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Gemini Fairy

@honeysuckletook

what ever I find funny is what I repost. Demi sexual. she/her pronuns. I am not interested in the BDSM culture, no judgement just not interested. also definitely not ever going to be anything but in charge, so if interested in servant slave definitely wrong person.

if you’re a new tumblr user from tiktok or IG or something and only like posts and dont reblog them yeah people will think you’re a bot and block you but you will also make this website actively worse. they want “algorithmic” users like you, served recommended posts through likes, not people who just follow each other and respond to the direct chronological feed. there is a reason this website is still better than the rest, even with all its problems, do not ruin this

ok i need to make this clearer: if you do not reblog posts and only like them you are contributing to this site actively getting worse and becoming like all the apps you hate. keep likes to things you just wanna keep off your blog. reblog everything else. ESPECIALLY fanart, which always needs a reblog.

and FYI: what i’m saying here is backed up by tumblr themselves. they admit this publicly.

if you want a good RECENT (as of the end of February 2022) overview of what is going on behind the scenes at tumblr, it is basically what i’ve been saying for years: the core staff is tiny, constantly not being listened to when they advocate for us, the community, and working there is a nightmare:

Reblogging to encourage people instead of only liking is really not that fucking hard if you dont want people to be discouraged cuz their stuff get zero interactions and 99% useless likes and be driven off the Platform.

Thank yall for this! I thought reblogging wasnt good because that it just puts stuff out there that is already out there, but now i am going to reblog bc I learned and stuff ig. IDK what i was going to say

ig thanks bc now im not scared to reblog out of fear of hate

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as a general rule. if what we’re calling ‘cultural appropriation’ sounds like nazi ideology (i.e. ‘white people should only do white people things and black people should only do black people things’) with progressive language, we are performing a very very poor application of what ‘cultural appropriation’ means. this is troublingly popular in the blogosphere right now and i think we all need to be more critical of what it is we may be saying or implying, even unintentionally.

There is nothing wrong with everyone enjoying each other’s cultures so long as those cultures have been shared

Eating Chinese food, watching Bollywood movies, going to see Cambodian dancers, or learning to speak Korean so you can watch every K drama in existence is totally fine. The invitation to participate in those things came from within those cultures. The Mexican family that owns the place where I get fajitas wants me to eat fajitas. Their whole business model kind of depends on it, actually. 

If you see something from another culture you think you might want to participate in, but you don’t know if that would be disrespectful or appropriative, you can just…ask. Like. A Jewish friend explained what a mezuzah was to me, recently. (It’s the little scroll-thing near their front doors that they touch when they come into their house. It basically means “this is a Jewish household.”)

“Oh, cool,” I said. “Can I touch it? Or is it only for Jewish people?”

“You can touch it or you can not touch it,” she said. “I don’t care.”

“Cool, I’m gonna touch it, then.”

“Cool.”

It’s not hard.

You want to twerk, twerk. I’ve never heard a black person say they didn’t think anybody else should be allowed to twerk. Just that they want us to acknowledge that they invented that shit, not Miley fucking Cyrus.

It really boils down to three simple things:

  1. Consent. Is the culture open to sharing this thing? (& don’t cheat by finding one person who consents while most of the culture disagrees.)
  2. Context. If a culture is open to sharing a thing but it is a thing of great religious significance, take the time to learn what is a respectful way to treat the thing. Probably don’t use it as random decoration or sexualize it unless that’s what it’s for. 
  3. Credit. Give credit and if possible, buy from the original creators so the money goes where the credit should be.

This is really useful to me personally because I’ve definitely caught myself losing sight of what cultural appropriation actually is, and why it matters, so thank you, and everybody else pay attention too

I've talked about this before, but emotional dysregulation is such a mother fucker aspect of ADHD.

Like, sure, not being able to regulate my attention sucks, but it's genuinely fucking nothing compared to the absolute rollercoaster of emotions I just went on because someone said something in a shitty tone, and now I'm having to actively walk myself through DBT methods lest my idiot shit for brains 'shiny-can't-sit-still-disorder' drop the match on that particular bridge because the rejection sensitive dysphoria feels like my chest is burning and not being able to act on the hurt feels like I'm suffocating under the weight of emotions pushing down on me and lashing out in anger is quicker than taking the time to self soothe.

And the annoying fucking thing is I know it's me.

I've done enough therapy to know my emotional response to their shittiness is overblown and dysregulated. I know I'm taking it to heart more than they could ever imagine.

And I've got to fucking sit with that and process it because if I don't, I'll be the inconsiderate cunt in this interaction and hhnnggg--wailing, gnashing, biting my thumb at you in the marketplace, etc, etc.

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One of the things that I have struggled to explain to people my entire life is that my emotions are bigger than [generic] yours, but that doesn't mean they're made up or fake.

Like, ever since I was a kid, my parents and adults around me belittled me for being 'dramatic,' and made it clear that I was 'too much' and should be less of what I am.

These emotions are very real. They're bigger than the situation calls for, but they're real.

The fastest way to get cast into the Outer Darkness is to tell me I'm being dramatic or making shit up. Nope. These emotions are very real, and they're very mine.

Solidarity, my friend.

it's very clear from some communists' visions of future city-planning that they expect disabled people to just shut up and die, lmao

  1. some disabled people need door-to-door transportation. public transportation will never work for everyone, no matter how much you emphasise that it is "accessible" to some
  2. if any part of your plan involves disabled people needing to "request" exceptions or "prove" that they are an exception or be questioned or tested or navigate any level of bureaucracy to become a Certified Exception, some people are going to be denied things they need & some of them are going to die

If you don’t mind me adding:

3. Some folks dream of the perfect commune where everyone contributes - specifically with labor. If a disabled person not contributing labor isn’t welcome in your community, you are just repackaging the capitalist “labor = worth” mindset

The number one funniest example of people inventing bullshit reasons ships they don't like are "problematic" that I've ever seen was people calling Brienne of Tarth and Jaime Lannister "like siblings".

Fam.

Have you forgotten the number one most notable trait about Jaime Lannister.

Pick a bottle any bottle lol

I recently read an article about a therapy group for depressed people who had all attempted suicide at some point. The breakthrough question for them was, “If your goal was to be just as miserable as possible, what would you do?” Most of them listed things like not getting enough sleep, or isolating themselves from everyone… the list goes on, but the point is, they listed things they already do. But now they saw those “coping mechanisms” for what they really were: things that were actively making their condition worse.

I read that article at 2:00 AM, asked myself, am I TRYING to be miserable tomorrow? And it was easier than usual to put my phone down and fall asleep. Even my intrusive “lying down” thoughts about meaninglessness and existential dread were easier to suppress when I framed them as things I’d think about to purposefully make myself feel as awful as possible.

Fuck that is helpful

“Donald Trump’s mental health and diseased mind are not likely to improve, given the pressures he now faces. And as goes Trump, so goes the Republican Party, the MAGA cult and the larger white right. In total, Donald Trump’s poor mental health and aberrant behavior amount to a political, social and legal crisis for America and the world. He must be defeated at the polls and prosecuted in the courts, but even that will not be enough.”
Source: salon.com
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I've been told before you shouldn't talk about politics or religion on a date because it might make things awkward, so I try to touch on both, partly because those are genuinely interesting subjects and partly because "bad first date" seems a thousand times better than "finding out six months later that you've fucked a staunchly conservative fundamentalist".

Like yeah disagreements are uncomfortable but you know what's worse? Waking up next to a dipshit

putting “lying to kids is ok” on the table immediately looks bad. but theres nuance. because kids deserve to have as much context and respect as anyone else you live with. but also. telling them that leaving doors open will make ants carry away the entire house is necessary until their brains can quantify the heating&air bill

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door: open

the ants: