silence and rest his head on Will's lap.
brutaliakhoa
when hannibal was first sent to robert lecter, he would speak to no one. much later, he and chiyoh would trade stilted words in japanese, clipped phrases both from hannibal’s unfamiliarity with the language and unwillingness to speak more than he had to. their last argument, the one that cemented chiyoh to her fate, was in japanese.
decades later, when they finally saw each other again, when hannibal knew chiyoh had spoken to no one except perhaps occasionally to the prisoner in the same amount of time, he used english with her. he would deny her even the briefest acknowledgement of their history together, deny her the smallest bit of familiarity when the world has moved on without her. when she has been in stasis for so long and forcibly shoved into motion—fault of hannibal’s, too, though this time indirectly.
what did hannibal even do with will's jacket after mizumono? He took off with it but did he leave it some other place, bedelia's maybe? Or did he take it with him, would he hide it beneath other stuff in his bags, would he bury it and never look at it or mention it – or would he put it on display, would he wear it occasionally, would he touch it and leave it out in the open at the apartments they were staying at during their time in europe? Would he resent that he took it in the first place or would he be glad to have an excuse to think about will?
post fall hannibal and will biting off and chewing and swallowing each other's ring fingers raw I'll say it one thousand times
There is a very clear difference to how Hannibal commits violence against Will compared to others. Sometimes there is the air of him doing it for pleasure, but often it’s out of necessity, self-preservation. He killed Tobias and Antony to keep his secret, he fought Jack in “Mizumono” to stay alive. While it was “I need to do this”, part of it was “because I want to”, versus with Will it was “I have to”. He didn’t necessarily want to harm Will like he did the others, but he had to protect himself, whether physically from prison or emotionally from betrayal. But there is a hesitancy with violence towards Will because he cares about him. He knows he has to inflict pain, but he wants, needs, that pain to be survivable, tolerable, forgivable. There is a deep-rooted fear that Will may not forgive him. What if this act is the final straw and there is no going back.? Still, it’s a need that cannot be ignored, it has to be done. With tears in his eyes, it must be done. And the only thing he can give amongst all the inevitable suffering is a bit of kindness, a small touch of love. A little token of “please just trust me. Trust that I don’t want to do this, but I have to, and I would do anything else if I could.” Hannibal wants the best for Will and is burdened with dealing him the worst. A violence he knows too intimately, and he has no choice but to extend it to someone he loves. An ache deep in his core spread through a trembling, hesitant touch. One last good brush of skin before the spill of blood. A tuck of hair behind the ear and a plead from his soul that this won’t be the time he loses Will forever.
So when Will forgives him in the catacombs, it’s a relief that yes, he was forgiven, he didn’t lose him. But a bitter ache crawled up from his mending heart knowing he had to eat him, and it’d be final. There would be no Will Graham left to forgive him. The least he could do is extend that love once more. Tend to his wounds, hold him, pet his hair, feed him, make it so Will doesn’t feel too much pain. And when it all falls to pieces, he is left in limbo awaiting Will’s forgiveness, hoping against all odds that he could turn back time and go back to a place where they were okay again. But it was the final straw. Will didn’t want him. Will wouldn’t miss him like he’d miss Will. Years and distance separate them, but it could never fully rip them apart. Because at the end of it all Will forgave him. Wanted him. Chose him. Loved him. Despite all the violence and bloodshed and tears, it was all worth it if it meant ending up in each other’s arms. To be the last thing the others feels with no more time left to worry about forgiveness because he will have it for eternity.
to have and to hold, to fuck nasty, till murder-suicide do us part
hannibal is SO funny it’s two men who are so horny for each other they can barely breathe saying things like “i want to see the majesty of your becoming” as if they have magic powers but they’re literally just stabbing people…… anyone could do that kings
Anyways, when they start sleeping together (i mean sleeping as the act of actually sleeping), Will is not comfortable with too much physical contact. He would stay on his side of the bed and turn his back to Hannibal.
It takes a lot of time for him to let Hannibal be touchy, not because he doesn't want him to, he does, but he feels like he wouldn't be able to offer the same in return?
And Hannibal is patient and soft and knows that Will feels bad for acting "cold" but he never really puts pressure on him.
And one night Hannibal feels Will's arm rest on his middle followed by "please don't react in any way" and the poor man complies but soon his arm finds Will's and he doesn't complain.
Moving fast forward he ends up sleeping like a koala attached to an eucalyptus tree when he cuddles Hannibal. God forbid that Hannibal wants to go to the bathroom cause the answer he gets is "it's a shame, Hannibal, for someone with a phd you should have thought about that before cuddling me"
Of course there are also the cases when they have little fights and Hannibal wants to give Will enough space but Will would be like "what are you doing????? Cuddle me for fuck's sake"
thinking "haha what if i jokingly shipped them" is your last chance to get out btw
randalltier-deactivated20230711
God. What is it about Mads Mikkelsen as Hannibal that's like. He's cold and calculating. He's warm and approachable. He's unreadable and chilling. He's gentle and loving. He's confident and haughty. He's terrifying and monstrous. He is all of this in the span of a minute he's none of it he's everything in between he's the opposite of it all.
Tbh, at first I thought that Hannibal had charmed me so much, because — being used to the fact that “good” characters in media stay that way till the very end — I wasn’t expecting the ending of the series at all. And, yeah, I still believe that’s part of why I enjoy this show so much, but man, lately I’ve realized that maybe I love the progression of Will’s feelings for Hannibal even more than the surprising ending.
Like— when Will meets Hannibal, he immediately realizes that Hannibal is there to create a psychological profile of him and isn’t happy about it. Jack realizes he has to change a tactic and simply engages Hannibal and Will in the Minnesota Shrike case so that Hannibal can work on Will’s psyche. While having a breakfast together, Hannibal tells Will, “God forbid we become friendly.”. and Will bluntly replies that he doesn’t find him that interesting.
In the second season, after Will realizes that Hannibal is a murderer and has framed him for his crimes, he feels betrayed by him and wants to kill Hannibal. He doesn’t hide it from Hannibal, but he also says he doesn’t want to kill him anymore because he finally finds him interesting. Killing Hannibal became simply his fantasy (in the near future I will write a post about the scene in the pig pen from the end of Tome-wan). Hugh Dancy himself said that Will could have killed Hannibal, but he didn’t because the truth to be told — Will doesn’t hate Hannibal.
And a few things happen in the second season quickly one by one:
1. Will tells Peter that he envys him his hate, because it is much easier when you know how to feel.
2. Will dreams that Hannibal says to him, “No one can be fully aware of another human being unless we love them. By that love we see potential in our beloved. Through that love we allow our beloved to see their potential. Expressing that love, our beloved’s potential comes true.”. And yet in the same dream, he kills Hannibal, but the blood spatter resembles ejaculation.
3. An episode later he has sex with a woman, but comes, imagining two things: 1) Stagman, who is his mental image of Hannibal; 2) that he is with Hannibal and Alana in Hannibal’s bedroom.
4. The scene of eating ortolans, which should symbolize blowjob.
Given the fact that at first Bryan Fuller stated that Will is heterosexual, the season 2b is beautiful representation of a man who for over 30 years thought of himself as heterosexual and is slowly finding out that he may be attached to men too.
teacupmotif
as much as i am a hannibal calling will “mylimas” (beloved) enjoyer, truly i don’t think he could stomach the words, allow the word to hang in the air, to be heard. hannibal has kept his home inside of him for so long that the door to the vault has been ironed shut. your mother tongue is a knife that eviscerates you, near cleaves you in half, and leaves you gasping out. the last person he spoke lithuanian to was mischa, and to ever use that tongue again seemed like sacrilege, seemed like he was spewing out a part of her that he should keep within himself. it seemed like he was losing her all over again.
“engaging in media” like everyone should. by relating it back to nbc hannibal. quite frankly the first tv show ever created by man