99 legal sites to download literature

The Classics

Browse works by Mark Twain, Joseph Conrad and other famous authors here.

Textbooks

If you don’t absolutely need to pay for your textbooks, save yourself a few hundred dollars by reviewing these sites.

Read More

The Faded Page, which has books that are in public domain in Canada. Lots of Canadian lit, but also lots of mysteries and other works! I recommend the Sayers Collection in particular.

I. AM. FLOORED.

In britain, you can't just call someone a "guy" or "dude" anymore. Because of bloke.

Remember if you’re out at a store and someone says “This is a robbery” you can say “no it’s not” and then the robber will leave because theyre a robber and this is no longer a robbery .

You can not just say this without dropping the whole story

Ok so,

My dads coworker is at the front and this man comes Up and hands him a document.

The coworker took a Look at the document and while he couldn't read the things written by Hand, because he wasn't wearing his glases, he did notice the Logo of a different Bank so he's like:

"Oh, sorry sir you can't do that here! You have to go to the other Bank for this :)"

The man, visibly confused leaves, but dosen't take the document with him.

The coworker, now just as confused as the Guy actually Takes Out his glases and reads the hand written part:

This is a robbery

Can you imagine trying to rob a god damn bank and the teller just cheerfully tells you to go rob the competition instead

I worked as a bank teller for several years and a few things you should know, bank robberies happen far more frequently than you might think and they come in waves. When a bank gets robbed a notification with photos goes to all banks in the area to be on the lookout. And there are two kinds of robbery, the pass the note and the takeover (what you see in movies).

So our branch had had a big takeover robbery as well as a note one. We also had a teller that had transferred to our branch after having been through a robbery. She was sweet as apple pie, hair up to the ceiling, southern lady who had just been through multiple robberies.

A guy comes in and hands her a folded note. Her immediate thought was “this guy needs to learn you don’t hand bank tellers notes. I am just not going to read that.” So how the conversation goes:

Her: how can I help you today?

Him: I’m here to get money

Her: great *hands him a withdrawal slip*

Him: all the information is on the paper

Her: to process the transaction I need you to put it on my piece of paper

SO HE FILLS OUT A WITHDRAWAL SLIP. Meanwhile another coworker is looking at her latest robbery notification email thinking the guy at the window looks a lot like him but the teller is calm and seems to be following standard transaction.

Back at the window the teller notices his name on the withdrawal slip doesn’t match the name on the account so she asks for his ID. He once again tells her all the relevant info is on the folded note but also gives her his ID and says it is his dad’s account. She tells him he will need a check from his dad to get cash. He grabs the note and leaves.

ONE HOUR LATER

Two new robbery notifications hit our emails, both branches within a mile. It is our guy. Teller goes over to the manager and sheepishly informs them he was here and the time. Security department is notified as are local police and the FBI. The FBI comes over believing that these poor tellers had been robbed for the 3rd time in a month and take her statement. She is completely embarrassed telling them how everything went down and he kept signaling to the note and telling her to read it but she was just done.

To which this FBI agent of 40 years who has been to the scene of many bank robberies (several at this branch in recent weeks) says: Ok. Let me see if I got this right, he came in fully intending to rob you. He gave you the note and you just…refused to read it? So he left and went to the bank literally across the street, handed them the exact same note, and they just handed him five grand? Do I have that correct?”

Her: I am so embarrassed

FBI: this is best thing I have ever heard. He even handed you his ID! Holy-

Her: I feel so dumb!

FBI: don’t! This is the best thing I have ever heard. This is going to be in training courses. (He sat there giddy for at least 5 more minutes)

I have a similar story from my friend Fred, who is a great human and I like him lots.

He was working at a 7-11 that got robbed a lot, working nights. And he was bored and read though his entire contract and learned if you're shot at work you get $200,000. Also, he hated his boss and the job.

So when a guy came in to rob him at gunpoint he got excited and was able to hatch the plan he had been pondering while dealing with a Shitty Boring Job.

"Dude. Shoot me in the leg. Right here- it'll go through and not hit anything vital and I'll be able to quit this fucking job. I'll give you fifty fucking grand to shoot me in the leg then you can take everything in the register."

This ended with him chasing the weeping attempted burglar out of his store screaming "SHOOT ME YOU FUCKING COWARD I WANT THE MONEY".

@rmilkies

One of my uncles was a branch manager at a local bank when I was a kid. His branch had the dubious honor of being one of- if not the- most robbed bank in the area. There was a bullet hole in the wall behind his desk where he'd been shot at once.

One day, this guy came in and announced he was there to rob the place. This man was smoking a cigar with one hand and had a gun in the other.

My uncle pointed at the "No Smoking" sign and told him in no uncertain terms, "Put that cigar out, or finish it outside first."

This guy, bless his heart, went back outside to finish his cigar.

My uncle locked the door behind him and waited for the cops to show up.

This is what I like to call the Bugs Bunny Deescalation Strategy

having a little jingly keychain is all fun and games, until you’re walking around somewhere that’s dead quiet…..like oh i’m sorry i just my trinkets are jangling around……n suddenly your the court jester and everyone is pointing and laughing at you for your noisey fucking keychain…..bobo the clowncore

i feel like planting your foot on their wings and exerting just enough pressure to threaten to snap the hollow bones within beneath your heel, or impaling them with your blade, would be a fetish for at least some angels

its mine for damn sure

Ha a lélek vándorlásában hiszünk, el kell fogadnunk hogy ha zenészek voltunk, zenészek maradunk akkor is, ha négy lábbal újraszületünk..

Translation, via Google Translate:

If we believe in the migration of the soul, we have to accept that if we were musicians, we will remain musicians even if we are reborn with four legs.

Because I’ve lost control of my life

reblog for the blessed 100k

IVE ONLY HEARD WHISPERS OF THIS POST

Tumblr is a fate driven website. You can't find posts through the search function, you see them when you're meant to.

Okay for my followers who don't keep up with marine bio news: this is HUGE

A living, baby great white shark has NEVER been seen before, much less caught on camera. Scientists have never been able to figure out where great white sharks give birth to their babies. A lot of researchers believe them to be born pretty far out in the ocean. But this footage was caught just off the coast of Southern California.

And this little guy? Is potentially only HOURS old. In the videos he can be seen shedding some kind of film that researchers believe could be embryonic fluid from its mother's womb.

Now there is another theory about why it could look like this, something to do with a skin disorder, but the researchers who found it believe this to be fairly unlikely.

Here is an article that talks about it more.

I don't know, how about switching it off?

Have you tried turning it off, and not turning it back on again?

Happy Pride, everyone! 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

*combusts into a pile of star stuff*

being younger than everyone else on this site is so funny because someone will be like "anyone remember the glinky glork" and i look up the glinky glork and it happened when i was 2

"where were you at dashcon" i was learning my abcs 👶

important addition from the elders

A Zionist Jew and and Anti-Zionist Jew walk into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve Jews."

It's funny because in 1863, a Jewish group in Jerusalem published the first Hebrew newspaper in the Land of Israel, called 'HaLevanon', opposing the establishment of new settlements in Eretz Yisrael. Five months later, another Jewish group in Jerusalem published their own rival paper, 'Havatzelet', expressing the opinion of those supporting the settlement of Eretz Yisrael.

A few months later, Ottoman authorities shut down both papers.

oh this is a life saver

So these are both “Aw Fuck I’m outta real food” meals BUT ALSO:  if you’re learning how to cook, these are great “baby steps” meals to learn how to cook basics into something enjoyable without “wasting” anything expensive.  Though I maintain that even cooking screw-ups are valuable in terms of lessons learned.

Also they’re great for when you get absorbed in something and you realize your blood sugar is dropping and you need to make something Quick.

Making basic storecupboard or fridge ingredients less basic and more nutritious.

Glass of water (oil on canvas) Artist / Emma May Riley

EVERYONE STOP WHAT YOU’RE DOING THIS IS AN OIL PAINTING

Emma May Riley

REMINDER THAT ANTISEMITES AREN’T WELCOME HERE AND WON'T BE TOLERATED