#i'm losing my SHIT#would you like to not see a dog?#it's brown Thank you, @dreamwaffles, that's it EXACTLY 😂
Even in slow mo it's a blur
is anyone else on this hill or is it just me and sisyphus and kate bush?
i watch this and think "oh how prett-OH WOW" every single time
i wanna adopt them as my grandmas
an incomplete collection of tweets i consider to be short poems
i have some too
she was ethically opposed to the practice of assimilation into the hive mind but her dick was a fork and by g-d that goo girl pussy was starting to look like a toaster
why do you all hate our flash fiction
vampire-red-deactivated20210228
Wheres that “before pride month ends does anyone want to admit they have a crush on me” post, like I know it’s only the 11th but I cant stop thinking abt it
madampigeon
ok so I know exactly what you’re talking about but I can only find the one with bowser :/
vampire-red
Honestly I think the bowser version is better than the original
Yeah my name is Tim, short for OpTIMus Prime
[id: tags saying "wait wait i wanna know where they plan on using their full name, why'd you cut it off"]
answer: THEIR WEDDING.
I can't describe to you the emotion I would feel if I was hanging out with my friend Tim and he was like "hey we've been friends for a while now I want to show you something," and he hands me his driver's license, upon which I read "Optimus Prime Jones"
🎉IT'S A TIE!!! 🎉
congrats to jessie and james, the co-winners of the pokemon human character tournament!!!
YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!
posting this on twitter will get you put into witness protection
The magic of childhood is that you were constantly encountering new things. The best way to feel that way again is to fill your life with new experiences.
I like big butts and yet I possess the capability to lie
-one of the two guards
