My left arm hurts and it smells like toast
If Satan is such a big problem why don’t we just put him through a wood chipper
Yeah sure I may be a raging lunatic with a tendency to blow up gas stations and chase random women I see at night while on all fours
laughter will always be stored in these walls
Omfg this is amazing like I’m literally melting 🥹🥹 :)))
I walk up to my teacher, “Can I go to the restroom?” I ask, blissfully naive. She looks at me, a dark smile growing on her face, “I don’t know… CAN you?” she laughs, never breaking the cold stare she traps me in. I drop my head and chuckle, the small laugh becoming maniacal, “Yes, yes I can. Because I am asking for PERMISSION, NOT ABILITY!” I shout, nearly doubling over in the crazed laughing fit. Her eyes widen in horror, “It- it can’t be! NOOOOO!” She cries, beginning to melt.
Man, sometime I fuck up a word so badly even grammarly is like “bro, wtaf is this shit” and I’m like, yeah that’s fair
When you stim so hard you fucking knock something over
Fuck you and your first drafts. I’m not a pussy, there will be no first drafts over here.
I’m basically normal if you really don’t think about
You tell your medical advisor ONCE you think people can read your thoughts and they try to put you on antipsychotics. Bitches be crazy frfr.
The court tried to tell that “bitches be crazy” wasn’t a valid excuse for 1st degree homicide. Man, bitches be crazy.
All of my red flags are canceled out due to the fact that I am a little bit silly
*in autotune* Why do like, 25 of my bones require upkeep? All my mouth stones are pretty high maintenance.
LOOK AT HIM HES SO PRECIOUS AND HAPPY BECAUSE OF PUMPKIN OH MY FUCKING GOD