baby what's wrong, you've barely touched your 18 pounds of cokane 12 pounds of crake and 7 male stripers (diverse)

geez what a dickhead

an absolute fuckface

I couldn’t make sense of this image & so googled to try to find out more.

Instead I found this which seems significantly worse and more cursed for some reason. I actually made this new side blog just to share it so I wouldn’t be mentally scarred alone.

You have been warned.

talk about thinking with your dick & talking out of your ass

In case anyone doesn’t know, Club Penguin Rewritten was a fan project that started 5 years ago. A team of independent artists and developers successfully revived Club Penguin, and had a community of 11 million up until today. They even rewrote all of the code for HTML5 after flash was taken down, and were always coming out with custom parties, items, and content.

Today, we learned this:

As they investigate, they have been deleting code.

Now, if you go to the website, you see this:

Fuck Disney. Fuck everything they do, and everything they stand for. Fuck your shitty movies, fuck your shitty politics, and fuck the way you destroy everything you touch. Fuck your copyright, too.

I cannot fucking believe how much I'm losing my mind right now over soy sauce history. I'll tell all of you about it after I finish this essay because I need to un-distract myself enough to finish it but what the fuck? What the fuck is going on? I'm losing my fucking mind.

During World War 2 there was a push to industrialize the Japanese soy sauce industry to be better for mass-production. This innovated the chemical fermentation technique and the semichemical fermentation technique utilized by Kikkoman; rather than ferment for four years in gigantic cedar barrels, kioke, instead fermentation takes place for six months or a year in stainless steel barrels which utilize electrolysis to artificially speed up fermentation processes.

During Postwar occupation by Americans, Japan was experiencing massive shortages for the raw materials needed to make soy sauce nationwide, and was forced to rely on exported materials from America to make production. A single American woman named "Ms Appleton" was given total control of apportioning all American soy bean rations to companies, how much, and to who. She had no knowledge of soy sauce, allegedly.

She apparently had so much power over Japanese soy sauce production that she could singlehandedly shape its future by threatening to not give soy beans to any company, family, or factory which did not utilize her specific requirements of semichemical fermentation (reduced from chemical fermentation, since it was that abhorrent). These days, the term soy sauce is distinct from traditional shoyu, and requires distinguishment because of such a radical difference the two products are.

Here's the problem, folks:

I can find absolutely no evidence that Ms Appleton ever existed. There are no sources about this specific period in Japanese history that I'm able to definitively confirm. All of the sources which reference Ms Appleton are referencing in circles with each other; there is no listed source for any of them. Kikkoman's official English website is a veritable goldmine of information regarding this piece of history, with an entire 4 size 13 paragraphs. It not only gives me a first name, Blanche, but also tells me she worked for General Headquarters and that her policies and decisions shaped governmental policies heading into the future.

Except any variation of searching for Ms Appleton, Ms Blanche Appleton, and so on gives me absolutely no information about her ever existing. By appending keywords such as Ms Blanche Appleton+soy sauce, or Ms Blanche Appleton+GHQ, we can find the same couple of sources that are circling each other--or, in the case of the latter, only Kikkoman.

But there is NOTHING else. I'm getting pageantry from some minnesotan town; I'm getting world war 2 veteran records and obituaries when trying to follow that route; I'm getting k-12 teachers and a Titanic survivor named Charlotte. There is no fucking evidence of a Blanche Appleton to substantiate these claims.

And this is fucking massive. Because there should be way more information on her if this was the case; she was apparently powerful and influential enough during the occupation that she could singlehandedly enforce whatever arbitrary rules she wanted on the soy sauce industry and they had to comply or else have no product at all. That level of power is fucking insane. Imagine having so much raw influence over Japan that you could order them to completely renovate and change how they produce and make SOY SAUCE, literally one of if not THE most important thing in Japanese culinary history--and yet there's absolutely zero reference to this outside of like, three specific sites, and none of them have sources, or if they do, they source those sites.

What the fuck is happening here? There shouldn't be radio silence about this woman. There should be records of her policies, there should be legal documents in America which record how she apportioned out American exportation of soy beans to Japan, there should be sources talking about this woman's ability to transform Japan's soy sauce production so heavily that today only 1% of all soy sauce is made with pre-WW2 traditional techniques.

So if she's that big a deal then why does she not exist?

I feel like I'm losing it. I can't think about this too hard because it gives me a headache trying to comprehend any possible answer. There is so many levels to how this shouldn't be happening that I can't settle on just one. I don't understand how some foreigner American could have an iron fist over soy beans so hard that she could apparently influence national policy heading into 2022 but I can only find a first name on the Kikkoman website.

I literally just sent in a Freedom of Information Act request to the national archives asking for any records of a Ms Blanche Appleton, her reports, census information, anything. I can't believe that I'm having to use FOIA to try and ask the government to prove a woman existed because she was that big of a deal in SCAP/GHQ.

This is a translated page of Kikkoman's .co.jp website, with an apparent picture of Ms Appleton.

But this says that she has an apparent good knowledge of soy sauce brewing--directly contradictory to the Kikkoman.com claim that she had "no experience". And it also claims she was in charge of GHQ, which I'm going to assume is a mistranslation, but still.

Major General Murcutt doesn't exist. Douglas MacArthur was appointed head of GHQ/SCAP during the occupation of Japan. This now just has more questions. How did this woman become so important to GHQ that she could directly speak with a Major General? Any level of power or public view she SHOULD have isn't here. You don't just get to be colleagues of a Major Damn General in Post World War 2 Japan. That isn't given to any random housewife.

I just emailed a shoyu brewer family, Yamaroku, about this. The Yamaroku brewery was established 400 years ago; if the company/family were affected during the 1950 import rations and under the thumb of the Supreme Command of the Allied Powers, they'd have records and memory of Blanche Appleton or what it was like during that period as a brewery.

I am at the point where I am genuinely considering the possibility of Blanche Appleton never having existed. There is the chance that Kikkoman invented an 'ambassador'-type person with high influence in the General Headquarters during the occupation to grant itself apparent influence/validity/power above the rest of the competition. "The woman who controls all soy materials coming into Japan visited our main factory and said she liked us :)".

It's incredibly fitting that my first act of serious investigative journalism is about soy sauce. Like, I'm a little annoyed at how on brand this is for me. Of course I'm overly invested in this weird little nitpick about soy sauce. Of course I'm making this the government's problem.

Of course.

It's currently 12:14AM. I have just learned that a private individual submitted a research query to the Japanese National Diet Library in 2008 regarding any information or proof of Blanche Appleton in relation to soy sauce production.

The researchers found absolutely no reference or evidence of her that was not directly related to the Kikkoman company, even after trawling the archives of the Asahi Shimbun Newspaper since 1945.

This information was told to me by a follower of mine--who asked to be anonymous. So right now we have evidence that Japan as an entity cannot find evidence of Blanche Appleton ever existing within relation to soy sauce production. And I can't find evidence of Blanche Appleton existing in obituary records, nor any publicly available birth/deaths.

Right now there seems to be more and more evidence that Miss Blanche Appleton was a complete invention of the Kikkoman Company possibly dating back nearly a hundred years. But why?

If nothing comes back from my Freedom of Information Act request, I'm going to be contacting Kikkoman directly. I'm not going to just let this slide. People have been noticing this since at least 2008. Who is Miss Blanche Appleton? Why would she be faked by Kikkoman? What's the point of this lie, and if it's the truth, if she was real, why can't I find any proof of that?

Who is Blanche Appleton?

Why is everything starting to point towards yakuza/organized crime Kikkoman origin story and why am I researching zaibatsu breakups of the GHQ and where assets from various clans got sent to.

I am going to eat this entire candy cane.

You’re going to get a cavity

good

30 min later, not much progress. 

Its been an hour. I bit my tongue, my teeth hurts and I’m almost halfway done…

One hour and half done. That’s impressive That takes real skill and perseverance

an hour and a half. my grandma called and I didnt take it so i could eat this… i hate everything

i’d rather be eating anything but this

two and a half hours…. my mouth will never taste normal again

3 fucking hours

I’ve tasted Satans asshole and it tastes like 3 hours of mint. 

Please. Please don’t bring this back.

‘Tis the season.

its almost the season again

Hey y’all. Just an update almost 6 years later, one of my teeth broke off and had to be removed this week. The doctors weren’t sure why but I fucking know.

tbblobnoern tuesday

tbblobnoern tuesday

tbblobnoern tuesday

Tbblobnoern Tuesday

you could jerk off to this

I’m reblogging this because it is a nice color PLEASE ignore that last part about jerking off that is not what I wanted to say by reblogging this post tumblr staff could you please remove that rude comment from my post thank you very much?

we should name this color “jerking off green”

How about weedwacking

Sometimes I hyperfocus so hard on something, I forget I’m a person until someone interacts with me. I feel like some wild animal seeing a human being for the first time. I’m like “oh yeah I’m supposed to speak and stuff”

Me: *doing something for hours on end without stopping*

Someone: Hey, are you there? I was just wondering if you’d like to-

Me:

For every single person in the notes going “yeah” or “same” or something like that…

The lettuce won

One for the history books

CROWN THE LETTUCE

It’s still fucking edible!

This is what the lettuce looks like now

theres a hole in the wall in my brothers’ room because they were fighting (for fun not anger) in there once and one of them knocked the other into the wall so hard his head made that hole, so they put two small skeletons in there for decoration

they tapped up the “décor” sign up because according to them the skeleton is named décor and the one underneath him is his husband. also worth noting that they found 2 dollars in there the other day

FVGBH;SXDCFVGNJNFKLEOI45UT6Y

I just love it when Décor the Skeleton finds his way back onto my dash

is the polar opposite to

I am open to constructive criticism

world heritage post

I am closed to constructive criticism.

A new version of Phineas and Ferb is being released. It is on a streaming service, and will be rated MA. Everyone wonders what this mature version of their beloved kids show will be. The first season is released, and you start watching it. It is just the same as the first season of the old show. Is this some elaborate joke? Finally at the end of the first episode, it happens. Dr. Doofenshmirtz is defeated, as he usually is. This time, however, as Perry is making his exit, you here Doofenshmirtz yell, "Fuck you Perry the Platypus." This is the only thing that has changed in the show.

I assumed that Ferb would finally be allowed to kill

What’s on your mind? Learn more about yourself and your unique personality type with this scientist-designed word search.

Conartist, joy, weed. Sounds about right.

oh she knew she was being filmed XD

So, there's apparently research coming out now about microplastics being found in people's bloodstreams and the possible negative effects of that and I feel the need to get out ahead of the wave of corporate sponsored "be sure to recycle your bottles!" or "ban glitter!" campaigns and remind everyone: It's fishing nets. It's fishing nets. It is overwhelming fishing nets It always has been fishing nets. Unless regulations are changed, it will continue to be fishing nets. The plastic in the ocean in largely discarded nets from industrial fishing. The microplastics are the result of these nets breaking down. The "trash islands" are also, you guessed it. Mostly fishing nets and other discarded fishing industry equipment. Do not allow them to continue to twist the story. Do not come after disabled people who require single use plastics. Do not come after people using glitter in art projects and makeup. These things make up a negligible amount of the issue compared to corporate waste, specifically in the fishing industry. Do not let them shift the blame to the individual so they can continue to destroy the planet and our bodies without regulation.

Industries are incredibly resistant to taking responsibility for their own waste, to the point where “consumers are responsible for industrial waste” is somehow considered a sensible, ethical, worthy sentence.

It is actually perfectly reasonable to say that “industries are responsible for industrial waste” and “the effects of industry can, should and must be fixed by industry” and “Industry can, should and must be held responsible for its impacts on the commons, such as air, water, oceans and land.”

Seeing a black cat is actually good luck. A frog or toad is also good luck. A leech is great luck

If you ever purposely harm an amphibian you’re cursed for life sorry I don’t make the rules. If you accidentally harm an amphibian that’s still bad luck but I think the universe understands that accidents happen

If you see a snail it removes any curses you may have accumulated. This is because snails eat curses

You should be writing this down

Do screenshots count