the barking buck

NEW PINNED POST

Blog has gotten a bit of a revamp (again), so here's a few important notes:

Horny Blog Turned Main, minors will be removed and blocked swiftly

You can expect: playlists, nudes, horny writing, hornyposting, queer writing, poems, and anything else I deem important

This is still a blog run by a big fat transsexual bulldyke, not gonna make label soup about it, this is not a place where bigotry or cruelty will be protected or tolerated

Ask box will remain open

DMs open for mutuals or upon invitation

"I wouldn’t say that I even try to be affirming in [my] work […] at times you can’t possibly offer affirmation or any sort of comfort. In a song like ‘Who We Are’, it’s about simply sitting in and accepting that this undeniable terror is part of life on Earth. We bear witness to this experience of life with all of the light and shade; not one thing is ever perfectly terrible or perfectly great" -Hozier

When I am wallowing in suffering, I look to simple things for comfort, in that understanding the world around me makes me feel safe, and my brain will break down whatever part of reality is necessary for me to think in black and white.

But the world does not exist in dichotomies, there are many paths to every goal, many actions behind every hand, many hurts behind every love, many lives behind every loss.

I hear "not one thing is ever perfectly terrible or perfectly great" and in an unexpected way, the nuance lies in everything being both, that's what's unspoken here, that human lives are both perfectly terrible and perfectly great.

I ride the bus and I work overtime and I harvest wild food and my phone service got cut off because I have to save the money for rent and I am a perpetual motion machine, love and ecstacy, grief and monotony. I am climbing out of a pit in my soul. I have found the salve to the rot in my chest and it is people, it is action, it is music, it is the "through" in the phrase "the only way out is through" it is a coworker buying me lunch, it is the screaming man, it is the lives I see etched into the bodies of strangers, it is the transition in the soft animal of me, from yearling to buck. It is the cataclysmic end and the buried seed, the tide of a human heart crashing against a steep cliff, raging to claw out a fingerhold in the sides.

Part of what is frustrating for me as an autistic person is how I frequently the details of important concepts get brushed over. The example that I'm on about right now is "good communication"

"Good communication" involves much more than not talking when the other person is talking and being honest about how you feel. When you're the verbal party, it's important to be aware of triggering phrases and avoid using them. Before you make concrete statements about how you feel, examine those feelings, learn where they come from and decide if they're in alignment with what you want to accomplish. This is not to say you should deny feelings you have, just direct them to an appropriate outlet that isn't going to hurt anyone else, especially when you're trying to have a conversation that benefits both parties.

When you're listening, it's important to put down the assumptions that you have about the person you're communicating with, because it gives them a space to explore what's going on between you without guilt ot obligation to the version of them that you have in your head. I have a really hard time doing this, recontextualizing peoples experiences with my own life as a guide seems natural to me, but my life experiences are limited and they're riddled with biases that I am working to unpack. When you listen this way, with a distinct focus on your conversation partner in the moment, you are making yourself vulnerable to criticism and available to grow with your partner from the conversations you have with them.

If you mean this one

I drew it so

Not to be a little criminal but I ripped the nice drivers out of one of my fancy corporate work headsets (free.99) and I'm gonna put them in the 10 dollar headphones my friend got me that I crocheted custom comfy covers for.

Reblog if you wanna see the nonsense custom headphones in question !

After she came in me tonight, she curled up under my arm and pressed herself, still hard as deep as she could get while I pressed my vibrator against my dick and milked her from head to base, half trying to finish, but really only being able to think about her slick femme cum coating my insides as I felt the tip surge and leak more of her heat into me and listened to her soft little animal moans. It was like I was holding her and being held by her at the same time, it felt so comforting and sweet. I love her in my brain and my heart and my body, sometimes my brain and heart get more anxious than they need to be, but being with her In my body like that helps my brain and heart to see clearly and know that everything is okay.

I also get to jerk off with her cum in me later and that always makes me feel like I'm hers which is so comforting and so hot

"I want to be as deep in you as I can be when I cum" she says, as though her sensitive delicate glans isn't rubbing sloppily past and against my cervix, so buried in me already that I can feel her hip bones glued to my ass and thighs while she rocks forward, so ready to cum that I can feel the twitch of her blushing erection through my whole body