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what will surely be the downfall of evolutionism (part one)

if i ever piss you off tell me

i want to be given the chance to make things right

don’t bottle it up because you feel like it’s easier

if it can be avoided just tell me

communication means a lot to me ok and i like everything to be out in the open

THIS IS IMPORTANT PAY ATTENTION I have said these exact words Perfectly put.

And then 5 mins later she dies and so do I

Super Silky Summer Legs

Next time you are feeling down, about to binge, going on a date, or just need to pamper yourself, do this. I just did it and I can not stop rubbing my legs together. It feels like I paid for that over expensive pedicure at the salon.

Ingredients

Now this isn’t just geared to ladies…. guys, if you want to get lucky, I suggest you offer to rub your ladies’ feet with this mix too. It feels awesome, and when you get lucky, you will be thanking me that her rough grandma feet aren’t cutting your legs, if ya know what I’m saying… hahaha.

I have silky arm pits too!!

Try it, I swear, You will want everyone to touch your legs.

i just did this and after about 2 or so months of not shaving this is the most incredible thing i have ever done its like my legs arent even legs they’re some sort of ancient fabric made only for powerful pharoahs

i highly suggest this even if you don’t shave use it on your feet or shave your pits or your pubes with it because you will feel like a fucking deity

HOLY SHIT I JUST USED THIS AND???? I FEEL LIKE MY LEGS ARE MADE OF ANGEL WINGS

THIS IS THE BEST THING IF YOU DON’T USE IT YOU’RE CRAZY

I just tried this and it feels so good I want to cry

I’VE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS POST FOR LIKE 6 MONTHS THANK YOU TUMBLR

THIS FUCKING RECIPE IS A WONDERFUL THING. USE IT WHEREVER YOU SHAVE. 

FACE? LEGS? IDK JUST SMUSH IT AGAINST YOUR SKIN AND REJOICE

REBLOGGING THIS AGAIN BECAUSE I USE IT A LOT AND IT’S THE BEST AND JUST DO THIS THING

reblogging again cause I love this stuff

I’ve got arachnophobia

why are people so obsessed with “top or bottom” 

honestly im just excited to have a bunk bed

uhm im pretty sure OP was talking about sex lol. what are you 12 or something?

what the fuck is sex

I guarantee you, the woman has packed all her stuff, plus her kids’ stuff, plus all the shit her husband forgot to pack. Five minutes into their vacation, dude will be cursing because he forgot something important, and his wife will be like, “Here it is. I thought you’d need it, so I packed it, along with all of your underwear, socks, swimsuit, toothbrush, and deodorant because apparently you confused our family trip to Disney World with an overnight couple’s stay at a nudist colony. You’re welcome.”

Laugh it up, assholes. Without us, you’d be wearing the same underwear three days straight, including poolside.

Fucking right

Flaphack #7: *Magically transform an old concert lanyard into a soothing pancake scented car freshener! 

*not actually magic

DENNY’S WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU EVEN DOING

denny’s has the best social media marketing team ever look at this look at it they knew their restaurant was the equivalent of 3am nightblogging and they just went with it

Don’t refuse to reblog this.

be safe and make sure to do it at night with lots of cover so no one can ID you

im confused what is there

are

arepeople literally putting spikes down so people cant sleep in the only place they are given

seriously

Yeah I’ve been seeing about this spike thing. Where do they expect homeless people to go if not live outdoor?? They are homeless. It’s fine if you can’t help but don’t make other people lives harder.

OK I AM REALLY PASSIONATE ABOUT THIS SHIT

so places like this are spending lots and lots of money on putting down barbaric devices to keep people from fucking sleeping anywhere,

instead of putting that money into organizations to FUCKING FIND THEM HOMES

get them off the streets with love, not hate.

do it

so i was walking to class when i noticed a huge jam in the busiest hallway of the school and a bunch of people screaming rooting aggressively for these two seniors so the teachers and vice principal rush in to break up the fist fight to find out its a fUCKING BEYBLADE BATTLE

This is fire.

im about this

If you were my homework I’d do you.

We love eachother i swear

*puts on lifejacket* i am ready for intercourse

*AGGRESSIVELY FORWARDS TO EVERY GUY I KNOW*

*TIME TRAVELS AND AGGRESSIVELY FORWARDS TO PAST SELF*

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU

ALWAYS REBLOG!

this elevator does not go up or down it goes isosceles triangle and left

who the hell let willy wonka design another elevator

So there’s a Japanese slang term, ‘chuunibyou’, that roughly translates to “Middle School 2nd Year Syndrome.” It is used to describe the stupid phases people go through when they are 14, like pretend to be really hardcore, act like they know everything, say they have mystical powers, etc.

I’m so happy this term exists.

#in english we call it ‘what are you like 12’ and i think that’s beautiful

how does phone sex end?