Ur age in bio

"and the crowd goes mild" is my favorite comment on videos of bad performances

God damn I’ve been Owned…

where’s jack going

to undo the future that is aku

kneeling down beside my bed and folding my hands and closing my eyes: dear god please let me have some gay sex soon and also maybe let me win the lottery so i never have to get a job again. okay goodbye i mean amen

literally nothing funnier than a newly born aquatic mammal realizing they've been cursed to live in water

Wait I have another one sorry

me when im giving birth to my twins

me when I'm giving birth to my triplets

look at this video of a mouse eating soup and bread and butter

peace and FUCKING love on planet earth

like all lapsed catholics i don’t actually believe in hell unless it’s for comedic purposes

that’s right

Hello everyone. In the years since 2017 when I made this post, I have since learned a little bit more about audio mixing. Please once again enjoy my Left 4 Dead OC, the Gunter, who is a Hunter but he has a gun

bro got that gender reveal pussy. set you ablaze.

I don't know who blazed this but staff said absolutely not

Sincerel

current note count: 124

i'm going to air fry you don't put that evil on me

You little shits

Hey, you’re the one who wanted to blaze this shit up! You meet your destiny on the path you take to avoid it, palchum!

WRONG someone ELSE blazed it i did nothing!!

the fact that these are minutes apart is KILLING me

this is the funniest possible tag on this post

lol

for anyone who hasn’t seen or played the game...it does, in fact, take place in an ocean made up of human blood.

ok guys im gonna go to sleep early tonight so i can finally get good rest gnight :)

ⓘ Fact check: This user intends to go to their room and take apart their old Yamaha EZ-200 keyboard in their underwear.

Ok yeah i just have to fix it the middle D, D#, Db keys don't work. that's all. Just a quick repair.

ⓘ Fact check: Though the act was partially motivated by desire to repair, this user views it as having more of a sexual connotation.

ok honestly fuck you for real

ⓘ Fact check: lmaoooooo suck itttttt. you wanna fuck the yamaha ez-200. you wanna fuck the keyboarrddddd

Cowboys Against Misgendering (CAM)

i love that motorcycles exist. like i'm genuinely so glad that someone was like "what if bikes were as fast as cars and could turn you into roadkill if you hit a pothole"

what if there was a vehicle so dangerous you had to wear armor to drive it

This is terrible but today when I was playing volleyball outside with some friends one of their children (18 months) was sort of ambling around on his stumpy little toddler legs and so we were all trying to be careful and like not spike the ball onto the baby but then he wandered over to his father, who picked him up bc dad reflexes, and then the ball got passed over to the dad and he sort of had a no thoughts moment and instinctively used his child to smack the volleyball over to the next person. Like he just swung the kid and used his legs like a baseball bat. I'm never going to forget his face of premature regret mid baby-manuever right when he realized what he was doing AND the instant he realized his wife saw it happen. Anyway the baby was fine he didn't make contact with the ball all that hard and he was just mad his dad wouldn't use him as a club again but I had to sit down because I laughed so hard I cried.