(We are in a radio station, witnessing Art the Clown over power and wrestle a radio DJ to the floor, while the Little Pale Girl looks on with her wicked grin.)
(There station is adorned with Halloween decorations and the DJ is dressed in a red devil costume. Art is in the process of crucifying the DJ to the floor; his muffled screams indicate he’s either gagged or had his tongue removed, but he is unfortunately still alive.)
(The Little Pale looks to see the station is getting calls in. With a click of the button, the Little Pale Girl takes her seat and starts speaking in the DJ’s voice.)
Little Pale Girl: “Caller, you’re on! How can we, at W.616, help you tonight on this All Hallows Eve ?”
Caller (a young man, early to mid twenties): “Uh hi, I’m just calling in to see if everything’s alright. Y-you guys cut off for a minute there.”
Little Pale Girl (still mimicking the DJ’s voice, though there’s a slight nervous edge about it): “Uh, we had a slight weapons malfunction, but uh… everything’s perfectly all right now. We’re fine. We’re all fine here now, thank you. How are you ?”
Caller: (sighs reluctantly) “I’ve…I’ve been better.”
Little Pale Girl (still mimicking the DJ): “Well, tell me what’s up, Tom ?”
Caller: “I never said my…Okay, there’s this girl. We go way back in high school, y'know ? We used to be an item, but we’re still friends.”
Little Pale Girl: (still mimicking the DJ) “Aaaand ?”
(As she’s speaking, Art takes two other nails, lining them up with the DJ’s nostrils, readying his hammer.)
Caller: “She’s engaged, with another friend of ours. And I want to be happy for them but-”
Little Pale Girl: (mimicking the DJ) “Are you feeling nostalgic ?”
Caller: “I just…I can’t help but feel something’s great slipping through my fingers.”
Little Pale Girl: (Still speaking in the DJ’s voice, presses the tips of her fingers together, nodding) “Mmhmm, mmhmm, I see. I see. Tell me Tom, have you heard about the Lonesome Loser ?”
Caller: “I-I don’t think so.”
Little Pale Girl: (as the DJ) “He was beaten by the Queen of Hearts everytime. Now Tom ? He’s a loser Tom, but he still keeps on trying. And that’s why he’s a loser, he doesn’t know when to quit.”
Little Pale Girl: (As the DJ) “Tell me Tom, are you still friends with her ?”
Little Pale Girl: (as the DJ) “And her fiancé ?”
Caller: “I mean we both met him in college, but it’s like-”
Little Pale Girl: (as the DJ) “You care about them both, but you’re starting to miss the good old days. Now Tom, take it from someone who knows-”
(As she’s saying this, Art is using a pair of pliers to yank at the DJ’s teeth. Art, apparently listening in on the conversation, nods in agreement with what she’s saying.)
Little Pale Girl: (as the DJ) “It’s easy to get caught up in the past, and grieving the past as our lives begin to change. Now we all miss what once was, but by clinging to it, and trying to pull others with you, it keeps things from going forward. Today is a gift, that’s why it is called the present. The best thing, for your friends and yourself, is for you to be supportive of them moving forward. They clearly want you to be part of their lives.”
Little Pale Girl: (as the DJ) “No. You know. Guesses are assumptions of what we can’t be unsure of.”
(The Little Pale Girl regards Art, having yanked out the DJ’s teeth, passing her a golden tooth. The two share a clap together, as Art begins pouring gas on the DJ’s still living body.)
Little Pale Girl: (puts on a record, speaking over the initial instrumental, still speaking in the DJ’s voice) “Now you’re listening to BL. Z Bubb, and I’m gonna be keeping you company right here, on the midnight shift.”
(The Little Pale Girl leans back in the chair with a relaxed expression on her face, taking a drink from the DJ’s mug.)
Tracy Chapman (playing on the record): “You got a fast car/I want a ticket to anywhere/Maybe we make a deal/Maybe together we can get somewhere/Anyplace is better/Starting from zero, got nothing to lose/Maybe we’ll make something/Me, myself, I got nothing to prove…”
