Venom: You expect me to risk my life for pizza?
Eddie: WITH!! Pepperoni
Venom: Son of a bitch. I’m in
this is canon you cant tell me otherwise.
damn. eddie brock really puts the bi in symbiosis. what a world.
if venom isn’t in no way home then WHAT WAS EVEN THE POINT
Stiles: If you could guess, how many brain cells do you have?
Liam: Dorito’s cool ranch.
Stiles:
Stiles: I'm just gonna assume zero for now.
Liam: I love that song.
Isaac: If I had a face like yours, I'd put it on a wall and throw a brick at it.
Stiles: If I had a face like YOURS, I'd put it on a brick and throw a wall at it.
Using the Stucky scenes for Steggy scenes in what if has major "Let's reuse all the stiles and Derek scenes for Derek and jennifer" in Teen wolf
This is my thirteenth reason, my villain origin story whatever you wanna call it.
From a psychology hacks post:
"look at someone's lips to show them you're interested"
I mean... intense eye contact works too.
Or my personal favourite:
"this guy hot imma make him my biiitchhh"
Dylan O'Brien forever people's bitch.
Anonymous asked:
hold on a fucking second. delaware is a state?? i thought it was a river? or is the river more important than the state? why don't i know this? (i should mention i don't like in america, i'm just confused)
there is delaware (state) and delaware (river)
both are equally strange
the state is a tiny little cryptid thing
the rive is a monster that spans new york, pennsylvania, new jersey and delaware. also washington crossed it once and that was like kinda a big deal i guess. like crossing the rubicon in rome.
the state tries to me more important with its “im the first state!!!” bs (seriously its even on the fucking license plates) but we all know. its the river.
THATS TUPPERWARE
i thought delaware was a place in ohio? why are there so many things named delaware?
delaware is too powerful
what the fuck
Wait what? I thought Delaware was a store with building supplies. Like paint, wood, nails and stuff?
THATS HOME DEPOT ???
I know home depot, but dude I don't know anything about America mad have never been there. Are you sure there is not a some sort of store called something close to Delaware!?!
.....ace hardware....?
this post has only been around for a few hours but could very well be a world heritage post
but at what cost
This post launched at 8am PST on 12 Feb 2021. The above conversation has happened in 3 hours.
he WHAT? i thought he was from. w. wait. ???
delaware stole the presidents shoelaces for clout and became too powerful
From the UK- and what do you mean Delaware isn't a type of ceramic?
it is now
@hellsite-hall-of-fame is it too early?
Isn’t delaware what they make computers on???
software ??
I think they meant Dell Ware, a specific computer type. We had a Dell computer once.
I thought Delaware was that famous singer they spoofed in Zootopia.
gazelle??
oh i thought delaware was that one british singer lady, you know, the one from chasing pavements
that's fucking adele
isn’t delaware that place you go when you die
youre thinking of superhell and all of you are going there
how the fuck did any of you come to the conclusions you all made
we live in america?
I thought Delaware was that food delivery service that keeps interrupting youtube videos with their ads when I'm trying to have a good time
..... are you talking about Doordash???
Isn't Delawere the name of that one girl in the song that goes "Hey there, Delawere"? She's from NYC or something.
THATS HEY THERE DELILAH
Pausing here to point out that op is “dear-AO3″ and now I’m wondering if Delaware fanfic would be categorized as RSF (real state fic) or AU (alternate unitedstates)
stop i do not want to think about this
Isn’t Delaware that SPN ship that exploded the internet
Everyone on this post:
I love that the “no, that’s [x]” meme is making a comeback here and only here and nobody has any idea what’s going on
Keep up the good work, we can make poor OP have a melt down yet.
Isn't delaware that one brand of pizza that's like "it's not delivery, it's delaware."
isn't delaware the god of the sea
Isn't Delaware the name of that guy who painted the Mona Lisa?
delaware is that one evil cyborg guy that has a son named Luke and a red laser sword
Thats Darth Vader. Im pretty sure Delaware is that other red-laser sword guy. You know. The one that stabbed Qui-Gon.
what have i created
I usually only reblog older posts, but this definitely deserves to be in every tumblr hall of fame
this post has only existed for 8 days.
happy one month birthday
This is just the “no odd number have the letter e”post
it’s ALL odd numbers have “e” silly!
(odd numbers end in the digits 1, 3, 5, 7, 9 (one, three, five, seven, nine) and the only ones for which the word version doesn’t end in those words are/end in eleven, thirteen, fifteen, seventeen, nineteen. I will NOT elaborate or defend this lest this post become another. ur free to do this yourselves if you want tho)
i mean no even numbers end with 1, 3, 5, 7, or 9
oh no please dont make another number discourse im still reeling from the last one
What about infinity, if it's infinite the technically at one point as it goes on forever it does end in in either 1,3,5,7, or 9 but because it's infinite it's neither even nor odd. Yes? No? Idk I'm drunk
this was posted exactly one month ago to the minute. 87k notes.
@dear-ao3 do you need a hug
yes
What a chaotic energy and turn of events.
Almost woke my sister up when reading this, laughed way too hard
here, for all you fuckers asking, this is the damn delaware post
sam: when all this is over we’ll go our separate ways and never see each other again 😡😡😡
bucky: yeah 😡😡😡
3 episodes later:
*has sleepover and builds a literal boat together*
Me trying to write my 500 word essay:
Fanfic writers pumping out 100k+ word stories:
How to impress your crush a guide by Bucky Barnes
1. Pay them a surprise visit and show them how strong you are
2. Bring them a gift
3. Show them that you can be handy
4. Help them with something that is important to them, without expecting anything in return
5. After you help them, say that you are leaving and that you plan to spend the night in a hotel
6. They will ask you to stay
7. Your reward is a smile and a flirty joke
8. Genuine laughter from you,because they are hilarious
9. One night on their sofa is one step closer to their heart
10. Working as a team helps them see that you are someone that they can rely on during tough times
11. Exercising together is a good idea, you stay healthy and at the same time you can admire their beautiful physique
12. You did it, they are already completely crazy about you and they will not want to let you go
13. Mission accomplished, they are more than impressed with you, they are already as in love with you as you are with them.
mxrvel-peter-parker
chokesngags
FRAME WORTHY
That spider man poster is TOUGH!
That Bisexual Guardians Poster tho
Hey i don't know if this is the right place to ask, but... I'm looking for some serie or long Sterek fics about either MPREG or baby acquisition, because all that i find are like super short i really want to read a serie about them and baby's!! thank you so much!! ♥
AND
Anonymous said:
hii do u have any recs where stiles or derek find a baby on their porchand raise it or something like that? <3
Yeah! And we have a tag.
(1/1 I 4,148 I General)
Parrish is holding the infant like a fullback carrying the football, tight and close to his body, as if he’s afraid someone’s going to strip it away from him at any moment.
“Sir,” he whispers, “this baby is running hot.”
“So call the paramedics, get Sally on the line. For heaven’s sake, Parrish, this baby needs a hospital, not the sheriff” The baby is hot to the touch but his pale eyes, when they blink open, are clear and he’s not flushed like a feverish infant would be.
“No,” Parrish hisses, “I mean this baby is running hot. I don’t think he’s human.”
John looks at the priest, still standing in the aisle, hunched in concern. He looks at the baby in his duck onesie and little yellow hat.
“Oh, fuck,” he says.
(1/1 I 7,630 I Not Rated)
“You’re what?” Stiles yells.
Derek jerks the phone away from his ear and waits a few beats before putting it back. “I’m adopting the baby I found on the subway last month,” he repeats.
(1/1 I 7,737 I Teen)
"That's a kid," Stiles said.
Derek growled. "It's a selkie."
"It's a selkie kid," Stiles pointed out, because really, they did not need to be arguing semantics right now. "Do selkies just go around leaving their kids sleeping in caves on the beach?"
(1/1 I 9,239 I Explicit)
“What’s going on?” Derek asked.
Scott shook his head, “You need to see.”
“Would you stop with the fucking mystery and just tell us already?” Stiles snapped at him.
“We found a baby,” Scott relented, starting to half jog towards the opposite line of trees they had been standing in front of.
Stiles looked at Derek and found him frowning deeply. He reached for his hand and squeezed, Derek looked at him and gave him a small smile, lacing his fingers with Stiles’.
Scott took them to the big tree in the middle of the forest that had a hollow bark, except this time when they looked inside, it wasn’t really hollow. A little girl, maybe four or five years old, was sitting in there all curled up in herself, her arms hugging her knees tightly.
(1/1 I 13,295 I Teen)
They find the baby under a butterfly bush, a sweet smelling buddleja with purple flowers and narrow, green leaves. The baby is dirty, wet and hungry, wrapped in a fur blanket, and this close its squalling is loud enough to wake the dead.
-- Or the one where Stiles' mom was a harpy and passed certain genes along.
(3/3 I 15,296 I Explicit)
“You put the diaper on backwards,” Derek says.
(5/5 I 16,950 I Explicit)
Derek has to deal with a newly bitten Stiles.
(1/1 I 16,921 I Teen)
The baby's wailing is piercing, Stiles doesn't know how Derek can stand it. He tries shushing her and cooing at her and bouncing her a little, but the crying only gets louder, and in addition to hurting his ears, it's hurting his soul.
“Stiles,” Derek interrupts him mid-croon, eyebrows meeting over the bridge of his nose, “have you fed her since you found her?”
Stiles gapes and looks down at the baby's distressed face as she bawls.
(1/1 I 43,656 I Mature)
When death, in the form of hunters, comes for a family of Kelpies seeking refuge in the Preserve - in Hale territory - the Hale Pack is too late to save them. Before he dies, the male Kelpie presses a precious bundle into Stiles’ arms and begs the Emissary to take responsibility for it, which an initially reluctant Stiles does. When he agreed, Stiles had no idea what the sight of him with a baby would do to his esteemed Alpha, Derek. If he’d known, he might not have been so reluctant to agree.
(16/? I 51,471 I Mature)
Stiles is just trying to live a simple life. Have a job, pay his rent, and survive enough to eat his next meal. But then he's fired from his job, watches a mother abandon her baby, tries to stop her and picks the baby up, and now everyone thinks the baby is his. Even his very handsome and moody boss, Derek Hale, who forces the responsibility onto him at the cost of keeping his job or else.
(15/15 I 51,937 I Mature)
Stiles finds a baby on the porch.
It looks exactly like him.
Well, this is awkward.
so you know how it was supposed to be derek, not peter, who stiles found when he was taken by the wild hunt. did anyone ever write that fic?
we need this
Could anyone help me find a Sterek fic where Stiles, while in the Ice-bath (from Chaos Rising, I think?), starts seeing alternative universes where he and Derek prove to be soul mates? And he keeps going back to see more and more versions of themselves together until finally he realizes his own feelings?
I read it ages ago and now I don’t know how to find it.
Who do I even ship him with? This is so unfair I need help!!!
Bonus: Chris Evans is me.
