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And in that moment, I swear we were infinite

@i-wanna-live-in-new-york

Just chillin'

The thing about self harm is that it will always be there to welcome you back home. Like that one teddy bear from when you were a child, soemthing as an adult you know you shouldn’t need anymore, but it still makes the long nights easier. It’s the toxic ex-boyfriend that you know is no good for you, and yet you can’t let him go. When I was twelve and started I wish someone had have told me that seven god damn years later I would still be struggling with it. That every time something remotely bad happens my mind would chant, cut cut cut. Like people cheering for their favourite team at a hockey arena. Lotus and persistent, leaving a ringing in my ears long after the game is over. Because it helps, that’s the grossest part of it all. It brings you back down to earth when you feel like you’re gonna float away into the atmosphere. Once you start there’s no going back.

4am