Tongue tied

I’m a Pisces and that’s why I gotta go home.

My parents have been married for 19 years and together for 20 and I asked them what they were doing for valentines and they both looked so disgusted and said it was commercial and they hated it and then my dad said to me that every year he sends her flowers her favourite chocolates and a card pretending to be a secret admirer because although they think it’s a stupid holiday he wants her to have chocolate and then I went to my mum and asked about her secret admirer and she said it was a running joke between them cause my dad spends the day saying he’s gonna beat up her secret admirer and they both know it’s him but it’s been going for twenty years and my mum keeps the cards and if that isn’t love idk what is

For all those who saw the last Stan the Water Man stream

my partners never gonna be allowed to see my social media, ever. some things are just too intimate to share with anyone except thousands of strangers at once

post-apocalyptic wastelands are a criminally underused gay romance setting

no homophobia, just 2 lesbians, their dog and the horribly irradiated mutant creatures they encounter during their travels across the blasted wastes of civilization

*gets in an uber* hi yeah i know i said i wanted to go somewhere but im actually just going through a hard time rn can you put on some fleetwood mac and take me through a carwash

Today I called a girl homophobic as a joke and she almost started crying

She said “my neighbors are a lesbian couple! I’m the least homophobic person you’ll ever meet”

I said “Kelsea I’m really sorry I hurt your feelings but I need you to know that homophobic people can have lesbian neighbors” and she just got even more distraught and said “I’ve been inside their house and I wasn’t even afraid or anything”

AFRAID OF WHAT??

why is Every Single endgame trailer just

[single piano note]

[shot of everyone moping]

steve or something: we……..gonna do this

[DRAMATIC STING. PAUSE. PURPLE FLASH]

[shot of them moping in another room]

me reading 1984 in high school every time the main dude would give a description of the only female character: big brother just kill this clown

Victor refusing to make the Monster a wife because he was worried they’d breed is such a cop out. Like, you’re cobbling together body parts from charnel houses. You can just not give her any ovaries. You can just spay her like a cat. Why are you this dumb Victor. You’re a doctor.

the implication that victor spend weeks giving the monster a working dick is also extremely weird

I apologize if I ever was a toxic person in your life, I’m maturing more everyday, correcting my wrongs and slowly but surely becoming a better version of me.

my review on life so far:

★ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

When someone uses an abbreviation and I have to look it up

Yes

Ariana: “We’re gonna be alright”

Me: why she lyin

Types of people